Can’t move on stuck in self absorbed hell

[repeatOffender]

Saw a picture of my wife and kids from 6 years ago. When I was very happy and living in a different city and had a good job

Now in a different place and a menial job and I’ve been depressed for 3 years

The picture made me so sad

I feel my life has been shattered

I know I should just cherish the memory but my mind spins out of control with regret and remorse and that leads to anxiety and depression

I’ve been a real mess for 3 years

Feels like I’ll never pull out and have a happy time again

Still living with my family but it’s not good for than to have someone always depressed around

I’m taking medication and in therapy

But my mind seems so stubborn

It will not let go and not forgive myself for mistakes and accept what is and move on

I try letting the thoughts pass without engaging them but the come constantly

I must get some short term pleasure from following them

Long term it is toxic

Life is passing me by and I am miserable

I know so many in the works have real and pressing problems and I should be grateful for my wonderful wife and great kids and a job

But I am stuck in this self absorbed hell

Any advice

[abryans]

It sounds like you are working so hard to not complain and to feel like you are responsible for changing your feelings. I bet you are doing the best you can. I wish you could leave yourself alone for a bit and know you are enough. If only it were that easy- but, just for a few minutes know that you are enough.