The symptoms of your anxiety disorder are perfectly normal.

[Jeff1943]

Anxiety symptoms can be frightening and people often think something strange and unusual is happening to them.

They couldn't be more wrong. Their mind, body and nervous system are just reacting in perfectly normal and predictable ways to the stress they've been subjected to.

Nerves can withstand months, even years, of worry, over-work and constant anxiety. But eventually they can take no more and start to protest. What's so surprising about that?

At this point your nervous system begins to play up and you can experience panic attacks, agoraphobia, depersonalisation, the feeling that death is imminent, something terrible is going to happen and all the symptoms of health and social anxiety.

All this is the normal response of your body to levels of stress it can tolerate no longer. People hope the bad feelings will go away as quickly as they came: maybe a good night's sleep will do it and everything will go back to normal in the morning. But it doesn't. Days pass into weeks and weeks into months and it's still there.

What's happened is that your nervous system has become over sensitised by too much stress and the fear hormones you generate in reaction to the symptoms maintain your nerves in this sensitive state.

But just as the response to too much over-work and worry is entirely normal and predictable so is the way to recover.

Instead of trying to cure all the terrible symptoms you should focus on the cause: the over sensitisation of your nervous system. If you can stop churning out fear hormones like cortisol and adrenaline every time you get a bad thought or feeling then after a while your nerves begin to recover. And eventually, as sure as eggs are eggs, all the bad symptoms disperse and you will feel normal once again.

More easily said than done. So how do you stop responding to panic attacks, agoraphobia and other symptomd calmly and without fear?

You could go onto anti-anxiety medications which will quickly bring respite. Nothing wrong with that if you've a job to hold down and a family to maintain. But when you stop the medication the old problems usually come back.

Or you could go for one-to-one talking therapy which has brought recovery to many.

Or you could read one of the many self-help recovery books written by people who know what they're talking about. I've heard favourable feedback about a book called 'Dare' though I've never read it myself - and many people have returned to good mental health practicing the Acceptance method described in the books of Claire Weekes.

Do remember: what has happened to you is not some rare and strange affliction. It's a perfectly normal reaction experienced by millions. The answer to your problems lies somewhere in this forum. Search and you will find the road to recovery. Then it's down to you to do something to bring it about through practice and perseverance.

[bergh]

As always sound and practical, tried and tested, just brilliant advice from you Jeff💯👍👏😇Thanks so much for your posts xx

[Sleeplessme]

Awesome post as always my friend. This should be a mandatory first read on this forum!

[guynfl2chat]

Thank you! We may know some of this information, but it is a great reminder that it is all normal and part of our nervous system. Working with it-- instead of against it -- is the best way to manage it. I do this well sometimes, but I revert to my old ways and think the worst of any symptoms that develop. This can be sore muscles, feet, aches, twitching.. or all of the above. Anxiety loves to visit our bodies in different ways and we zap it with coritsol and adrenaline to feed it more.

[twinks]

Thank u

[Morphling]

Hello Jeff , I hope you respond. I have anxiety and I’m in a relationship. It affects so much I believe something is wrong with my relationship ( maybe not the right person although we are together for 2 years now ) I get obsessed with negative thoughts. I feel numbness and this gives me bad feelings in relationship. I wonder whether this thoughts are actually true or not.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Morphling]

Morphling, I have no professional qualifications so it would be hard for me to give any useful advice. But as you have high anxiety, as your presence here indicates, I would think that anxiety could be part of the problem, specially when we consider that anxiety disorder magnifies and normal bad feelings and thoughts by say, ten times.I can only suggest that if you haven't already read it you would gain understanding, reassurance and a path to recovery by reading and applying the self help method set out in Claire Weekes' classic book 'Self help for your nerves'.

[Morphling in reply to Jeff1943]

Thank you , I will read this book hope it helps.

[Beautifullybroken38]

Thank you for this. I was in an abusive marriage for many years. I'm 3 years out, and in the last 3 years I have become worse mentally then I was while I was with him. I have terrible anxiety that affects every aspect of my daily life, even when I don't realize its anxiety. I constantly have those bad thoughts and bad feelings. I constantly Feel like and worry something bad is going to happen. I worry about my health and every little thing that cones up Im convinced I'm dying. I've never struggled on this level before. I have been through a lot if trauma in my life, but it's like everything has exacerbated since the divorce. Now I'm scared to live and scared to die. I sort of just exist. The only thing I can conclude is that all.those years my brain was protecting me from reality, so I could survive and protect my child. Its like I was frozen and have been thawing for the last 3 years and as I'm thawing I'm getting worse. Its extremely discouraging.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Beautifullybroken38]

Ginger38, you have had a hard time one way and another, bringing up your child despite having an abusive husband was a great achievement. It's no wonder your nervous system has become sensitised, the trouble is that it can remain sensitised even though the cause of your difficulties has passed.

First give yourself a pat on the back for protecting your child. Second, do not lose sight of the fact that you are not to blame for anything, you are a victim not an aggressor. Third, recognise there are paths to full recovery but these require effort and persistence.

May I draw your attention to the self-help book by Claire Weekes that I mention to Morphling in this thread. It is easy to read, fully understands how readers feel and contains a step-by-step course of action that will desensitise your nerves and allow you to regain your quiet mind.

Weekes' book was published in the u.k. as "Self help for your nerves" and in the u.s. as "Hope and help for your nerves". It's available for just a few pounds/dollars on Ebay and Amazon new or pre-owned.

I commend this book that has helped millions to escape from the shadow of high anxiety.

[Beautifullybroken38 in reply to Jeff1943]

Thank you 🙏