Been free from alcohol : I thought... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

87,308 members82,079 posts

Been free from alcohol

tamka38 profile image
84 Replies

I thought going sober will make everything better boy was I wrong I feel more depressed and anxious and disconnected feel like am losing my mind

Written by
tamka38 profile image
tamka38
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Read more about...
84 Replies
Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

How long has it been? I don’t know how long the effects of alcohol can last. Maybe you need time to readjust. Maybe you are going through withdrawal and it will get easier.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to Starrlight

29 days

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to tamka38

Good for you. I hope it gets easier for you.

SoberDrunk1 profile image
SoberDrunk1 in reply to tamka38

I am a recovered Alcoholic. Just completed 12 years of sobriety. The 12 steps of AA saved the way I lived. Today at times OCD kicks in but at no point, the obsession to drink has never come back. If you want to learn more about AA, I will be glad to elaborate.

Did you drink a lot when you used it?

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to

Yes

in reply to tamka38

You don't replace the time you had for drinking with doing something else... A new interest?

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to

No

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

we drink and self medicate so we don't feel our depression and anxiety...or any of our childhood abuse, traumas...etc. So when you sober up or come down...guess what...all that stuff you we were trying to numb ourself not to think about...it's still there....

the only way to get off this merry-go -round is to sober up...clean up....and talk to a therapist with a clear head.. Nope...no magic pill is gonna solve our issues over night, and it takes work and patience. And if you have the disease of alcoholism or addiction....well....then that's a guaranteed dead end without recovery.

the oxymoron With depression...is that alcohol is a depressant....yep....first couple of drinks you get a euphoria, then you go down hill from there till you either pass out or black out drunk. If you get professional help ...and have bad depression...they can put you on SSRI's and you can go through therapy to understand your stuff...or not.

either way it's your choice, your life...and nobody can fix you unless you want to change.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38

I want to change

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to tamka38

And I have change just don’t like feeling this way

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

I didn't either at first. I went thru the ups and downs of the severe depression, bipolar2, ADHD and crippling anxiety. I still deal with all that 7 years sober but it's worth it cause drinking its soooo much worse!! Please contact me if you need to talk

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I have Severe depression and PTSD and crippling anxiety I have a lot of childhood abuse

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

I've also got ptsd from 7 rapes so I understand you there too! I know you can beat this!! I read your 29 days sober!!! Wow girl your rockin it!!! It feels like crap I know but the first month is the hardest. You've got some tough days alreadybehind ya.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I was rape by multiple people friends and family

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

I'm so sorry you've been thru it too. That's why we drink too. To deal with,those traumatic days such as rape. God I wish you didn't have to deal with it too. So sorry!! I'm here ok. I totally understand how and what your going thru. Its an awful trauma we did not deserve. Its never our faukt,it those evil ppls fault!! If you take those meds I promise you'll feel better. I couldn't imagine going back thru all that pain day to day! Hit me up if you need to talk!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Yeah I do need a release been dealing with it since 5 years old always wanted to end my life because of it and still see the people today I feel so useless because I just let me run all over me

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Today started out good and now am crying

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Hi Hru

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

I also suffered severe depression especially while drunk and when I quit but it's nothing at all like it was. For your depression to get better staying sober is key!!! Just curious where do you live? I lived in Washington state the worst place for depression.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Flint mi I use to drink alcohol to numb everything

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

I think we all used it for that purpose. It works for that for the first few drinks or so but after that all it does is cause depression to get worse. Its a depressant and it will always bring you down farther each time. I did just like you I drank problems away but every time I drank I eventually woke up to feeling way worse than before I drank!! Its that vicious cycle of alcohol addiction. I think its one of the worst addictions.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Me to I was going to try AA do u take any meds?

