Bullies get great pleasure from those... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Bullies get great pleasure from those who can't or wont answer back.

secrets22 profile image
19 Replies

Having been the brunt of bullying most of my life i am appalled how many people get tremendous joy from putting people down, whether its in personal life or people in the public eye, and if you confront them head on,they try to make you out to be the bad one.

They tend to be weak jealous unfulfilled people with nothing better going on in their lives than to crucify others, and they think its funny.

They try their best to bring you down to their level ,and if you object they will slander you to.

We now live in a society filled with jealousy and envious people, but instead of knocking people down they should learn humility and niceness, for it costs nothing to be nice, and its so rewarding if you can lift someone out of the gloom they may be experiencing ,for then you have gained respect.

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secrets22 profile image
secrets22
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19 Replies
Isinatra profile image
Isinatra

Bullies are sometimes outsiders wanting in. Yes, their motivation can be jealousy. They miss so much of what life has to offer and their world is very small. If they smiled, the world would smile with them.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Isinatra

Jealousy is one of the biggest motivators I think.

❤️🐬

Isinatra profile image
Isinatra in reply to Dolphin14

I agree, that’s a big one. And anger/rage issues. No outlet for their anger and use the vulnerable or who they think are weaker than themselves to use as whipping posts.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Isinatra

True, some do meet their match though. Some attempts are unsuccessful . Not everyone is going to sit back and listen. People can stand up for themselves or go silent.

Vulnerable people are targets and why anyone would attack a vulnerable person upsets me. If they took a step back and looked at the damage they are causing maybe they would refrain from attacking.

Adults know better than this.

Isinatra profile image
Isinatra in reply to Dolphin14

Rational adults know better. Some bullies don’t have the capacity for empathy towards others. And yes, some bullies do face consequences when they underestimate their victim. I’ve been bullied late in life and I was underestimated. Then I had to face their revenge. Quack Quack 🦆.

AnxiousSilver profile image
AnxiousSilver

"Having been the brunt of bullying most of my life i am appalled how many people get tremendous joy from putting people down, whether its in personal life or people in the public eye, and if you confront them head on,they try to make you out to be the bad one."

I was bullied a lot when I was younger.

Bullies don't understand the damage that can do to someone else.

A lot of them (at least from my experience) do it because they came from either broken homes, or had older sibblings that were abusive.

.

Either way, I have zero patience or tolerance for them.

I "try" (key word here is try) my best to live life by the Golden Rule.

AKA.. "Treat others the way that you would want (or hope) to be treated".

Fleure profile image
Fleure

very well said try to keep smiling and doing good

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14

I love that statement... it costs nothing to be nice.... I've always said that. It's the same energy ( if not less) to be kind to someone.

It's so dramatic and so high school. Who needs it

🐬

Isinatra profile image
Isinatra in reply to Dolphin14

Some remain forever in the high school mindset.

My experience with some bullies were in college and always did happen each time that I go into a relationship in college some girls that try to temp guys to cheated they did success and broke up with cheaters. i also ended friendship with some girls since they ruin the trust. one girl tries to force a friendship when i kept saying NO and NO over again. not talking. walk away.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to

It's so hard when you are young and trying to figure life out and people do that to you.

This whole subject always brings to mind a coworker of mine whose daughter is just beginning high school and has been bullied beyond belief. I just don't understand it. I do feel jealousy has something to do with it at a young age.

I'm still perplexed at adults stalking, belittling and tantalizing people. Just go your own way, move on:

I hope these things are not continuing to happen to you.

🐬

in reply to Dolphin14

@ Dolphin14 also went into a special learning disabilities college and happen with one co-worker . some of my bullies were girls throughout college. when I did had previous relationship. girls just got closed to me to ruin my trust by trying to get guys to temp to cheats . apart from i learn i stared to have relationship outside of college and still there was one girls trying to temp guy from different college that I college. i don't really want to trust any women to be friends . also has cyberbullies also .

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. Try and remember people that continue to do this have problems. It's cruel.

Keep your self safe and don't let them take your peace away from you

in reply to Dolphin14

what are good things to learn are do not let some women knew you have a boyfriend . I am single at time now . one dating app Badoo has be working great . finding guys with learning disabilities and i also has some trust isuse and i do has one flaw that is jealous .

Sabbath1 profile image
Sabbath1

When it comes to bullies, just hit them with the "you're mad at your dad not at me I forgive you." Always as a strange effect on them. Most of them are just timid little people with issues stemming from things like that anyways. And now they don't know what to do so they be a bully to feel "power" cause they don't really have any.

And as far as girls tempting your boyfriend to cheat there's a positive way to look at that, if he does it. Now you know he's shifty and ain't worth your time. Same to the dudes who's girls be doing that dirty shit too. And anybody else. Sure it will mess up your trust in people, I know that myself. But then you get rid of all them and it could lead you into much better things.

And as far as the people in the public eye go, unfortunately it goes with the territory, bullies, weirdos, etc .

6ixtyon1 profile image
6ixtyon1

Amen to that...sometimes, I wonder just how far books like "Lord of the Flies" got it all correct...and, that's a scary consideration. Lucky, some of us don't feel that way...LOL, why aren't we ALL living in one secret area, just going about our daily lives, supporting each other, w/the rest of the outside world, none the wiser...? It's a shame technology made the planet that much smaller, darn it!

designguy profile image
designguy

Bullies are weak people trying to hide and cover up their own shame by bullying others. It's really their insecurities and poor self-worth that they try to inflict on others and us but it really has nothing to do with us, we are just their latest target. They were more than likely bullied themselves and haven't yet gained the wisdom to understand what they are really doing, why they are doing it and stop doing it, they are sad individuals.

secrets22 profile image
secrets22 in reply to designguy

Yes its very sad, and they are so cruel to and they have no conscience of the harm they do.

designguy profile image
designguy in reply to secrets22

That's true. What helped me heal my shame and anger from being bullied was realizing that the shame I felt was not mine and that I assumed it was my fault but it wasn't and i didn't know better at the time. The shame was the bully's not mine and they were trying to pass it off on to me. I had also directed some of my anger at myself and when I realized what I was doing I started directing it at the bully and beating the crap out of the pillow while mentally and emotionally focusing on them. I also realized I was suffering from trauma/c-ptsd from the bullying and a crappy childhood and found a therapist that specialized in treating trauma who used emdr as part of the therapy. It was very helpful for processing the emotions and grief and healing.

The other thing is that I was suffering from low-self-esteem and low-self-worth because I was shamed and punished for showing any signs of being proud of myself or trying to stand up for myself. It made me be an easy target for the bully and the bullying helped reinforce the low-self-worth although it was not my fault. The fault was crappy parenting from crappy parents and the bullys. So i've done a lot of healing my self-worth/self-esteem and realized and validated that there never was anything wrong with me, it was my perpetrators fault and who had their own issues trying to inflict them on me.

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