Work in progress.. the journey is long yet fulfilling

4 years ago... I walked out of my office before lunch and never returned to work until a year later. I was overworked and had family issues and suffered from severe anxiety and depression. I recognized there was something wrong with me much earlier like when I started bursting out crying when someone asked me how I am. Or when I nearly drove off the highway thinking I was having a heart attack (was actually a panic attack). I would scream out of the blue as I hear voices in my head telling me constantly how bad I was in many ways. I would scream in an attempt to drown out the voices but it never worked. Anyway I had to undergo therapies after therapies and then started meds to control my anxiety and so that I could also sleep (I would stare at walls until 7am and fell asleep for an hour out of exhaustion before I woke up again). I was suffering and felt empty. I felt as good as dead. During that time I spent at home I slowly tried to do things I normally would not do and for me it was cooking. I picked it up and started to enjoy it. I restarted my life again somehow and getting close to my friends again, back to work as well etc. it was hard and believe me it's still work in progress for me. I'm still on meds till today and I've got my moments of ups and downs. It's a real and a long battle that not a lot can relate to but in the end shows you the amazing amount strength we all possess. Try to find something to give life meaning, a new hobby, talking to loved ones, exercise whatever it is that makes you feel better. I keep reminding myself too.. it's easy to forget. Be brave and keep your chin up!

6 Replies

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  • I admire your courage and strength! <3

  • Thank you... :)

  • I will bet having a strong support system really helped you back. I am happy that you are doing well. Are you in the same kind of job that you did before?

  • Yep. In the same company. Basically I was granted medical leave for that year to cope with my condition and got back to the same position with much more resources to support me. I like my job a lot but it was too much pressure and no rest at all. One thing i learnt was to know when enough is enough. I pushed it too hard and didn't listen to me. :(

  • That is great. Sounds like you work for a supportive company. The main issue was that you learned to take care of yourself. Liking your job is a great help as well.

  • You sound like an amazing person with great strength and resilience. You have fought your way back and though it's not easy, have found a balance that is working. I can learn a lot from what you shared. Thank you!

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