Going on trip, just started new meds. Afraid I'm not stable.

Hi all,

I'm 24 years old. I was diagnosed with severe OCD when I was 6 years old and still suffer from it today. Only a few years ago, I found a good mix of antidepressants and antianxiety meds. About a month ago, after having an extreme manic episode (an amazing feeling that I keep trying to chase) to severe depression, I was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder on top of my ocd. This happened a month ago. I was taken off of all my antianxiety and antidepressants and I am now on mood stabilizers. My OCD is now out of control. Im having up to 2 panic attacks a day at the least. I'm obsessing about everything.

The part that scares me most is that I'm leaving in less than a week to travel Europe, something I have had planned for over a year. I lost my insurance and can no longer afford to pay my psychiatrist out of pocket, so I'm unable to check in with him as often as I'd like.

I don't know what to do. This trip could either be a great distraction or I can totally fall apart...

Any advice on what I should do?

Thank you.

[Kobojunkie]

Seems you already have a good idea what will most likely happen to you on the trip. You seem to know, based on where you are with your symptoms, that chances are high you may fall apart on this trip. As for the chance that the trip may turn out as a possible distraction from OCD, that I doubt since OCD is a behavioural issues, and panic attacks don't take vacations. They show up whenever they want and you have no choice but to deal with them there and then.

But not to sound like a pessimist in this case, I will say, follow your head in this.

[BonnieSue]

Do you still have any antianxiety meds left? If so, you might want to take them on your trip to avoid panic attacks that will ruin your vacation trip. You badly need to have your anxiety under better control. I will also recommend at the same time, that you get a call in to your psychiatrist's office and get a message in for your doctor that you're having extremely high anxiety with panic attacks just as you've said here and ask if he/she will increase your anxiety meds so your anxiety will be under better control since it's out of control right now.