I’ve been letting life happen for 5 years and I want to take back control!

[Ikn0wimnot4lone]

At the age of 19 I was officially diagnosed with GAD and Moderate Depression. I have been battling with this for the past five years and I can’t seem to get back on the horse (job, relationships, school, etc.). I now live life with what seems like crisis after crisis. Not knowing what I want out of my existence, I constantly make impulsive decisions to pursue career goals and hobbies that I don’t bother with after a week or so. I just want my life back! I’m sick of talking myself out of things because I get so worked up over things to the point where I barely leave the house anymore. I almost had a panic attack thinking about a job interview I scheduled for tomorrow.

Does anyone have any advice on how to find myself underneath the anxiety and depression? I’ve tried mindfulness, therapy, and medication buy none of it seems to have a lasting impact.

[LoveforAll41]

Hi, and welcome. You definitely are not alone. At 23 I was in and out of college every other semester due to my mental health. I finally crapped out and made it through a tech school. I finally was pretty suicidal a couple of years ago and went to an inpatient center. Things have actually been trending up pretty steadily from there. There are so many things to try, ketamine therapy, so so many books, so many therapists, so many drugs. I have had many times where the thought of taking a shower sent my anxiety out of control, because that would mean actually living. It was nuts.

We all have so many thoughts and reasons we are anxious and depressed, know that there is a path to peace for you. I always recommend "Feeling Great" by David Burns. He goes over many thinking errors and heaps of solutions. I wish you peace on your journey.

[Ikn0wimnot4lone in reply to LoveforAll41]

Hello and thank you for your reply. You don’t know how relieved I am to know that what I’ve been going through with the whole school thing is a shared experience. That’s one of my major concerns and seemingly insurmountable challenges. I really appreciate the recommendation. I’ve already added it to my want to read list after skimming the description. I made my best attempt at a tech program but somehow talked myself out of completing it because I didn’t want to attend the zoom meetings. More often than not I’m fighting to maintain interest or keep up with the energies of others which only serves to frustrate me. I’d like to make a go at school again but I keep getting bogged down with intrusive thoughts. Any thoughts or techniques I can use to ease my mind?

[Craigliving4Jane in reply to Ikn0wimnot4lone]

That is great advice from Love4All. Keep researching. Try to find docs with some level of empathy .

Keep trying things until you find the relief you want. With meds the side affects can be daunting but decide how you want to feel and go after it.

I did not follow my advice and i suffered way to long

Much love and luck