Need help...

[amberbily]

I’m trying so hard to get past this difficult time, but no matter how hard I try or what I do I’m still can’t seem to find a way to deal with this depression and anxiety.

[Blackdog1]

I'm struggling too. Is it something specific that has triggered this feeling or do you want to talk about it?

[amberbily in reply to Blackdog1]

I honestly don’t know if there’s a specific trigger. I’ve been dealing with highs and lows for so many years. However, after Christmas it seemed to get worse. Then of course, COVID came along, and I got furloughed. Since I’ve gotten furloughed I’ve been working with a therapist weekly. I’ve been doing lots of meditation different exercises to see which helps best, I’m following a Penn Mental Health cd program, another program called Sanvello, reading the book the disease to please and journaling. Of course, I see a psychiatrist for medication monitoring. I’m recalling having a hard time carving out time to do these things, because I feel guilty I’m not following my “to do list”. I shouldn’t feel that way. I’m a good person and it’s like I’m afraid to be alone with myself because my mind goes in all sorts of directions. I’m just having a really difficult time and am venting. Thanks for asking and listening. I’m going to listen to my YouTube guided sleep meditation and hopefully get a good nights sleep.

[Blackdog1 in reply to amberbily]

I hope your guided meditation goes well. Like yourself, I have lost work and am grateful to have part-time work which is keeping my mortgage paid. I do really love the work but it can be really stressful due to a language barrier.

I hope you have a good evening!

[L1994 in reply to amberbily]

You sound so much like me j have also been furlough Ed and I think mine ends in 2 week and I don't know if I can go back. Wether it will do me good because my anxiety is through the roof causing me havack. This meditation that you are doing could I have some information. I am currently using sleep hypnosis and guided meditation but these are the Michael sealey ones on YouTube. Do you find anything that works? X

[amberbily in reply to L1994]

I’m nervous about going back too. But my thought is I was better when I was working, even through I was having a difficult time. Going to work I felt like I mattered and was productive. They are the ones I use, also Jason Stephenson and John Mason. Sometimes they help, other times they don’t. I also use a PennMed program, my therapist suggested. I’ll have to get the link and send it to you. So far I’ve done breathing meditation and I’ve been trying to get through the body scanning , however been unsuccessful.

I just asked my husband what should we do today. He said he had a bad night and is going to nap until 12-1. I told him then don’t expect me to get out of bed, it’s now or never. All week long I have to be happy and on point, because I stay with my elderly parents and I try to hid my issues and fight back. If he can’t help me on the weekends I don’t give a crap.

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Hey we’re all struggling here and we are all here to support one another! WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS TOGETHER! just take one day at a time. Focus on the present. Not the past or the future! Trust me it gets better I can promise you that ❤️