Not Eating

[MissS_Zebra9]

Hi Everyone, I've not been on here for a while but could do with some advice. My partner has been in hospital twice over the last 3 years with alcoholic hepatitis (the second time his liver was failing but the steroids seemed to work) and he was back to normal. Almost a year on from his last hospital admission he has started to go downhill again, he is very tired and has no energy, he hasn't been to work for the last few days but went to work today. He also hasn't eaten a thing since last Thursday. Unfortunately he has continued to drink and still manages to get himself to the shop to buy more alcohol while he is unwell. My questions really is how long would he need to carry on like this before things get really serious? Many thanks

[lonmallin50]

I got took to hospital when I went yellow the first time I carried drinking 6 months later I went yellow again and it did not go ever till I had transplant 3 years later I wished I would have stopped first I could have avoided 3 years of being so ill it was a terrible time thinking Iwas going to die any day just just can’t imagine how bad it is I was probably like your husband thinking it won’t kill me just a bit of drink but it does your husband needs to stop if he been in twice already your liver will stop repairing itself one day and it’s a scary road to go down I managed to stop when I realised thank god I would not have made last Christmas if it weren’t for transplant last October hope he realises before it’s to late good luck Lon

[MissS_Zebra9 in reply to lonmallin50]

Good to hear that you are well again and managed to give up the alcohol 👍. Unfortunately for my partner I dont think he has reached a point where its been serious enough for him to realise what he's doing to himself, its just so frustrating to watch as I've now given up trying to help/reason with him as he is in complete denial. I'm just waiting for something awful to happen 😔

[Dogbot]

I’m sorry to say but thinks are serious now, as an alcoholic myself and hasn’t drunk for 20 years now, I can still remember knowing I had a problem and not being able to stop drinking. But I’m afraid it’s the answer, I know he will say he has no problem it’s so difficult. My liver gave up and I ended up in hospital very close to death and I had a fantastic specialist nurse that spoke to me and after a conversation she said you can either go out and buy another bottle of vodka or live to see your grandchildren. Now I had a loving wife,two wonderful children and couldn’t give up but when the nurse said that it got to me. Now that’s my story and it’s different for everyone but it comes down to your husband who has to get it in his head to stop and if he hasn’t gone to far he might be able to reverse the damage. I wish you all the luck in the world because it’s so hard on the partner of an alcoholic . Good luck to both of you 💕💕.

Stay safe All

Dogbot 🐶🌈Dave

[Cb1963]

I always think there's a reason why folks start to drink sometimes, certain trade's have been known to drink, the stress of a job, financial worries , deep rooted problems from younger days, family or even traumatic incidents, and once it gets a grip of you , then the addiction begins. Yes the tablets may have worked on the first occasion, and perhaps your husband is hoping that if things take a turn for the worse the tablets will be his saviour, but unfortunately once things go from bad to worse his health will become a major issue, trying to

" fix" an alcoholic is a humongous task, obviously stopping is a priority, and with that he needs professional help, counselling if required, all different types of people, yes maybe he doesn't want to attend an AA meeting, it works for some and not for others, the brain of an alcoholic is only wired up for self destruction, sometimes people have to be in a stage of severe illness before they realise what damage is being done.

Unfortunately the rest of the family are trying to pick up the pieces, your husband won't understand your needs or cares, alcoholics can be selfish once it gets a grip, in the meantime you are worried sick and possibly don't have the right support to help you, I can't give you all the answers, and maybe I can't explain myself properly, I try my best throughout the years of being a person who has had a very complex lifestyle to try and give some genuine help along the way, I was that alcoholic myself, and it hurts me to say I've not been the best of company to my family and friends, but after 12 years of being sober my life is in complete harmony .

If you can get him to stop, which maybe is a big ask, he has to start a new lifestyle, physically, mentally and trying to admit to his demon's can kick start the process of drinking again, the first few weeks are extremely difficult, people have that many different emotions flying around they feel, guilt, horror at different things they've done when drunk, sadness, anger, unfortunately the perfect cocktail is simmering away, and this is when people go and hit the drink again and are most vulnerable, yes I understand, but at the time i was that chronic alcoholic , I truly hope things turn a corner for you , your family and husband, kind regards Chris

[Aotea2012]

Things are serious now…if this isn’t going to be catastrophic then he needs to stop drinking. As someone who didn’t stop until I’d had a hospital admission and nearly died, I know exactly what he’s going through. You kid yourself that things are ok…in fact the drinking eases the worry and helps you blot it out. You know deep down you are doing yourself some real damage. Physically, mentally and emotionally. The thing is you just can’t stop. If I went without alcohol even for a day my anxiety was high, my cravings unbearable. Only a drink would calm me. He needs help. Two hospital admissions for hepatitis is just the start of a close association with the local hospital otherwise. He needs to get to his GP asap and seek help. They’ll be used to dealing with similar situations and will be able to guide him. You need to take good care of yourself. It’s an incredibly difficult situation for you. I hope that you are able to talk to a friend or family. You need support too.

[Audiking]

Hi, as a recovering alcoholic myself I found the hospital is the pinnacle turning point he has to find the root of his problem maybe try get him to chat to someone who has been through the same issues as him I’m happy for him to message me if he wants a chat as much as anyone without the problem tries to understand it’s not that simple sometimes you need to have lived it. I hope you both get the support you need