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Anyone there?

nicetry profile image
58 Replies

Hi. I left a post about 14 hrs ago about my second week of ECT, crying, Thanksgiving, etc. is anyone out there? I’m sorry I’m so needy I’m just feeling so alone and sad.

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nicetry profile image
nicetry
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58 Replies
SSMA profile image
SSMA

Hi Nicetry. Please don't let anyone tell you you are needy. You are not.

It's a hard time you are going through. I hope you get through this. Please remember to keep breathing. Something helped you realise and get help, keep that in mind and keep going. One day at a time. It's okay. It is absolutely fine. Your timelines are your own.

A few years ago, I broke down because i couldn't celebrate festivals/holidays the way I wanted to. My life and health didn't allow. I was too harsh on myself and circumstances. But once I picked my threads, the way you are doing right now, I am sure pretty soon you will have reasons to be grateful and happy about. Please hang in there.

It's way past midnight and I am.not able to get sleep myself, but I remember the day I decided I'll not let my mind tell me otherwise. If not immediately, I'll get some sleep. You will be better too.

Please feel safe. Please remember to love yourself.

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to SSMA

Thank you.

SSMA profile image
SSMA in reply to nicetry

Hope you are feeling better. Sending love right across the oceans. Love, light and hugs. Feel better. Feel free to chat/reach out and ping us.

Never EVER feel guilty for reaching out. YOU are a star for going through and you'll definitely see light at the end of the tunnel.

Love and love.

Annabelle61 profile image
Annabelle61

Nicetry I feel for you ! You are not needy just in need of some help right now - even with people around us we can feel alone . Do you have a dr or therapist you can reach out to also ? I’m wishing you peace - the holidays are a hard time for many - myself included ❤️

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Annabelle61

Yes I have a therapist, Annabelle. I also have the world’s best husband who literally keeps me alive. And I’m so grateful for all of you here who truly understand. I wish you peace as well.

pandaeyes1 profile image
pandaeyes1

I’m sorry love. Let me know if you need to chat!

Coloradowalker profile image
Coloradowalker

I’m here❤️

Hope1410 profile image
Hope1410

You are not alone. I have a local support group I attend weekly in my town. Have you checked if you have any in your town?

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Hope1410

I will check, that’s an idea. Thank you.

Hi there. Sorry missed post earlier. Can i do anything? Pm me back.

quitter333 profile image
quitter333

read your post.

well, you should address these problems. I feel memory loss bothers you most (though it is more loss of concentration, as you clearly remembered doing poses, just skipped the part that you should change them).

Never heard much about ECT. Then again many "self medications" involve a lot of same and worse effects. E.g. alcohol induces serious loss of memory if used too long.

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to quitter333

You’re right, I think it is loss of concentration. It’s like I have too many thoughts stuffed in my head at one time. Short term memory loss is one of the things my doc warned me about when I started ECT. “Self-medicating” runs in my family so no alcohol for me. Ever:

NWGal profile image
NWGal

Sorry sweetie, I was not on the computer the past day or so. I know this is a rough time right now. We are all here for you!

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to NWGal

I know and I SO appreciate that fact.

Coloradowalker profile image
Coloradowalker

Nicetry.... how are you feeling now??❤️

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Coloradowalker

I took a Valium & slept for awhile, then showered & am sitting on the couch with my little black cat 🐱 So I’m better than I was, but still a tad shaky. Thanks for asking

Oshgosh profile image
Oshgosh

Sometimes intakes a few treatments to get a noticeable give yourself a big hug.

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty

I hope you’re feeling better now. I’m sorry I wasn’t available.

Sending you love and hugs my friend💛

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to NeuronerdDoaty

Thanks Neuronerd. I’m a bit better now, a little shaky but hanging in. ❤️

Booklover0219 profile image
Booklover0219

I’m so sorry you are feeling alone and sad. It makes me feel sad that you and so many others feel this way. We are here to listen so please don’t get discouraged. I hope you feel better soon.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3

That's ok, there are going to be time's when you won't get a response, it's happened to me. I just vent with No expectations. Are you still in counciling?

