Anxiety is a liar

[Anxiousman67]

hi guys first time posting here, was wondering if any u guys fear loosing control when having a panic attack and not being able to control yourself, not being able to calm down. That's my fear that I'm gonna run outside my home screaming n shouting. I have bad agoraphobia at the moment.

[Marc787]

Yes, I understanding what your going through. Its our mind, ours thoughts we are telling ourselves. If you can find ways to control what your telling yourself, fear and anxiety can be minimal at that time. Its not easy, but can be done.

[Anxiousman67 in reply to Marc787]

Yeah I've read every book going on the subject and in theory know how to handle panic situation, in theory tho is a different matter all together. When panic hits its hard to remain calm and realise it for what it really is just nervous energy, its our reaction to the first wave of fear that keeps us locked in the vicious cycle. Essentially its our fear of fear that keeps anxiety going n escalating. Wish there was a miracle cure for anxiety. When you look on forums such as this you see how many people actually effected by it.

[Diazepam_survival]

Hello Anxiousman67. So sorry to hear you are struggling with panic attacks/anxiety, the feeling can be overwhelming, I know how horrible it can feel.

Do you like listening to music? If so I highly recommend using headphones and play a few of your favourite tracks on a mobile device, it is a great distraction technique that focuses most of your energy on listening to the music rather than the horrors of the outside world.

Also from years of experience trying to fight/stop anxiety and panic attacks from happening i learnt that it is almost impossible to fight it and win the daily battle . This might sound contradictory but I've learnt that I have to let anxiety in to my life and be mindful of how it is affecting me, the more you fight it the stronger it will become so sometimes letting go and accepting it ironically helps ease the outbreaks.

[Anxiousman67 in reply to Diazepam_survival]

Hi there n thanks for reply I keep on saying to myself just let the anxiety be there dont fight it but inevitably it gets better of me lol. I end up on the receiving end of one all mighty panic attack which really knocks my confidence, but gotta keep on practising accepting the sensations/ thoughts. As regards listening to music yeah its a great distraction.

[designguy]

Hello Anxious, you're right, anxiety is a total liar. It's also a paradox so the more you resist the more it persists.

Sounds like you have read a lot about it but one of the books that helped me the most is "At Last A Life and Beyond" by Paul David. It's good practical advice about his journey in overcoming anxiety/panic.

[Anxiousman67]

Hi there thanks for reply I will definitely check that book out. I read loads n can see it makes sense but try to put it into practice is easier said than done.

[designguy in reply to Anxiousman67]

I know exactly what you mean about knowing vs. accepting, that's why I recommend his book. The other thing is medication, you don't mention if you are on or have tried meds but I found them useful to realize what "normal" was like. Obviously, they aren't for everyone and I went through a number of them before I found what worked. I took a genetic meds test which was payed for by my insurance and it helped determine which ones were best for me. The test i took was from Genesight, but there are also other brands available.

[Anxiousman67 in reply to designguy]

Hi I'm on mirtazapine 15mg for 2 months but decided to stop last nite as I'm not sure its doing much and I really hate taking medication. So might try something new or just try n grin n bear it as I'm on waiting list for cbt but as its nhs the list is long been told it will be months. Unfortunately mental health problems are becoming more prevalent especially with corona virus. Think mental health services are really struggling.

[designguy in reply to Anxiousman67]

I know that one of the last things you probably want to do is more research but you might want to check and see what they say about how long it takes for mirtazapine to take effect and the recommended dosage amounts, if you haven't already. Some of the meds take 2 or 3 months to take effect.

I started on prozac which did not help, was switched to zoloft for a number of years with little effect, then switched to buspar again with little effect. I was then prescribed klonopin which helped but it's long term usage is discouraged. After my test I tried pristiq which has definitely helped and discontinued the klonopin. With all this being said, I found that I still had anxiety and it took therapy and self education/acceptance to recover. The pristiq helps in calming my mind and overall mood but like I said, meds aren't for everybody.

For me it also helped to understand why I developed anxiety disorder which in my case was social anxiety. I was bullied as a kid and developed it from that, i was also raised in a strict religious household. This led me to developing complex ptsd which I was treated for by a therapist who specializes in treating trauma using talk and emdr therapy. I think knowing why and how the anxiety developed really is helpful to get the right kind of treatment.

Remember to just keep putting one foot in front of the other and be open to learning and change, recovery is definitely possible.

[Anxiousman67 in reply to designguy]

Ive never really thought about how my anxiety started had it for years now, maybe put it down to my lifestyle. I was a big drinker from my late teens to my early thirties tho I haven't drunk for 14 years now. Ive stopped taking the mirtazapine and the insomnia has kicked in its horrible not sleeping. Feel like a zombie and its making my anxiety escalate.

[Agora1]

Anxiousman67, there is no way that I couldn't be drawn into this chat.

You have taken a big step forward in knowing that Anxiety Lies. In knowing

that fear begets fear. Now with the help of this forum and those of us who have

beat down Anxiety, you can learn to find the "key" *that magic wand which is

Acceptance of Anxiety.

Anxiety starts with a thought which then allows it to escalate into a physical symptom.

Sometimes it's a symptom that makes our "what if" thoughts go astray.

Either way, Anxiety plays this game with our mind. A game we won't win until we learn

to accept and not fight this insanity.

You are in the right place at the right time my new friend. Many of us have on this site gotten our lives back, now with our help, you can too. Welcome! xx

[Anxiousman67]

Wow what an uplifting reply thanks for that friend, last few months have been incredibly tough and I'm still struggling even thinking it would be better not being here as I feel such a failure to my family with not being able to work and contribute financially leaving lots of pressure on my wife to provide financially. But not being able to take my kids out is killing me but I'm never giving up im gonna get my life back, I need to for myself and my family.