Hi everyone,
I've been on medication for a little more then two weeks now and I do see some difference but someday a are good and others I get bad thoughts again. Does this mean I'm really a sick bad person. Please answer me. I feel like I'm losing it again.
Ashley this does not mean you are a bad person all. In fact you are a great person and mom. Recovery takes a long time and medication is very important. I suggest calling your GP and share this info as they may want to make some changes.
Sometimes it can be awhile to find the right medication and that is why it is so important to keep taking it based on their directions.
You are doing great and know the thoughts are just temporary and let them go.
It DOES get better!
Hi Ashley, you're not a bad person. It's just the illness bringing the bad thoughts. I'm glad you've seen some difference with the medication and I hope it takes away the bad thoughts more and more. Hang in there!
Hi Ashley031,
Thanks for coming back to the forum and sharing your update. None of these bad thoughts mean you are a bad person, this is just the illness and recovery from it, which can be a hard process. I don't know whether the APP Recovery Guide has been shared with you before? Here is the link: app-network.org/wp-content/...
app-network.org/what-is-pp/...
Sometimes recovery can be a bumpy road, but it is one many of us have travelled, and you will get to where you want to be. Be kind to yourself and take care, we are all thinking of you, xx
Hi guys,
I just thought the medicine would cure me right away. I feel like I have voices in my head like its the devil or something. It makes me believe I want to do this even though deep down inside I would never. This is the worst thing I have ever been through. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. I pray to god every night and sometimes I keep praying until I fall asleep. I just need your support guys. Thank you
Hello Ashley031
We really are all here to support you. I think medication takes a while to kick in so you need to stay positive and strong. It's not easy when the voices are in your head. I well remember how commanding the voices were but with good medical care and treatment they will eventually fade. It is probably the worst thing most of us have been through but when you fully recovery you will feel you have achieved so much for the love of your child and family and be very proud of yourself.
Take care and I hope you have a restful sleep.
Hi lilybeth,
I felt like I was doing better and I was grateful that the medication was working so soon then all of a sudden I had terrible thoughts again. I don't know if the medication is in my system yet and maybe I am just having s bad couple of days. I know sometimes it could take up to about a month for the meds to kick in. I just want to be happy again. I want to be able to live life again. 😔
Hello Ashley
Perhaps it might be an idea for you to keep a diary of your thoughts so that you can show it to the doctor at your next appointment? He might then be able to see at a glance how you are struggling and suggest treatment to help you, such as CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy). Have you been offered talking therapy? Sometimes it can help to talk to a professional stranger who can make sense of your thoughts and reassure you.
There are ups and downs to recovery and sometimes you will have days that are not as good as others. You really will be happy again and have lots of good times with family and friends.
Take care ...... we are all thinking of you 
Hi lilybeth,
I see my therapist on Friday. I haven't seen her in awhile be I work so much but when I do see her she does help me understand that it's not me and I'm not a bad person. This illness just makes me feel like I'm awful and should be locked up. I'm beginning to hate myself
Hello Ashley
I'm glad you will be seeing your therapist on Friday and that she reassures you. I hope you have family support. You're not a bad person, shout back at the voice that tells you that! You're amazing for coping at this very traumatic time in your life ..... stay positive.
Hi lilybeth,
I do have a lot of support from family and friends. When these thoughts come into my head I feel all alone in this because they don't understand. I keep telling myself that's it just bad thoughts but it doesn't help. I'm so angry in like right now. I want to get through this and think of it has a bad memory
Hi Ashley, no way you're not a bad person, you didn't ask for this, this is the last thing you'd choose to feel like. When I was sick with PP I 100% thought I was doomed to be like that forever I thought I would never ever recover and the nurses kept saying "you will get better trust us, we've seen this before" and I hoped so much they were right and one day I felt OK for half an hour then the next day another half an hour next day an hour or two I laughed slowly worked my way up to having a good half day then a good day, I couldn't believe it was possible then I just got better and better. Biggest relief of my life. Spent two weeks away from my new baby, it was a terrible feeling.
Hi angviolet,
Did u feel like it was voices in your head when you were suffering from this?
Hi Ashley, um it was always just my own voice, no actual 'voices' but I would just vision different ways of suicide, or dropping the baby or something like that, always thoughts of bridges, cliffs, train tracks things like that. Where are you?
I am in the USA. Rhode island
Hi Ashley,
I just wondered if you have been in contact with two charities in the USA Postpartum Support International and Postpartum Progress? It is international but mainly based in the USA? You may be able to even find someone locally.
Here's a Postpartum Support International link to info about their USA locations etc:
postpartum.net/get-help/loc...
And here is the postpartum progress website: postpartumprogress.com/
I wondered if you may be able to find support in your area, where you could even meet someone face to face, or join a support group? or that they can advise you about getting more professional support etc.
I do hope that helps
I'm thinking of you a lot. I hope your therapy was helpful? I found therapy SO helpful too. And do keep a diary of your thoughts and mood, I'm sure that will really help in getting the support you need, as you can prove how you are.
Take care X
Hi Ellie,
Thank you so much for helping me out with this information. I'm glad to know I have a lot of support on here
Praying for me has always helped, keep it up. The medicine I'm sure is working a bit so keep taking it. Are you sleeping OK? See your gp to see if you can get stronger medicine. You are so strong for being able to deal with this at home. But it's OK to go to hospital if you need more rest and help
Do keep talking on here whenever you need support
Hello Ashley
I hope you will feel well supported by your therapist today when you meet.
Take care.
Hi lilybeth,
My appointment had to get changed to next week. My engine in my car blew so my car wasn't ready today. Today I'm doing ok. I still have a lot to tell my therapist. I just keep praying that someday I'll be myself again. Hope to talk soon.
I'm glad you're having a better day today. Thinking of you, and really hoping your therapist appointment next week will be helpful. X
Hello Ashley031
Thanks for your reply. I'm glad you are ok today, it will take time but you will be yourself again. At least you will be able to make sure you have your notes prepared for the therapist next week.
Stay positive and take c are.
Hoping for some advice:)
Postpartum psychosis help for a distraught husband and father seeking answers
Advice needed please ;0)
