f in the chat

[roachkid]

im new here lovelies and a little manic rn so i found this resource in an extensive interweb surfing adventure. lots of cute fanart of the show community bookmarked

anyway

it's 2:25 a.m. and its hard to think. i suppose thats what i wanted- wear my brain down, slow cognitive function, quiet the racing mania that plagues my ability to process reality without getting overwhelmed.... the regularly scheduled existencial crisis has effectively been subverted into the tamer 'sad boy hours'.

for those who hyperfixate, how do you cope in the loss of that interest??

for those who struggle to pace your thoughts, how do you settle enough to comfortably rest? i usually have to wait until the physical exhaustion outweighs the hyper activity.

took me over ten minutes to write this lmao... @:$!....

[pinkclover]

I wish I had answers for your thoughts and questions. I have a lot of the same problems but no one around me fully gets me

[roachkid in reply to pinkclover]

i dont think its even possible to fully 'get' someone but i have to think you count for something. ty for replying- atleast we're a little less alone

[pinkclover in reply to roachkid]

I want to be normal. I want to be all that I appear to be. To be loved the way I love. To stop the endless thoughts of what could or would happen.

[roachkid in reply to pinkclover]

what is normal anyway.. i still dont know. being happy? being conformitive? being boring? i guess for me normal is 'stable enough' and not on the edge of mental decline at any small inconvenience

[pinkclover in reply to roachkid]

How do you do it. Maybe your youth is on your side. There are so many ways your life can play out. You are on the verge of a new life. Try to go as many places and see as many ways of life as possible.

[roachkid in reply to pinkclover]

i really really would love to but sometimes it feels like the biggest 'adventure' i can handle is getting out of bed or actually getting some sunshine. my parents are really controlling so they cut me off from the best friends ive ever had- and they used to be my adventures. the one good thing about being stuck in place is that i know ill live to the fullest and farthest away once i have the chance. the worst part is feeling like youll be hopelessly stuck forever