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Want2BHappy3

Thank you all SO MUCH. Can’t tell you how much it means that so many of you stepped up for someone you don’t even know that well. ❤️

ashish0007 profile image
ashish0007

what changes we feel after ECT ? can it remove brain neck muscle pain ( due to anxiety neurosis) wtsspp +91 9898510984

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to ashish0007

No, it doesn’t do anything for muscle pain. I myself have a bad back since birth and neck pain due to a bad car accident 15 yrs ago. I haven’t felt anything getting worse or better in that regard. ECT does however leave you with quite a headache.

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to nicetry

Have you tried a pain management doctor? Don’t know if you have such a specialty there. I see a fantastic guy here in the States who specializes in treating neck and back pain.

abc30 profile image
abc30

You are right, we all are alone. Few words here help no one. We still have no friends, nobody to talk, still we are sad, even we are here, on this platform. We try to support each other here, but few words doesn't help. Next day we are sad again, we are alone again. What is the solution? I didn't find one. I fight with my life trying to survive. That's all I do.

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to abc30

I have found more relief on this platform than I thought possible. There is a solution. You and I just haven’t found it yet. At least that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. (((Hugs)))

abc30 profile image
abc30 in reply to nicetry

It,s great that you foud help here, I didn't found it, nobody talked to me

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to abc30

I will talk.

abc30 profile image
abc30 in reply to nicetry

Thank you for your kind thoughts, we both need some relief, but it's difficult to find it in this word

lizbeth_v profile image
lizbeth_v

We are all here for you! Feel free to message me whenever you need! Xoxox

Oshgosh profile image
Oshgosh

Sorry, I meant to say sometimes it takes a few treatments to get a noticeable effect.

I hope you’re feeling ok.

If you’re getting forgetful,lack of concentration etc, get a notepad and pen and write EVERYTHING down.its a pain,but stick with it.

Don’t worry about lack of initial replies. Sometimes I’ve poured my heart out - no reply.

It’s just depends who’s about on the forum.stay strong

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Oshgosh

Thanks for the tips, Oshgosh. I think it will come in especially handy if my doc decides to try bipolar instead of unipolar ECT.

Oshgosh profile image
Oshgosh in reply to Oshgosh

Hope everything works for you

I’m very sorry I’m used to getting rejected or punished for caring

It’s ok when women carecbutbwhen men do people say wxarecfull of it no matter how sincere sonseckeep to ourselves

I’m very sorry ur alone

Truly welcome to the community

Please tell us about yurself orcsnythjng

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to

Brig57, unfortunately I think you’re right that men have a tougher time in our society. I’m not a man, that’s just my observation. ... I live in US but happen to have lots of family in the UK (Yorkshire and in Ireland). I’m an exercise physiologist so fortunately I can work part time. My husband is the main breadwinner. I was diagnosed with depression at age 16, and in the 30 yrs since have attempted suicide twice & was hospitalized both times; taken practically every med known to man, and am now receiving ECT treatments. Been in therapy the entire time.

There have certainly been ups and downs as I navigate through depressive episodes — I’ve been in the depths of an episode now for longer than I can remember. It’s very hard to push through the day.

in reply to nicetry

Yur field is fascinating I’m so sorry depression has stolen thejoy and quality of yurexperience I lack the words but perhaps u get the message ur condition so unfair to a fine person people suffer so much from theseckndition itvis horriblybunfairv and what can they do but endurecthecveryvreal painduring theceoisides. Sobsirry

Dadzo profile image
Dadzo

I too had problems with allowing myself to feel good on holidays and would sabotage with health anxiety. Ego is what gets in our way. It’s the part of our brain that puts all the chatter in: things are bad, I might be sick, no one loves me, etc... Do some deep breathing and repeat a positive mantra. Talk to that voice in your brain and let it know You are the one in control, not it and it’s negative thoughts and worst case scenarios. Most importantly never stop writing and asking for support. Even the toughest people nowadays ( NFL AND NHL players) are speaking out about their mental problems. Don’t ever feel guilty about speaking out for yours

Dolphin80 profile image
Dolphin80

I’m here. Are u ok??

