Difference between thought and action

[RewiringHeadspace]

I have long struggled between the thought of the task I need to do and actually doing it. As if there is some mental disconnect. Like no matter how much I think about a task, plan it out in my head, visualize myself doing it, or set alarms to then go do it, something goes off track to actually then go do it. This happens for all sorts of tasks for household chores or work (which is a bigger problem for not getting those tasks done).

I’ve really tried to analyze why I might do this. I think when it comes to some tasks for work, perhaps sometimes it’s fear (which I’ve allowed to rule my life) or resignation that things I do don’t work or I can’t ever seem to fix or make right. But when it comes to household chores or more minor work tasks I’m not sure as to why I’m like that.

Does anybody else experience this or can relate to this? I’ve been told that this is common among those who experience depression and anxiety. But I fail to understand the reason for this disconnect or how to overcome it. It has becoming a paralyzing problem over the years.

[hypercat54]

Yes I get that as I am (was?) the same. When I was younger my home would get into a terrible state then I would have a mass clean up. As I have got much older now I don't have the energy to do that so let it get again in a horrible state where it remained for years.

I had a leak in my bathroom which I couldn't deal with as couldn't invite anyone in. By the time it was clean again the leak had got much worse and cost me a lot more money.

What I did was ask a friend who was an out of work cleaner to do it for me and I paid her well. She transformed my home and every nasty corner (every one was) and scrubbed years of dirt away. Now I have a dread of returning to those days and make myself keep on top of the everyday tasks. I might have to pay someone to do the harder jobs such as vacuuming though as I find this too much.

I have learnt a few tricks - when I am cooking food I clean round the area and wash up as I am already on my feet. I also spent a fortune on a new bathroom suite so that motivates me to clean it.

Most of all though I learnt something which seems obvious but not to me at the time. The purpose of cleaning something is to clean it not when it is dirty but already clean. This way it stays clean. I would get a friend to help you as I found this motivating.

Good luck.

[b1b1b1 in reply to hypercat54]

Yes, my house tends to be quite messy (dirty). I have been trying to get rid of a lot of junk in the 2 years since my husband died. I know some people would have had this done within a few months and things ship shape by then. The house tends to look like I am just moving in - boxes etc. everywhere. It's very difficult to just get at it and I do little bits at a time which doesn't make any visible difference.

[Hidden]

Hi Rewiring Headspace, Yes. Part of my procrastination is perfectionism. If I don’t think I can do something perfectly, I won’t bother with it at all. Another part of my procrastination is lack of self-care in general. Thirdly, there are so many distractions, it’s too easy to get off task. Finally, there are those rare instances where procrastination pays off: where you don’t do something & that turns out to be the best course of action in hindsight. Intermittent reinforcement. You’re not alone.

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

Yes I am aware that it's part of self care too and I am quite bad at that in general. I am not one to repeat past mistakes when they teach me as big a lesson as the last one has hopefully. It's great to be able to invite friends in etc.

[lifted]

I suffer bipolar and depression my house is untidy , yet I will go down stairs watch tv and ignore the house work .this is not me and I'm in tears , but even if I plan and break things down I always go and sit down and put tv . It really does upset me

[BtaoZ]

I am actually having the procrastination problem right now. I just joined this community to try and get a little reprieve from my depression so I can get something done. Sorry not really any helpful advice, just know you aren't alone.