My friends and family expect me to be successful and happy its too much pressure and im failing

[Jackdaniels12]

I failed my first uni semester exams and i fear i will fail this semester exams too bc of my lack of motivation

[rockstocks99]

It's important to know yourself and what makes you happy. I had a friend who went to medical school because his dad was a doctor and they encouraged him to go. But he was miserable and dropped out. He studied, instead, to be a teacher and taught elementary school for like 33 years and was very happy. If others don't respect your choices(college may not be for you right now)--take a break and think on it, work a job in the meantime. I know the feeling because I came from an upper middle class family and all my parents' friends were wealthy, had big houses, etc. My relatives too. So, I know the pressure. I joined the Army without telling anyone at first. Later, I went to college, and now am a teacher. Not quite the "high life" wishes of my folks, but had to control my own destiny. That's important. Don't cave in to conditional love. Go with your heart. Good luck!

[Hidden in reply to rockstocks99]

THIS!!! Love this!! I went the other route: I kept failing and kept striving to meet my parents’ overwhelming expectations. Never daring to disappoint, I failed classes and eventually passed and felt like I was being dragged through life. I hated college. In retrospect, I have many regrets. I deeply regret not trusting my own intuition and instincts about what was right for me. I knew. I totally knew. No one knows better than you who you are. I deeply regret not saying “no” to the expectations. I should’ve been a writing/English major at a smaller school. I should’ve taken a break year. I know it in my heart. But they insisted on a science degree. They insisted I not take a break. They mocked my choices and pushed me.

When you say no to your parents, and when you say, “I want to do X instead of Y,” and when you say, “I’m going to disappoint you and I’m willing to live with the consequences,” that’s the beginning of becoming an adult. Says me. In my 40s. Still working on it. Maybe listen to rockstocks99.😀

[ShakeyD in reply to Hidden]

Good for you.

[ShakeyD in reply to rockstocks99]

My hats off to you. Well done.

[froggymom88]

What do you want for yourself? You will not succeed trying to fill others' goals for you. Pray about what you want to do and then with love let your goals be known to family and friends. I will be praying for you.