Why I'm such a misery guts lately

Why I'm such a misery guts lately

See that picture in my avatar? That plump but reasonably pretty woman? That picture was taken 5 years ago and, apart from one I have where I appear to be posing as a goddess, it is my favourite ever picture of me. I hate having my picture taken.

Well, I had to have my pic taken for my dermatology file. I'm going to post that picture here, now, then I am sure you will understand. Bloody disease this is!

13 Replies

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  • I see the pain and sadness in your eyes and want to take it away but I also see the glint of determination in those eyes of the person that you still are,

    It's not acceptable to left in pain and suffering I don't believe in this day and age in my opinion. In my eyes you are beautiful Di xx

  • Just great big ((((hugs))) me lovely, you are still the goddess inside :) xx

  • Your eyes still shine with beauty - this photo is only one moment in time, and hopefully it will soon pass, especially if your new treatment combination is successful. Your comments and support and humour on this forum really cheer me up and make me feel that I CAN cope.

    Klaris xx

  • Not only are you the things mentioned above, you are also incredibly brave and generous to post this picture. You've seen mine - I'd never post it here.

    It will take a while for this new treatment to kick in. You have waited so long already and travelled a difficult path to get the understanding and treatment that you need. That alone is exhausting and stressful, never mind coping with the way you feel about the pic.

    There's no getting away from the fact that is not the best pic of you and no surprise that it makes you feel miserable, but there's also no denying that you are and always will be a beautiful lady.

    I look forward to seeing the 'after' pics.

  • You know me too well, Tig. I was thinking about how the majority of our profile pics are out of date, pre-steroid or whatever or, as in your case, flowers and symbolism. I am still that woman in the avatar but she is hiding somewhere at the moment and I don't seem to be able to coax her out. I felt fraudulent. And I wanted to share.

  • Bless your cottons my lovely.

    No way are/were you being fraudulent but I am touched by your decision to share, as I think everyone else here will be too.

  • We all feel so sorry for you but it is awful that the docs leave us with something that people turn to look twice or move away when we get to close!

    I do hope medications improve the situation and I find a good cry at night time helps me a lot.

    Thinking of you

    Felicity

  • Funny I thought about how nice your eyes were too.

    Di, if it's any consolation my face looked like that as well - the good news it has cleared up and the lesions have gone on to other places.

    Put up your goddess picture sometime please

    Lesley

  • Hi Di,

    You have been there for a lot of us with your lovely answers to the questions we have and I for one love reading your blogs and want you to know that we absolutely love you and will always be there for you if only in writing.

    I don't know you personally but one thing you definately aren't is fraudulent, you are a beautiful caring lady.

    I really hope things get better for you soon and am thinking of you.

    Sending you a big hug,

    Jo xx

  • Thank you to everybody who has responded to what was really a cry for help I think. You have made me feel so much better about myself, in fact -[trumpet fanfare] I am dressed!

    Many of you will know just how big this small act can be :-D

  • I can't help but be impressed by your strength. I have plenty of pics I would never want anyone to see and I usually just hide when I feel like that. You are an amasing woman to share a moment of weakness with us. My husband actually told me yesterday I look better now I've had my Methylpred IV as my face looks plump and pink instead of sunken and pale!

    Your post helped me to face people today in my limping state. It can be so hard to see that look of sympathy on anyone's face, even a friend. I was very tempted to send everyone away and just hide til I felt more like myself, but I am relieved and rejuvenated now I have seen people and felt a little like normal.

    I think you are an inspiration and I will be thinking of you and wishing you the best of luck with your latest treatment.

    PS even a model doesn't look great in a close-up photo like that so I do not think you should measure yourself by a shot like that!

  • All I could see were the beautiful blue eyes.

    You are a brave girl. I really hope the blemishes clear up quickly.

    It is so sad to see you without a smile on your lovely face. You are a goddess, and don't forget it. xxxx

  • Di Hun....I look at your picture and the tears are rolling down my face. It's not for feeling sorry for you, it's in complete admiration of the strong and totally beautiful person you really are and not the sad, dispirited lady that shows in this picture. I DO understand sweetie. I look very similar (without the fab bone structure !) Of all the people on here who I have come to know in a very short time, you are the one that sticks out as the shining example and someone I easily look up to and admire. I haven't got the guts to show a photo of myself yet.....I haven't even got the guts to tell you my real name. Please don't take off your lovely 'bunny' pic with the beaming smile...it's how I see you in my mind and I look forward to reading your funny sense of humour on this forum so much... it gives me personally a great boost. Thank you so much for sharing this ...I know how much you understand that it helps so much to know someone else is on my wave length. You have already helped me more than you will ever realise. You will always be beautiful Di...it's not skin deep. Big hugs XX

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