Breaking bad habits is haaaaard work.... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Breaking bad habits is haaaaard work. anyone else ?

Starrlight profile image
53 Replies

I have had many bad habits and I’m breaking one after another. I feel like I can’t stop everything though. I quit drinking and it’s been almost 2 months now. I’m in the process of stopping buying things I tell myself I need but I know it’s too much. I’m also trying to spend less time on my phone. But I neeeed my movies! I am trying to not eat so I can loose weight, I’m just drinking healthy protein shakes and vegetable based drinks.

I’ve started reading and am part of a book club and I’ve added weights to my exercise routine. I’ve started painting and drawing after years of no art.

Anyone else quitting bad habits and replacing them with healthier activities? Maybe we can motivate each other.

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Starrlight profile image
Starrlight
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53 Replies
Florida1959 profile image
Florida1959

Sounds like you are doing an amazing job xxx

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toFlorida1959

Hiya Florida! Thanks!

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Very interesting, Faux. Thanks! I think I have unresolved issues that I’m hopefully able to understand more about and do something about it if I need to. Sometimes it’s hard to see what’s right in front of us.

Sounds like a great idea, Starrlight! First of all, I really want to commend you on your almost 2 months of sobriety!!!! The other things are awesome too!!!!Let's see... I have also been doing better on the shopping front. Buying something just means yet another thing to give away or get rid of when you're done with it, is how I'm looking at it now. My husband and I are making it a goal to eat healthier and, while we do have our setbacks, it is going very well overall. He makes this really easy and scrumptious recipe where he puts chicken breast and veggies in foil and cooks it. We each get a foil to add things too He adds pineapple chunks to mine and it is oh so good. It is quick too.

That's great news about the book club! Do you all meet on Zoom? What book are you reading?

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

That’s great that you two are eating healthy together. I think when we have company it motivates more than alone.

We are reading A New Earth by Eckhart tolls. It has to do with the ego and awakening to now and to your life’s purpose

in reply toStarrlight

Definitely!Your book sounds interesting! I'll have to look it up. Do you enjoy your group?

Noquarter profile image
Noquarter

Well I quit smoking 11 years ago and I feel that if that’s the only good thing I’ve done for myself it’s enough. I still have alcohol issues though. So I know how it can control your life. Congratulations on your sobriety.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toNoquarter

Oh wow yeah good for you because that is a tough one! I quit smoking too in 2015 and it was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I quit before that for my pregnancies which was kind of hard but the last time I quit for me. Great job Noquarter. Thanks, alcohol did control me. I rarely got drunk but I was not all there ya know?

Noquarter profile image
Noquarter

Yeah quitting smoking was a really hard one but once I put my mind there it didn’t have a chance. Hahaha. So I know I can do whatever I want for myself but I guess it’s about giving up things that afford me happiness. Because there doesn’t seem to be an abundance of that.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toNoquarter

That makes sense yeah definitely. The habits made me happy yet guilty feeling. Now that I’m happier in myself and more peaceful I’m slowly letting go of or using in moderation some of the things which I used to make me happyish

Rewatds? Substitutes ?

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Good ideas Brig! I think the results are rewards in themselves and substitutes yeah there should be substitutes, my substitutes maybe are hanging out with my family and dog more and exercising more

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234

I can’t stop pulling my nose hairs out .🤷🏻‍♂️😄🙃

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSillysausage234

🙃, it’s called Trichotillomania

How are ya?

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234

Oh wow didn’t know it was a Real thing ....makes me sneeze 🤧 clears my sinuses ....I’m ok thank you starr hope you are too well done on stopping drinking ,hope you keep going ...on a serious note I’m 9 years clean from opiate addiction and about 4 from smoking cigarettes ....just sit here pulling hairs out now 😊

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSillysausage234

That’s AWESOME haha well the nose hair pulling is obviously awesome... but yeah 9 years is really to be proud of ... did you find it harder to get off of opiates or to stop smoking?

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply toStarrlight

Opiates and methadone was a long thing many fails along the way ....it was my crutch though for years ....smoking was hard I didn’t have any choice I kept smoking them until I choked on them literally 😄

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSillysausage234

Wow well what do you think helped you to kick the opiates and methadone? You don’t have to tell me, I’m just curious.

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply toStarrlight

Just had enough the penny dropped...made a complete lifestyle change and moved to the countryside away from any temptation.....I don’t miss it now ...don’t like being drowsy anymore

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply toSillysausage234

Proud of You :) xx

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply toAgora1

I’m proud of you too 😊x

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSillysausage234

Cool. I live the country vs. city but I live in a city right next to D.C., so very busy area. My meds make me drowsy but I’ll take them for now. Are you on any meds? You seem to be doing well.

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply toStarrlight

No meds now as such...tried lots of anti depressants.. I’ve just accepted my situation and try to just appreciate the good days when they come along and write off the bad ones not dwell on them suppose...i was never a big drinker always made me throw up ... but it’s sociably accepted and you can buy it anywhere must be hard to avoid I imagine.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSillysausage234

Nope for some reason I rarely even think of alcohol now. My husband who drinks like maybe once a year got some beers recently and they sit there in the fridge I have no interest in them, I hate alcohol for how it messed with me... and I don’t go out much so not much social pressure so far...

I’m really happy for you that you are in that place, as it sounds like a decent place to be in.