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Yes try AA but it never worked for me but I'm stubborn cause I went to AA and NA for at least 15 years. It might be just what helps you stay sober!!! I'm glad you mentioned it cause I wasn't sure if you had gone or not. I read the big book of AA I don't know how many times. You'll be able to get a sponsor there at AA meeting too. Its someone you can call day or night to help you thru cravings etc. That could be very beneficial for you

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I never tried AA was thinking about it am so tried of my bf he drink and go crazy and he don’t think he have a problem am so happy we don’t live together

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Omg I'm sooooo happy your not living together. Two alcoholics cause enormous drama and problems that can be hard to get away from!!! Been there done that!!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

We use to stay together

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to lovedogs51511

I am not an AA ' only' convert by any means...maybe in the beginning because it got me sober and clean, I needed anything that was reliable and that someone was willing to help me no questions asked....over the couple of decades I needed less and less after going to therapy for all those years as well. I think of it as a good starting point of sobriety...but after a while if your not in therapy....you just become what is called a 'Dry Drunk'...you never get better and you never change...you just are sober. There is not a lot of emphasis on going to therapy in AA, and that I did not agree with that. So I did a lot of things to get better, therapy, group therapy, ACOA...etc.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I always need to talk

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Ill be here cause I'm not working right now plus on disability so I'm always here to chat!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Am on disability

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Are you my long lost sibling??? Lol!! We are like sisters. I really understand where you are coming from and how awful you feel right now. It does get better. I hated hearing that but didn't know it was true. But the truth is is that drinking feels worse!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

U right the next day because of hangovers and maybe you’re my lost sister since I have all brothers 😂

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Lol all I have is one brother. Too funny! Any of your brothers alcoholic?

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

No

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

When u was drinking what was the worst hangover or how it made u feel once u start trying to stop

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

I drank all day I never had hangovers anymore. Quitting was hell as ya know. Alcohol screaming my name every minute of the day! It will make you completely insane but I cried to God in my prayers went to church but,woke up one day and the obsession was gone

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to lovedogs51511

I've got 3 DUIs too So drinking causes more problems its just a waste of life.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I got a lot of DUIs and got my license took an away. I remember blacking out on a railroad tracks in my car because I was drunk passed out in my car because I was drunk at a gas station I was always drunk at my kids football games school I use alcohol daily to deal with my anxiety because I was afraid to have a panic attack and right now I don’t have any energy to do anything around the house but if I was drunk I would be doing everything because drinking made me strong helped me to forget and made me numb but after I finish drinking here comes the hangovers and depression and anxiety through the roof

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Ok yea the depression and anxiety is always worse when sober cause I'm taking so many pills to stay happy. I take lamictal and Geodon for bipolar2, pristiq for depression. Just started propranylolol for anxiety which has been a miracle drug for my anxiety. I couldn't leave my home for anything but can a little bit now. So I'm totally medicated which I totally need. Have you ever seen a Dr for the depression or anxiet

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Yes but was afraid to try medication

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Oh hell no I welcomex it!! Please Dr help me basically!!! I've always taken meds thru out life

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I have meds but afraid to take them

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Oh please take them they help so so very much! Without them I'd be going insane too!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I will try them because I want to feel better

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Do u have panic attack’s or u single? Who is your support system

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

I've had lots of panic attacks!!! Put me in the ER many times! Horrible feeling! Single but sick of mens crap so very happy single. No stress of being cheated, lied to anymore! Life is much easier now!! Lol. Mom has been my main support even currently still is at 7 years sober! Pretty bad being 45 and still feel like a mess but that's just where I'm at. I've got a great family that's always been there but they don't understand alcoholism or anything at all.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I had a lot of panic attacks too and am 41 sometimes I hate myself

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Feel like am going insane right now

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

What I've always used is sleeping pills to just go to sleep in hurtful insane days! Sometimes sleep does wonders!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Never thought about that I need to stop being afraid to try meds and just try to give them a try

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Oh please do cause I couldn't function without them. Your missing out feeling at peace by not taking them.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Maybe if I take them I can think straight and leave my bf alone for good

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Yes great idea!!! Believe me I'd be so angry and beyond non fictional if I didn't take them. Oh man it would be messed up!!!

