Strange physical state!

[pawannogariya]

Hello,

I am suffering from a strange physical state which is not getting captured in any of the body tests, to explain it I have to give you some background of my mental health

I will try to be as precise as possible

First thing I want to tell you about myself is that I belong to the HSP (Highly sensitive people) group and so I have always been very sensitive towards everything that happens around me and within me.

And because of that I have always suffered from social anxiety since my childhood, but the anxiety was always limited and so I could easily manage with it, but from last seven eight years either the anxiety has become so powerful or I have become very week that the anxiety increased so much that it became hell for me.

For around four five years I lived in hell, my anxiety reach to the point where whenever I would talk to anybody my whole being become conscious of that person's presence and his eyes looking at me (just by imagining) that I would give so much pressure to the back of my eyes area, my eyes area become so conscious that I try to react consciously and it would give me a lot of pain. This thing went on for around five years.

Then from last two years this things has lower down but what has happened is my whole body feels to be pushing to the front side, specially I have a constant push on the face from the back of my eyes and so I don't feel anything now since my body never remains in the relaxed state. I don't feel my eyes in the way I used to feel them and so I see the things but its like a dead person seeing a thing without any feeling.

It feels like I am somewhere else just doing the things like a robot. I do feel things but not in the way I used to, and I feel this all purely physically and so I visited many orthopedic doctors and had many MRI scans of my back, my head everywhere but everything came out to be perfectly fine fine as far as my body is concerned.

It feels like my body has acquired a state as a security measure where I will not feel anything and so I will not have to face the fears and anxiety that I felt for years.

Thinking that I visited psychiatrist also and took there medicines for sometime and everytime the medicines made me worse. I tried atleast five psychiatrists.

Now I don't know where to go, to whom to consult

Why I said that it as a state of body because it is not something that happens when I get anxious and gets normal when I am not.

No! It is something that is now a state of my body no matter what I am doing, what I am thinking!

Long story I know!

But if you can advice me anything that would be great!

Thanks

[Jeff1943]

Pawannogariya, bearing in mind the number of MRI scans you've had and the amount of medical attention I think it's clear that what you describe is not "physical state" but a "nervous state".

This is caused by over sensitisation of the nervous system and all your symptoms and obsessions stem from this and not any physical cause.

Why be surprised that nothing shows up on any of the medical tests - nor ever will? Anxiety does not show up on an MRI scan, you cannot x-ray anxiety and blood tests do not measure anxiety.

Your way forward is to turn your attention from the symptoms to the cause of the symptoms ie nervous over-sensitisation. When the latter is cured all the fake psychsomatic symptoms will disappear.

To recover you must stop fighting your symptoms. Fighting only causes more stress and strain, the last thing your nerves need. You've been fighting this thing for years, what good has fighting done you? Exactly. So now you must do the opposite of fighting which is to say acceptance. Accept all the symptoms for the time being calmly and without fear. Surrender to them completely. This way you stop flooding your nervous system with fear hormones and your nerves will gradually desensitise and return to normal mode and all your troublesome symptoms will be no more.

[Indigojoe in reply to Jeff1943]

The whole time I was reading Paw's post I was thinking this person is the perfect candidate for Clair Weeks.

Over sensitized nerves must find peace, and Clair Weeks helps you find it.

[Jeff1943]

Indigojoe is right, you will find understanding, reassurance and a route to recovery in a little book written years ago which has helped hundreds of thousands of people to escape the nightmare of high anxiety. The author is Dictor Claire Weekes who first set out the Acceptance method for recovery. In the U.K. the book is titled 'Self help for your nerves' while in the U.S. the same book is titled 'Hope and help for your nerves'. Both versions available new or used from Amazon. I stronly recommend this book to you.

[pawannogariya]

Jeff1943 and Indigojoe

Thanks for the replies, I have already purchased the book "Self help for your nerves" and am reading it.

But Jeff as you mentioned, I am not fighting with my symptoms. I have accepted them long back and that is the reason I am able to do my daily stuff without worrying about them, I work in the office, talk to people, sleep properly etc. everything.

The problem is they are not going away even I don't worry about them, because even if I don't worry or think about them that doesn't mean they are not bothering my body.

And actually it will not be right to call them symptoms, because my whole body is changed to a particular state where I don't feel any energy, I don't feel my body, my back, my eyes anything the way I used to feel. Even I don't feel my identity the way I used to feel. It feels like my body is working like robot and there is no feeling.

So I have accepted all of this and that's why I am able to live my life but just by accepting them is not making them disappear.

So that's why I was asking should I try again a psychiatrist or something else.

[Jeff1943]

Have you discussed your symptoms with your doctor to rule out a physical cause: thyroid problems can cause symptoms the same as anxiety. Rare but a simple blood test will indicate if it is or not and if positive a tablet a day resolves it. But it is a very rare cause iof anxiety-like symptoms.

Other than that I would just say: are you sure you are really accepting the symptoms/feelings and not just 'putting up with them'? Also have you allowed enough time to pass for recovery through acceptance, Claire Weekes' last imperitive is of course 'Let time pass'.

[Indigojoe]

Dear Pawannogariya,

I understand exactly what you described about your body and how you feel.

Bravo for being able to accept the feelings. That is advanced work.

Trust your instincts about what direction you believe you need to take at this time.

There is a type of practice called Energy Psychology.

Donna Eden and Dr Darrin Weissman do Energy work.

THey both have

YouTube videos and have written books.

See if either one "speaks" to you at this point in your journey.