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply toStarrlight

Thanks I’m at peace with my mind 🤪😄...I have given up the quest for the magic pill regarding anxiety / depression....only thing ever worked was benzos ,the doctors hardly prescribe them here nowadays except short courses of low dose .....well done for leaving the beers in the fridge.....nature is where it’s all at ....have you seen anymore fox cubs ?

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSillysausage234

Nature IS where it’s at! No fox cubs for a long time now but there’s been some type of large hawk visiting our backyard trees. I am in awe of it. What type of critters do you see in your area?

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply toStarrlight

Not a lot really ....do see buzzards close up they are awesome .....I’ve had a heron here the past few days trying to catch my fish ....it’s getting really bold must be getting hungry as it’s gone really cold .....had a deer in the garden eating the grass when it was the first lockdown as there was no traffic about it wandered in that was good ....we don’t have the stuff you guys do over there ...cougars and bears would love that

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSillysausage234

Deer are so nice to have visit. I see some at a park nearby if it’s early enough. Yes buzzards are awesome. Big birds fascinate me; to see them glide across the sky... ive never seen a cougar but in Maine I used to live there are moose and black bears.

I have found codependents online of help - same strategy used by the quit drinking/drugging organizations...

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Niiiice Wallowa thanks for sharing that!

Reading_Rando profile image
Reading_Rando

You sound like your doing pretty well! Could you share how you motivate yourself to exercise? I personally didnt have too much trouble improving my diet and I lost some weight as a result but I find it almost impossible to get my myself motivated to exercise.

P.S. A good healthy actvivity that I started doing and that pretty much anyone can can do these days is to study a language. With apps like Duolingo its pretty easy and costs virtually nothing. You'll also feel really good about yourself when you feel like your making progress towards something.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toReading_Rando

I’ve never been good at languages but you go for it!I wish I had more motivation for that! What language are you learning?

So to get exercise done I loved running so it helps if you choose carefully like choose something that you like alright don’t force yourself to do what you hate most...but since I’ve gained weight i feel like it’s too much to run it just sucks right now so I walk and what motivates me is doing it with someone like my kids and we will jump on the trampoline together... also I watch a movie or listen to music while I lift weights and do floor exercises.

I think what motivates me the most is I keep picturing what my body will feel like and look like when I’ve lost weight.

Reading_Rando profile image
Reading_Rando in reply toStarrlight

The only physical activity I really enjoy is outdoors type stuff like hiking or backpacking, things I just cant do casually. I do walk, I just dont do it enough. I do like your idea of tieing physical activity to something else that's entertaining. Maybe I can tell myself I can't watch movies (which I also love) unless I lift too. Thanks!

As for language I'm studying Japanese. It's a hard language to start but once you give up on being perfect and just go at at steady pace it becomes pretty relaxing.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toReading_Rando

Hiking is my fav too. Wow I admire that you are learning Japanese! Best to you!

Marysblue profile image
Marysblue

Wow, way to go.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMarysblue

❤️

Good job!! 😁

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

❤️

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003

I agree with you I still need to learn to stop saying sorry too much

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toHb2003

Best to you

Matthew28 profile image
Matthew28

I stopped drinking three weeks ago. I have cut down my online spending too. I know those were empty activities to temporarily numb my depression. But I can’t break all the negative thoughts and bad feelings. I hope eventually stopping bad habits will make me feel good enough about myself to stop my negative inner voice.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMatthew28

I could have written that. That’s exactly how I feel. We can give ourselves credit. We deserve it. I think those inner bad thoughts about ourselves developed when we were young and are engraved into us but I do believe we can retrain our brains. Best to us!

Matthew28 profile image
Matthew28 in reply toStarrlight

I hope so. If so, it takes a lot of work. But gotta start somewhere.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMatthew28

True we can do it

Reading_Rando profile image
Reading_Rando in reply toMatthew28

You've already done something very difficult and you deserve to feel good about it. 👍

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toReading_Rando

😊 thanks so much! How are you doing?

Matthew28 profile image
Matthew28 in reply toReading_Rando

Thank you.

newbie1956 profile image
newbie1956

Hi Starr,

Bad habits are like a warm bed on a cold day: easy to get into and hard to get out of! But trying to reach all your goals at the same time is a sure way to reach none of them! There's a popular notion that it takes 21 days to cement a new habit. In reality, though, research shows that it can take some people less time—and others a lot more—to make significant changes.

We commend you for the progress you've made.

Praying about our bad habits also helps because GOD is an unlimited source of power we may lack.

As always, Agape :)

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Thanks! I am reaching them all because I believe I can.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Good for you, that’s so great that you were able to save yourself... I keep falling into trap after trap and digging myself out it’s exhausting

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

What do you like? The work disease? Because it acts like one... sorry, didn’t understand that part...

anyway I am confidant I won’t go back to drinking because something huge changed in me I didn’t even hit a rock bottom and it’s like the cigarettes I left and the opioids I left, it’s just not a part of who I choose to be in life anymore. I pray my meds keep working.

Do you ever feel urges to go back to your vices?

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Oh yeah that makes sense. Yes it is what has to be treated. What’s quaaludes? Oh a sedative hypnotic (I just looked it up)

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Interesting. When I was growing up in 80s and 90s LSD was big and weed. I was never into them. I was more into sports but I did experiment a tad. Alcohol was my main thing I’d use then I wondered why the hell people smoked and I was curious so I tried that. Nowadays it’s teas for me. Calming teas and caffine sometimes even just teas can really mess with your mood. Do you take or do anything nowadays to use to get you through?

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