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to lovedogs51511

I used to take anabuse to quit drinking but even drank on that

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I just feel so lost and alone I need to started praying more and going to church i need all the help I can get

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

That's what saved my life. I never believed in God but when I just woke up 7 years ago and decided I didn't need to go get beer cause I had no cravings anymore. What ??? I couldn't believe it. I cried and cried to God for sooooo many years and going to church every sunday that He is the only,thing that saved me from death by drinking

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I need to start back going to church because am tried of feeling this way and I don’t want to die from drinking alcohol and I really need a higher power in my life right now

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Yes please try cause I would be dead or I would be homeless. Hey I've got to charge phone its almost dead. I've really enjoyed talking with you. This phones crappy cause it now only charges if its standing straight up. What a pain in the you know what!!! Please let me know how your doing ok. Ill always respond except for when phone dies. Lol

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Thank u for talking to me I really appreciate it I hope to talk to u again. Really enjoy talking to u too

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Am here for u too hugs to u❤️

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Hugs back to you tamka38! I hope to talk to you again as well! I just pray I can help even for a minute. Its so worth it cause your awesome and really trying to change your life and I admire you for that!

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to lovedogs51511

Please attend church, pray hard cry,to God to help save you from this and please give meds a try ok. You would feel sooooo much better!!! Trust me!!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Ok thank you

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

How ya doing??? If your awake let me know if your ok!! Its hard on Friday nights so I'm here phones charged

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Btw, my name is Kacey and its been really great meeting you! I've been searching for someone in recovery to try and talk to so thank you. I haven't been able to help another cause I don't go to AA anymore but,I'm thinking about going again to try and help someone thru the struggles of getting sober. I just moved to Utah so not sure where meetings are. Ill go if you try it too. Then we can share about our experiences with each other. Just a thought. Hang,in there. I'm available cause I just woke up so hit me up whenever you need to!!! Hugs

Rpan profile image
Rpan

Tamka your well on your way to changing. Some find AA/NA is helpful. Not sure if this is an option, it’s free and it has a set of steps that need to be followed, to stay sober. Mostly these steps help us heal from our past, with our higher powers help. We have to deal with our past, when we are ready. Early on just staying away from the drink is the priority, the anxiety and depression will become manageable. Congratulations for not drinking. Keep talking let it all our..

tamka38 profile image
tamka38

Oh thank u is just really hard feeling all your feelings at once

Apowersyavg profile image
Apowersyavg

Hi! I’m going through the same exact problem. I drank last night after not drinking for a while (I was feeling awful with my anxiety and depression, feeling disconnected all the time) - and I feel absolutely horrible today. I feel like I’m going crazy. These waves of depression are awful, i feel it in my stomach - then I stress and start to disconnect from reality feeling I don’t know who I am - then I begin to panic and feel all symptoms of a panic attack. I’m here if you need to talk. I’ve been trying to talk to someone about this but it’s defeating when they listen yet don’t fully grasp what is going on. Kind of assured me that I’m okay and this doesn’t only happen to me.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to Apowersyavg

Hey am here if u need to talk it happen to me to all the time

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511

Hi I'm also sober from alcohol and drugs 7 years. Its very hard but I know you can do this!!! I've been there oh so many times!!! It will get better. I promise and truly mean that. How long sober? I totally understand what your going thru. Trust me it gets better with time. If you ever just need a sober friend to talk to I'm here for you. I mean anytime!! Alcohol was my main drug of choice too. So let me know how your doing so maybe I can help.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

Am 29 days sober and am so depressed and anxious and disconnected and numb all feeling all my feelings at once and I don’t know what to do one minute am happy the next am sad I feel so bipolar and my bf is an alcoholic and I hate being around him because he’s always tripping on me and am just trying to get to know myself again is so hard and nobody in my family understand

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Omg I totally understand I really really do. I'm also bipolar2! Lol. I couldn't get sober for 23 years so its tough when family just doesn't get it. Man I think that's been the hardest to deal with. Even sober mine doesn't understand the alcoholism or bipolar2. So ill be here if you need someone to talk to!!#

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to lovedogs51511

You've got to end that relationship! Your the only one that matters. Your changing your life and trust me you'll regret staying with him cause he will bring you down!!! Please end it cause its going to hurt your recovery!!

