Anyone have a similar experience?

[Serae292]

I have no real friends I would consider close. It’s not for the lack of trying. In fact I find myself going over the top trying to be nice but I think it must come across as desperate. I feel people see it as a weakness and either it is just ends up being a one way street or I feel they begin to take advantage of me. When I do start to feel that way obviously I begin to feel disrespected which turns into anger then depression, and then begin to question if it is just me being overly paranoid. I feel like there must be something wrong with me. I eventually talk myself into trying again but end up constantly being disappointed. I feel lucky I have a husband but he is not the type to sit and really listen to my feelings-whenever I bring things up he just tells me to go talk to a counselor.

[Emel1]

Hi there, I know exactly how you feel, I don't have anyone to really turn to. I wish I had the answer for you to make things better. If you want to chat on Healthunlocked there is always someone here. Not the same as sitting down in a cafe passing the time but here if it helps.

[hypercat54]

Hi I wonder if you have ever properly learned the social skills necessary to make friends. It is supprisingly common and not a fault in you at all. I was the same but taught myself by watching and listening to how people interact, especially the popular people. Try this.

It will take some time but try and work out what you do which isn't effective and what others do that is. I also suspect you are a 'people pleaser' in which you have been taught to put others feelings over your own? Again this is very common.

Counselling might be a good option so have you considered this?

[samack]

Don't try so hard. Not everyone will be responsive to opening of friendship. I have experienced that some folks are genuinely too busy and other times may feel incompatible for other reasons. Just let things flow naturally and don't make yourself in a one down position. Its hard for us to do when we're suffering unfortunately.

[Roxylox]

I have experienced the same. At work if I was trying to get to know someone I must have come across as desperate. I was only making conversation, yet I heard someone say I would latch onto anyone.

I am always being misjudged and my confidence takes a bashing.

I am wary of people now. I find it easier to engage through the written word like on here. I can't advise, I just know the feeling.