Severe Anxiety and depression

[Sotired248]

Need help looking for ways to deal and cope with my daily sometimes anxiety and panics attacks. It is literally ruining my life and making it unmanageable at times. I panic and worry over everything now if I feel something wrong with my health something as small as a headache I think I have a tumor or something...been through treatment before both inpatient and outpatient in the past and was doing well managing but then so many different stressors and situational things happened in the past year that has made this disorder rear it’s ugly head with a vengeance. The anxiety brings on the major depressive disorder and borderline personality disorder. I don’t want to be sedated under a army of meds and the bandaid Xanax is seemingly not working anymore. Insomnia is also an issue...I’m just looking for different experiences with it or alternative treatments that don’t necessarily means meds meds and more meds

[Hidden]

I know this feeling and its absolutely awful, I used to do it now I daren't even think about any aches or pains, I don't even know what causes it, I just know it's one of the scariest thoughts that's difficult to get out of your head, many many years ago, I smoked a joint and I spent the whole night with these kinds of thoughts running through my head and I have never touched cannabis since. I don't think it was the cannabis that caused it but it's the most significant time that I can remember having those deep thoughts, I can go for months without them thoughts and it's a long time since I had this bad as I do now. I need to work out what triggers them. Do you know what triggers yours ?

[Sotired248 in reply to Hidden]

Yes my trigger is myself..I’m also a lpn so anything I feel other then normal I start to over analyze and then the anxiety and panic starts...it’s a hard habit to break...in 2018 went through a lot divorce, selling of the house and not mentioned about 5 family members died as well so it was a very stressful year plus I worry about my elderly parents plus everything...no matter what I do I never feel it’s good enough.. with borderline personality disorder it’s a struggle with yourself...at this point I see the clinical signs and know I feel like I’m going down a slippery slope again. I just wanna be in a sense normal but isolation which I’m currently doing isn’t healthy but how do you keep your spirits up when your your own worse critic and MH as a whole is a joke you do the treatment and I feel like I’m just going so they can take my copay and that’s it. I want the help but don’t feel like what I’m getting is adequate..sorry for the rambles I’m all over the place

[Hidden in reply to Sotired248]

This is what I don't understand, how so many people are on treatment but still suffering, maybe this is why my GP doesn't like me because I won't take anything that's not making me feel better, I don't see the point. Do you ask for reviews ?

[SingingBirds]

It sounds odd, but someone I know use to snap the rubber band on her wrist to bring herself back to reality (kinda like the pinch me I'm dreaming thing). She also started to slowly count out loud to 100 when she started worrying. It's hard to have a mental breakdown and obsses when your counting. This seemed to help her tremendously. I hope you find something that works for you.