Worried

[Happyluckymummyof2]

Hi I have chirossis of the liver through drinking and had been free from drink for a year and a half x Sadly I I have relapsed and I am gutted x I know it’s wrong and I want to stop. It all started in September when I got anxiety and the drink made it go away. I started on anxiety medication and that came with awful side effects so I continued to drink to get rid of them but they have settled so I want to get off it again and I willl. Can anyone advice on tapering at all as I will do this but I don’t want to just come off it x I don’t feel my body is dependent yet but I am scared as was admitted to hospital prior to giving up before and so scared x

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I'm sending you a private message, hope you don't mind.

[Hidden]

Hi. Happymummy! Oh yes you must be gutted at giving in to the poison. Although initially it may seem as though it's relieving anxiety the truth is it isn't it just adds to it. As you can see it is now making you anxious about the damage it's doing to your body. I know some people recommend cutting down on alcohol intake rather than stopping completely and immediately, I guess it differs from person to person so I would get advice from support groups or councellors. My thinking is you can drag out the "cutting down" indefinitely and then never really give up. My late husband had been drinking for years, was a true addict with cirrhosis and all the other illnesses it brings with it but he stopped intantly and completely for 3 months with the support of his 1 to 1 councellor .

Tapering was never an option for him it would have impossible. He would have rewarded himself with a 4th pint for only having 3 that day ! But as I say everyone reacts differently.

Unfortunately we never got to see it through as the previous years of heavy drinking toom its toll and killed him.

I'm sure you will read of others experiences on here but make sure you get professional advice.

Good luck hope you kick it for good this time

Laura x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Laura

Said before how sad I feel for you...

Wrt your comments I could NEVER have tapered my drinking either. I stopped immediately I was told I had to. Rightly ot wrongly (yes we’re all different) I didn’t want any help from anyone except my wife, and I got that 😁

Miles

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[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Please don't feel sad for me Miles. Yes been through some tough years but that aside my life has been and still is very happy and hectic. It's rewarding to know that sharing my life experiences here, along with so many others, is possibly helpful to a few people going through similar problems .

Lx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Well that’s good to know, I’ll have to learn to suppress my feelings sometimes 😁. Glad you’re OK. That’s me being serious before pilot sticks his oar in!

Miles

[Garyvh]

Hi, sorry to hear about the relapse, but it is very important not to beat yourself up with guilt about it.

Dust you self down and get back on the wagon, and definitely please don't write off what you've already achieved - this is just a glitch, it happens.

As for tapering I can say that it didn't work for me personally.

I've stopped twice in my adult life; the first time just because I was sick of it and wanted to do something else with my life. That time I just quit with no real side effects.

The second time I quit was because I could tell it was actually making me very ill. I decided to stop suddenly again as I'd done it previously without any physical or psychological issues.

3 days into quitting I collapsed in the pub, ironically I was out with friends, being a good boy and drinking alcohol free Becks.

Woke up in hospital, hooked upto all sorts withe the doctors telling me I'd had a seizure because of sudden alcohol withdrawal - my body had gone into shock as it had gotten used to working with alcohol in it, kind of thing...

When I got out I sought the advice of the local substance abuse services, who advised tapering off - they actually said to treat the alcohol like a medicine, and to take a bit if I started to feel ropey again.

Anyway I just carried on drinking as I was just to scared of having a seizure again and possibly dying.

I wanted to stop, but was too scared to as my body had become dependant on it. Psychologically I wasn't an addict, it was more an habitual thing. - but my body was addicted, and no one can tell you what its like being too scared to stop the very thing that is killing you, that you could die if you carry on but you could die if you stop, no one can tell you unless they've been there - which I'm guessing you have?

Two months layer I was back in hospital with acute alcoholic hepatitis, I was in 10 days and they medically detoxed me while I was in. Haven't drank since and won't again - the thought of having the horror of physical withdrawal again has put me off for life... I won't start again because I don't want have to stop again!

Oops, sorry for going on - just that I understand where you are coming from.

Have you looked into perhaps having a home detox? They will organise the meds you may need, also counselling and support, and just keep a general eye on you in the early stages of withdrawal.

Wishing you all the best.

You've got this! 💪✊

[Hidden in reply to Garyvh]

Great post Gary

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