Uneasy

Hi everyone I'm feeling rather uneasy this afternoon after a very hard therapy session. I'm sitting in my garden pondering all that was said. My therapist is not one who just sits and listens she gets involved with me,I'm just not sure if its working and she has said a couple go things that have upset me but because I've suffered many many years of abuse I'm not sure whether I'm over reacting so I need an outside opinion. I do find it very hard to open up about what has gone on,I've been seeing her since October. A few weeks ago I opened up and was told I was trying to drive myself insane. This really upset me and I challenged her about it the following week. I didn't really get a satisfactory answer except that she sometimes worded things wrong. She sure did on that occasion. But then I thought maybe I'm just being too hard on her because of what I've been through. Today I started to tentatively talk about something I've hardly talked about and then she threw back at me I was being a victim and being self pitying. I said nothing. But I took it all in. Now I have done a bit of counselling training myself and I'm pretty sure from what I learnt you must not judge your client. I am fully aware I am a victim but I'm very self aware and proactive and I thought counselling was about feeling safe enough to talk about your most private feelings. I let it go the first time but the second time I'm in a real quandary. I doubt myself so much I don't know when someone is doing something they shouldn't.

2 Replies

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  • Hi

    I'm sure your therapist is trying to help you, although what you say does sound she is not the skillfullest person with her words.

    I'd take it on the chin and ask her to explain why she thinks that way about you.

    I know there's a three part idea that seems to work on a cycle, and one part is self pity i.e. victim, not sure on the other two, but I bet she does.

    If it carries on I would ask your liason officer if you can change therapists and explain why.

    I'm seeing a cocky CBT chap at the moment, which I dont like, he is very plain speaking also, but I like that. So I'm not taking anything to personally as I want to get to the bottom of his ideas on coping.

    Hang in there, and hope she's got some decent treatment plan available.

    And ask her why she thinks that way.

    Wishing you well

    B

    xxxx

  • If you don't feel your getting what you need from your therapist it's ok to feel that. A lot of people change therapists. I've been to two therapist both were lovely but me just sitting talking wasn't working for me. So maybe you could look for a different type of therapy or a different therapist. Remember it's ok to change.

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