Hi! It’s 5:30 at my place, I’m already awake for two hours. It’s stress. I feel my head being tightened up, my breath much shorter and faster, my belly bloated. I went to bed at midnight and furtanetely fall asleep quite fast, I suppose within half hour. Yesterday for a change - where there was no stress, just anxiety - I fall asleep and slept like never for the last year. I needed to wake up at 6 but did it with no pain and I felt much better. Then when I came to my parents place after the psychologist session I could only sleep. First I just wanted to lie down by my mum but it turned into 7 hours sleep. And if I wouldn’t have to go to work, I would probably sleep all day. When anxiety is strong, I sleep well without waking up or just waking up for few minutes. I just sleep too long, sometimes cannot wake up, sometimes don’t want to. Generally speaking last month I spent on sleeping for 16 hours per day while all the period of depression I would not be able to fall asleep until 4/5 am and to sleep until 3, when on meds, I would fall asleep after taking but wake up after four six hours and then fall asleep again at the mentioned pattern.
Sleep is scaring me. I definitely prefer to oversleep than to be insomniac. In any case, I would actually love to be normal and sleep like the whole world is, 8 hours without waking up or having trouble getting to sleep or the worst being so numb and so tired.
I really wish this whole drama to end.