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Dolphin80

Hi Dolphin80. I’m ok. It’s morning where I am so I’m drinking coffee and checking email, prepping to go grocery shopping 🤯... I cried earlier this morning.

Dolphin80 profile image
Dolphin80

You didn’t like results from ECT?

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Dolphin80

My doc says it’s too soon to tell. I’ve only had three treatments. He said if I don’t notice improvement after 5 or 6 he’d want to try bipolar treatments, for which they put sensors on both sides of the head instead of just one. Supposed to be more effective but also carries greater risk of memory loss. Sometimes I feel so bad I don’t really care.

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Dolphin80

So far I’ve been underwhelmed but this morning the doc said we should consider going to bipolar (I’ve had four unipolar treatments so far & every time it seems I get home and cry and cry. But I’m willing to reserve judgement until we try all avenues.

Hi Nice...I saw ur post a few moments ago..are you near any family..have a close friend..a pastor you can call? I am in the pit at times and feel so alone..lonely and have noone that I can trust with my honest thoughts..so I take a piece of paper and with every thought in my head I write a letter to God in dashes. __ __ until I exhaust myself. Sometimes I cry thru it. I do feel better because I know God hears my thoughts..He alone can so its powerful.

I can lift you up thru my day that God give you a desire to seek him and trust him.

I am happy to write back and forth if you would feel it could help you.

A

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to artistinresidence

Thank you artisitinresidence. I can always talk to my husband — though he’s at work now — or contact my sister, who unfortunately is in a different time zone here in the US & works as well. They are my two main confidantes. I also have a good friend here in town I can call. ... I journal a lot.

I was raised Catholic (my dad is Irish) & have lost a TON of faith in the church of late. My only “conversation” with God lately amounts to “how could you do this to me? What have I done to deserve this?!” Thank you SO much for answering.

artistinresidence profile image
artistinresidence in reply to nicetry

I think the church in general are people..sinners..Rexall r sinners saved by grace. But we are study and make ourselves approved to God..and not thru other than Gods word. Studying allows us to go deep into his word and we receive his revelation thru the wisdom God gives us. Get into a bible study with ladies that are mature seasoned Christian's. You will find a place you can call home. It's a step at a time . Try reading the book of John out loud...you see when we read outloud Gods word our ears hear..and it goes into us.. I pray you seek Gods peace one on one. Theres no greater comfort.

bandit09 profile image
bandit09

I am always here. I have a lot of the same feelings. You are not alone.

dom410 profile image
dom410

I'm here :) how are you feeling today?

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to dom410

Hi dom. I’m ok in a fragile sort of way of that makes sense.

dom410 profile image
dom410 in reply to nicetry

I've had many days like that. One thing I try to remember is I keep making it even past my worst day.

nicetry profile image
nicetry

Thank you URocks. That means so much to me, I can’t even tell you. ❤️

99depresse profile image
99depresse

I was cut off I was talking about essential oils for Depression. I purchase them from Doterra Into Essential Oils 800-411-8151. I order Balance, Frankincense, Elevation. I rub them on the back of my neck and top of arms. One in each separate place. It works for me. Antidepressants don't work for me. I've tried them all. Good luck and if you get them let me know how they work for you. You can't use both antidepressants and essential oils at the same time. It's either one or the other. Keep smiling things will get better. Hugs!

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to 99depresse

Thanks. I think my local Whole Foods sells Doterra oils, at least I’ve heard of them.

Tonybass5 profile image
Tonybass5

You will get through this. Hang in there. People care.

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to Tonybass5

Thanks so much ❤️

Hi! Look it's normal to feel the need to talk to someone, but it's not reason for you to call yourself needy!

I know how you feel and if you ever need someone to talk you can send me message, I want you to know that you're not alone!

nicetry profile image
nicetry in reply to

Thank you! ❤️

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