"That's good for someone who's struggling with mental health"

[MiamiJacket84]

A phrase so many people use thinking they're original, I absolutely hate it. Nothing feels more like pity than hearing that. I hate being patronized or pitted. Oh is that what you think? Well good for you but I doubt my employer/work place/clients/etc would actually give a flying shite. I shouldn't care what they think? No I should because I care about having a job and actually getting an income to you know, live???? It's so stupid. I want to be normal. No one cares about what anyone is dealing with. You're either good enough for a job or you're not. It's so simple and yet people fail to comprehend that. Or maybe they just refuse to because that means getting off their high horse and actually validating how you feel. Mental health is so messed up on both sides. The illness makes you want to die, the healthcare makes you want to die even more and then they stop you and just blame you. Wtf am I supposed to do, just take it? Who can force me? No one, if you believe you can then you're just in denial like most people. The only person who truly deserves to control their own life and death, is themselves. That's it.

[Sunrisetabby]

Good morning, MiamiJacket84. My heartfelt sympathy to you. I had some trouble unraveling your post, but I it clear your are in a tough place. Please consider calling 988 or getting emergency help if you are considering self harm. First, it is helpful to consider that many people are not very smart. By definition half of all people are below average, and that includes many so-called successful people, and in my opinion almost all politicians. Honestly, it is amazing what many/most people strongly believe, despite the fact that it is almost certainly incorrect. Second, many people often don't know what to say and resort to trite and offensive statements that cause harm, despite the fact that they were not trying to cause harm. I think often people aren't intending to cause harm through their comments. So, I try not to pay too much attention to what people are saying to me, and struggle to not get offended when propensity offensive things to me. In terms of what you are supposed to do, or how you are supposed to respond that is your choice. My advice would be to model the type or behavior you had wished you received from them, but also to try not to worry about it. I honestly don't think we have that much control over our own life and death. Some smart people believe they we essentially have no control. For example, the book Free Will by Sam Harris is an interesting read; in short, we have no free will. I almost died by suicide and although I still struggle with depressive thoughts, I am increasingly convinced that if that had happened it would not have been because I had any control, in fact the total opposite, I had lost all control at that time and had tried and tried and tried to get help from our awful medical system and only had gotten extremely poor assistance and often wrong guidance. It is a fight to get better, to get closer to a level of normal functioning in society, but having anger at the systems and people that have helped lead us to darkness, especially if that anger can be used to help ourselves and perhaps even improve the systems and educate these malinformed people.

[MiamiJacket84 in reply to Sunrisetabby]

This is beyond misinformation and a poor system, psychiatry as a concept is flawed at its core. The fact that lobotomies were ever even a thing is enough to prove my point. Unless the entirety of psychiatry changes, I doubt anything about mental healthcare will.

[Sunrisetabby]

I'm surprised they you don't think António Egas Moniz deserved the Nobel prize in 1949 for his discovery and promotion of lobotomies. (Sorry for the cynical sarcasm.) Yes, there have been a lot of diabolical psychiatrists, characters like Moniz, but many of them intended well and society has some of the blame as well for embracing the oracrice. For example, Rosemary Kennedy, who was left incapable of speech and intellectual challenges following a lobotomy, sister to JFK and Ted Kennedy.

Why are you so negative on psychiatry? For me, I think part of my problems and difficulty in getting reasonable care has been the lack of knowledge by my neurologist and primary care physician about psychiatry (and vice-versa). Something that I heard recently from a doctor on a podcast is that he doesn't distinguish between psychological and physical pain because they are both real and attempting to distinguish typically results in a belittling or dehumanizing of the person seeking relief. Psychiatric pain and maladies are real and we need experts that specialize in these problems.

[MiamiJacket84 in reply to Sunrisetabby]

My hate of psychiatric healthcare comes from them basically taking away any serious patient's dignity and right to autonomy. They pretty much say "you don't get to make any decisions, you're too sick to think right". Their first line of treatment is drugging you with so many meds that you become a zombie. Oh you have bad thoughts? Okay we'll take away your ability to think then, that should fix it 👍. In any other branch of medicine, this would be malpractice but in psychiatry, it's the norm. It's what psychiatric healthcare is built on, keeping you alive regardless of your happiness, even if you're nothing but an empty husk.

[Sunrisetabby in reply to MiamiJacket84]

I am truly sorry that has been your experience. If someone is involuntarily committed for inpatient psychiatric care their right to autonomy is largely taken away, but when I was confined to inpatient care I was still able to change psychiatrists when I was not satisfied with their care, and even the psychiatrist I did not like took into consideration my input and desires. The goal of psychiatric care should not be to make people into zombies. Have you been able to change psychiatrists? I have now seen something like 17 different psychiatrists in the past three years. Two have been outstanding, a couple were ok, and about half seemed pretty bad. Only 1 of the 17 was so bad that I pursued a complaint against him and thought he was a danger to patients.

[fauxartist]

Just look at the world around you .... the madness, .... we are the new normal. I find I have to be very selective who I talk to about my depression and mental abuse, because people in general are not good with TMI.