I’m so scared. I just want to be okay. Suicidal. Anxious 25/8

[krob011]

I’m so scared. I just feel like something isn’t rigjt on my body. I think i may have a brain tumor or brain cancer. I’m 18. I’m a senior in high school, joining the marine corps but idk, if this continues i’m gonna cancel my process. I’ve been having panic attacks like crazy, constantly googling my symptoms, missing school for useless dr appts, i’ve pissed my parents offf because i’m having them stress all because of me. I thought i had meningitis and i screamed and panicked so badly. i didn’t, google just scared me. Turns out it went away when i took a xanax. however, i got dizziness, blurry vision, no appetite, ear pressure, eyes feel like they won’t focus, chest pressure, headaches, an urge of needing someone to comfort me, and for some reason my right hand isn’t working and seems very weak. I’m so scared. This is affecting me so much, i’m trying to go out places to forget this and these symptoms, i even lost my virginity to my friend because i thought it would help my stress but no, it sucked, and i regret all this and i feel like dying. I just want to be normal. I feel like this is a dream. In which, i had a dream i had brain cancer before this all, what if this bs really is brain cancer. I’ve had tests done and all normal , except for an MRI and CT scan of brain. I know i had a MRI back in 2014 for something regarding my spinal dr, and it was normal. I saw a eye dr today and had an eye exam, everything was fine, she said my nerves looked beautiful, but i’m developing an astigmatism in my other eye and vision has kinda changed. It was so weird. I was fine until i got to googling stuff again. I’m so afraid. I don’t want to be a cancer patient or have a surgical procedure that cuts into my brain. I really hope this is anxiety. Can someone pls help me. Drop ur number, drop ur social media. I feel alone. I feel so fearful everyday, it’s 5 am here in texas, i’m crying, i’m scared, i wanna just be me again. i hate this

[elicarol]

Hi reading your post and I have gone through what you are feeling many times.Quit google everything you are feeling its making you sick most of it is anxiety,fear I have had major problems with adrenal and thyroid I started getting panic attacks made myself very sick. Hang in there you can contact me anytime you want to talk you ate going to be ok

[elicarol in reply to elicarol]

are

[Bingee123]

Message me Roxanne skeete on facebook

[krob011 in reply to Bingee123]

what do u look like ma’am

[gemp54]

So sorry you're feeling this way. I've felt this way so m any times. I've had all these symptoms and more so many times. I've convinced myself I've had every cancer going, MS and many other things. Currently my anxiety's back and I have aches and pains everywhere, particularly down one side of my neck, blocked and sometimes slightly painful ears, extreme tiredness, no appetite, nausea. What I do tend to find helpful is to focus on the symptoms that have gone away and help to realise how I symptom hop. For example 2 months ago I had a dead/weak feeling in my left arm and I was convinced I either had a brain tumour or MS. My symptoms then turned into more headaches, eye problems, dizziness etc because that's what I'd read were brain tumour symptoms and it wasnt until weeks later that I realised I'd been focusing so much on my new symptoms that the arm weakness had disappeared because I'd stopped thinking about it. I now need to get my mind off these new symptoms to get rid of them but without latching onto something new. Unfortunately I don't have a magical cure for you but hopefully it helps to know other people are going through the same thing and I'm always free for a chat if you want to message me when you need someone who understands. X

[Amrinlama]

The main thing is the brain so please don’t listen to brain listen to your heart and say all is well

I have done cold turkey and all these side effect came I start google make worried more n more so please no more google

Still I have sometimes panic attacks but I keep telling myself I am ok and today plan is mine are this this etc focus on my daily plan to make myself busy so please listen to your heart

Everything is ok

[jeanesdream]

I know how you feel. Its hatd to get over anxiety issues...you have to just assume you are ok physically. Know i thought i had everything under the sun....figurrd id be gone by now if i did since ive felt like this for a while now. I finally got back on cymbalta and can actually drive now....but not by myself. Just know you will get ovrt this....so many have our same probs these days...its hard i know....some days better tban others but you will have more good days than bad soon. Hang in there. Try to not worry....that hie i got in my shape. Maybe you arr stressed about the military...might not be your cup of tea.. Be good to yourself...do what pleases you. Get on an anxiety med to help you get well. I know it sucks...have a good cry to get throuh the days until you no longer feel the need. I was a mess...slowly but surely im better...you will be too....