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I really do need to end it because he keep saying he’s done drinking and was drinking all yesterday until he pass out and he’s drinking right now we do not stay together but he’s a big problem to my issues

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Oh boy yea you need to help yourself which your doing great by being sober 29 days!! drinkers always hook up together. Such a horrible idea. If he chooses to destroy his life that's totally his problem. Please DO NOT LET HIM BRING YOU BACK DOWN TO HIS LEVEL!!! Your changing but,it may not feel like it right now but you've made a huge change

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

He stress me out so much he use to jump on me put me out his house make me have sex to him and right now he started something today because he’s drunk 😵 I know what drinking dose to people and I don’t ever want to feel that way again and am tried of forgiving him

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to tamka38

Never forgive him for anything! He's being the jerk. Stay single for now you'll be glad you did. I really wish I could of taken advice back then instead of giving into alcohol again and AGAIN. AA will be great for you cause you find an outlet to talk only,if you want to and make friends with ppl that totally get what its like to be an alcoholic and how it feels to get sober

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to lovedogs51511

I will think about it been messing around with this man for 15 years

MsGelfling1 profile image
MsGelfling1

My sister drank heavy for 45 years. She was drunk every day of her life. She was hateful, mean, rude, selfish, and very expectant of people around her. She used to spend her check on booze and then call me and tell me she didn't make enough money to pay her bills and wanted me to run her two hundred dollars to the bar. She must have thought I was born ten minutes ago. Point of this story is this. Now she is dying of 4th stage cirrhosis. Her body swells with fluid and he skin looks like it's going to pop. He's become extremely dependent on my for food, a place to live, cigarettes, clean clothes, and whatever else she feels she must have because she's sick. I don't feel sorry for her. Lots of times I have to get away from her because I feel like I'll just punch her in the face if she doesn't shut up about what people won't do for her. Figure out how to stop drinking and be happy. Go to the doctor and get some help. Don't keep on and make someone else's life miserable the way my sister has made mine miserable.

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to MsGelfling1

Am sorry about your sister and is not right she treating u like that. All the things u said about your sister is the way my bf act everyday and am tried of him he don’t have cirrhosis but he drinks everyday and he stop eating meats months ago and only eating vegetables he keep saying he’s healing his body and I keep telling him he’s killing his self we don’t love together thank God I want to help him but I need help myself don’t know what to do to help him out

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

Hi I don't know how you can think it would take less that 29 days to feel a lot better after giving up a habit you have indulged in for so long. It's like me who has smoked for 44 years until last August expecting to recover completely and in less than a month. I still crave a bit after 8 months and I have also caused thyroid problems. The drink can affect you in a similar way.

It just doesn't happen like that. When you stopped drinking you gave yourself a chance of a much longer and happier life and that will happen in time. Stay off the drink as this the best thing you can do for yourself.

Well done for this and don't be tempted to go back to it. x

tamka38 profile image
tamka38 in reply to hypercat54

U right and thank u

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to tamka38

Lol I felt a lot like you until someone pointed this out to me. Now instead of feeling omg why did I pack in the fags when I feel like this, I am grateful things aren't worse after abusing my lungs for so long.

Alcohol as well as smoking can mask symptoms as well as cause them as it messes with our organs. I have given up ciggies before they give me up (then the outlook would be very bleak) and you have given up the alcohol - isn't addiction a b****? x

You may also like...

Has anyone been on naltrexone for alcohol cravings?

dopamine.“” That seems like it wouldn’t be good for someone suffering depression. The page I was...

I have just been discharged from the hospital

condition, they have ruled out anything serious. Losing consciousness was one of the scariest...

Alcohol?

scared to slip back into a major depression, is the alcohol making me feel this way? Can you...

Alcoholic?

have been drinking more often but I never thought of it as a real problem. Do I feel like she is...

Alcohol 🤷‍♀️

that alcohol makes people depressed and messes up with sleep but for me, I’m way more depressed now...