Friends after “break up”?

[kbaum11]

My best friend of like 6 years and I sorta tried “dating” (never were officially gf/bf tho) on and off for the past few years. Turns out he was also trying the same thing with our other friend all behind my back for like two years. After I found out what happened, I have been super angry but tried to like keep things good with my friend. But even after causing me all this hurt and breaking my trust and confirming that now I am the only girl he is dating or whatever, he STILL won’t commit to gf/bf. So I ended things. It has been really shitty and both my depression and anxiety have been really bad. But I feel like I’m handling it okay. But my main question is, do any of y’all have experience being friends after a “break up”? I use quotes since we never officially dated. Also, I want to emphasize how good of friends we were before all this. It isn’t the same as trying to be friends with an ex that you were never friends to begin with.

Wow sorry such a long explanation but any and all advice is welcome!!

[Hidden]

There’s was only one guy I could think of and it was only because it was a mutual agreement, that we’d both be better off as friends.

I think that you really care about this friend and emphasize that you guys had a strong bond before trying to date, but from my understanding you didn’t feel like he reciprocated efforts to build something more intimate and exclusive, something you felt like you deserved so when he was not offering that it broke your heart?

If you can forgive him for trying things out with someone else, and move forward with the friendship I would encourage that. The main question to ask yourself would be, knowing your current state of mind, would you be able to continue a healthy friendship with him?

[kbaum11 in reply to Hidden]

Ah yes you described it perfectly haha. I’m just uncertain about the friendship part like what that would look like now after everything that’s happened 🙃 but I know the feelings I had aren’t gone yet so I’m not ready to be just friends yet. Which sucks cause our friendship is what I miss the most!!