This week has been even more difficult than the week I was diagnosed.
I was called in early to review my CT results, to be told that the chemotherapy was not working and all other medical treatments had been ruled out. Cholangiocarcinoma does not respond well to these treatments. Although I already knew this, I was hoping it would shrink the tumours enough to buy me some time with my family. One plus is that the tumours have not increased in size, but they will adapt and further sessions of chemotherapy are unlikely to help any more. Because of this my oncology team to the unusual step of sending me for an urgent 2nd opinion with a London hospital. My case had been discussed by video link & they had agreed to see me. So on Monday morning we took the train and met with a
Hepatic surgeon. They have offered me a chance to have more time with my husband and children and I am going to take it. On the 26th of June I will be having 65% of my liver removed together with my gall bladder & possibly some of the pancreas . This is close to the maximum allowable resection & leaves me with no other options should it fail, but after consideration I am unable to see any other options anyway. So I am going ahead with it. I promised my family that I would do anything necessary to stay with them, It's a promise I intend to keep.
Once again we are all in a state of shock. Just as I was getting into the groove with my chemo routine!
I have 101 things I need to get tied up before next week, all stuff I thought I had time to do.
So many thoughts racing through my head. So many things I need to say to so many people.
To the outside world I am smiling & pushing the positives of this chance that I have been given. But on the inside, I am teetering on the edge of breakdown. I have to believe that I will get through this operation & that I will have more time with my family, but I would not be human if I was not scared or fearful that I will not.
I do want to thank you all for your support on this site. You have been my sounding board when I had no one else to turn to.
Love & prayers to you and yours