Update on hubby 13/7/2021: It is now... - British Liver Trust

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Update on hubby 13/7/2021

mumof3girls profile image

It is now just over 4 weeks since hubby had his last drink. He is doing ok, but still has shakes and is not sleeping at all well. This week the liver alcohol nurses have asked his GP to prescribe hubby a week of sleeping tablets to help him catch up on his lack of sleep over the paste few weeks. His moods are very up and down.

He is struggling with not being able to drive and it is really getting him down, as he feels that his independence has been taken away. He has not driven now for 4 weeks.

Hubby is still having tests. He had a endoscopy last week which showed some small varices, but nothing they are too worried about so they are going to repeat the endoscopy in 12mths.

This week hubby had a repeat Fibroscan, the guy doing the scan said that the results were not much different to hubby's last fibroscan Nov 2020.

Hubby has a DXA scan next week as they think his Osteopenia is now Osteoporosis?

Hubby has had his tilt test cancelled for the second time, so that is not until the middle of August now. They are hoping that this might give them a cause/reason for his blackouts.

Hubby is going back to see his liver specialist at the end of the month. The liver alcohol nurses have been checking in with us weekly, which has been a great support for us both.

As for me, I wont lie, its been really tough. I know it is not easy for hubby, but it is also not easy living with an alcoholic who is drying out. I am his carer, his driver, his crutch, his PA keeping family up to date with how he is doing, his verbal punch bag who he sounds off to, he housekeeper, his cleaner, etc. So I have booked myself some sessions with a counsellor? Not sure if I am doing the right or wrong thing, but everyone keeps telling me that I also need to be looking after myself? So thought I would give it a go?

23 Replies

I hope it all goes well with the counsellor - you really need someone who's there for YOU. x

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to bleeny

Thank you

You absolutely have to practice self care. Seeing a counsellor in a safe,non judgemental, confidential space for you to off load. All the best 😊👍

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to deanw41

Thank you

I’m sure most of us on here are delighted to hear you’ve decided recognised the need for some counselling. I for one have been in complete admiration of how you have stood by hubby and supported him. You’re definitely taking the ‘for better or worse’ bit seriously!! Very pleased to hear he has remained off the pop for 4 weeks too. Although he may not recognise it yet, every additional day off gives him a better chance to recover. Keep staying strong. Andy.

Thank you

Trust1 profile image
Trust1Administrator

Hi,

Thank you for the update, its really fantastic hubby has finally quit drinking but as you say, it must be very stressful for you both.

Counselling seems a really positive step, the members are correct, you are important too.

Keep us posted.

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to Trust1

Thank you

Hi mumo3girls I’m so glad to read your post today, I’ve read your posts now since you began to share yours and your husband’s journey. I think you have amazing courage both of you, your doing all the right things to deal with addiction. It’s a rocky road I hope you will start to reap the wonderful benefits of clean living and that will propel you both on to a happy and healthy life. Recovery is a job for life but as it strengthens you can take your foot off the break a little and see how far you’ve come. Just wanted to say really well done, not everyone can summon that courage.

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to Dotyy

Thank you

Hi, I was just thinking about you and your husband yesterday as we had not heard from you. Glad to hear that your husband is now 4 weeks without alcohol, its a hard slog but sounds as if he is in good hands. Also glad you are looking to see a counsellor, it does help to talk. I went to see one when I could note cope after my dad died and the sessions really help. You also need to take time out for yourself, if your daughters read these posts - please book your mum in for a pampering treatment or a lovely afternoon tea, as she deserves it!

look forward to your next update

take care PPx

Thank you. It was my birthday at the end of last month and one of my girls did get me a voucher for a pamper treatment

Can't really help with much else but to put your mind at ease a little re endoscopy. I have had 19 of them because I had so many bleeds they had to band off. However if they are very small, which is what I have had on the last two then they will be pretty confident that they won't grow. I have gone from having one every six weeks, to six monthly for the last two. So glad that you are going to see a counselor. You need to have a sounding post as well and to get things off your chest in a safe environment. Good luck to both of you. Xx

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to Scrags64

Thank you

6/7/21 was our pearl wedding anniversary, it was a very quiet day, as hubby has not been out to a pub or restaurant yet and I didn't want to put him under any undue pressure. Celebrations can wait for now

Glad to hear you are taking steps to look after yourself. Wishing you all the best with the counsellor xx

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to steckles

Thank you

Take some time for your self, without you he’s going to find it much harder to cope

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to ramblin

Thank you

You most definitely need to look after yourself. If you can't let it all out to someone, you'll crack up. Sending love and hugs ❤️🤗

Thank you

Well done on getting some support for yourself.4 weeks is good and he will start to feel better but watch out for the pink cloud effect (Google pink cloud addiction).

Make him aware of the pink cloud before it happens and he will get through it.

mumof3girls profile image
mumof3girls in reply to Roy1955

Thanks I will look it up now

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