I feel like my past traumas and anxiety are taking control

[Ahsenone]

I’ve held in so much during my life, I’ve always dealt with everything on my own. Things will seem really good and then I think I get scared and I explode and lose the important people in my life. I don’t know how to stop this cycle, therapy is so expensive. Where and how do I start healing from the past because I hate this cycle in my life. I’m 34, I need to get a hold on my life.

[mkat13]

I’ve held in a lot throughout my life and my past definitely haunts me. I think about it a lot and I don’t mean to. I’m the same way I’ll do really good for a while and then boom explosion and I tend to push away and shut down when that happens. It is a cycle and it’s very hard to get out of and it still happens every once in a while but not as often as it used to. Therapy is very expensive! We have to learn to let go of the past and everything that has happened we need to keep thinking and moving forward without looking back.

[Ahsenone in reply to mkat13]

Thank you for responding, it’s good to know that I am not alone in feeling this way, I hope to one day brake this cycle....

[EndUser13]

Sharing on here is a great start, there are a lot of helpful, friendly people here!

While I don't know your financial situation there have been times where I got a cheaper therapist (or even a free one) because of my financial 'situation'.

It may be worth your time to talk to a local gov't agency, like Jobs and Family Services, perhaps they could give you some options?

Give yourself some credit for the things you are able to achieve and pass on your flaws, healing from trauma can be a life-long endeavor.

[Ahsenone in reply to EndUser13]

The hard part is I’ve reached out and I just can’t seem to find anything. I was able to find a councillor that I can talk to but it seems like they try to give me tools to help me deal with anxiety but not deal with the issues that have caused it. Sadly I don’t make a lot of money when I comes down to bills and all of life’s expenses but the government doesn’t see it that was. Thank you for your kind words.

[EndUser13 in reply to Ahsenone]

I'm sorry, it's kind of common for health professionals to want to treat the symptom rather than attack the core causes. Keep trying, you never know what you might find

[DodgeDhanda]

Hi Ahsenone firstly welcome to the right place . & may I say ur past can only take over if A) u dwell on it & 2) let it take over.

If u need to talk then talk away & u reveal as much as you want to or not as the case may be. This group is magical & help me to affect change in myself & thats exactly who is the one who does the work .... YOU !!

Therapy is very expensive but here it's free , you let it all go in ur own time & u will find that 1) ur not alone & B) others will offer you some beautiful insights into their own lives & how they dealt with things. In time u will hopefully be able to make the changes u need to once you've learned to work on u & ur relationship with urself & forgiving urself & then learning to love urself & give urself strength from within & then go on to help others in this group who are having similar setbacks .

I wish u positivity & lots of light on ur journey.

[TangledUpIn in reply to DodgeDhanda]

You're so refreshingly positive!

[DodgeDhanda in reply to TangledUpIn]

Thank you Green.I do try to choose my words carefully as what we say is important & the correct wording can let a person know there is light at the end of the tunnel.

[Ahsenone in reply to DodgeDhanda]

Such positive words I’m hoping I can do some healing here through trying reach out, which for me is a big step. I know it’s about changing the way I see myself and accepting myself but it’s so hard. Thank you for the warm welcome, definitely makes me feel like I came to the right place

[KJnOTT]

I am so glad you reached out, we need the support and encouragement of others, particularly when we are struggling. I know what it is like to feel stuck in your situation and feelings, wondering when it is going to turn around. Take it one day at a time, no more than that.

Here is a contact for a free session with a licensed counsellor. They will be able to assist you and maybe provide some local supports in your community - 855-382-5433.

Praying that you find strength, hope and love during this season. Blessing