This picture was just one month ago when Joe went to Vienna for cell balancing treatment and he looked AMAZING so it’s hard to believe just a month later- here we are. Joe refuses to go on hospice, but we have a palliative care doctor (who is also a hospice physician) who comes to our home. We are no longer seeking treatment as the cancer has spread literally to every bone able to visualized. Throughout his spine, pelvis and ribs - cancer has replaced his bone marrow. He’s lost about 15 pounds since this picture and lost much of his mobility. He’s up 2-4 hours a day and the rest of the time he sleeps. His pain is manageable most of the time with 150 microgram fentanyl patch, 5mg of methadone 2x/day and norco and dilaudid for breakthrough. He was in very bad shape before this trip, had an amazing 7 days while he was there, but the benefits quickly dissipated when he returned home. Last week his oxygen at home was in the mid 80’s so I took him to the ER where his hemoglobin was 6.2. They gave him a blood transfusion and he elected to go home. It’s really impossible to know how long the transfusion will last. There was concern he wouldn’t survive the weekend but it’s Sunday and we are watching tv together in bed and it’s been a good day. In the past several months we have renewed our wedding vows/married in the Catholic Church, had friends visit from all over the country, spent almost 100% of our time together as I am on family leave from work, spent so much time with our kiddos and parents and siblings, had friends contribute yarn to the making of the most beautiful prayer blanket I have ever seen, with one for each of our six children made from the same yarn...and we know that we have literally done every single treatment available as well as every trial for which he was eligible. Joe is comfortable, he is home. He is surrounded by love. He surpassed all crappy prognosis by miles. He fought cancer, and at the end of the day I will never believe he lost or that cancer won. We will enjoy however many days or weeks he has left and I don’t know anyone who truly loves LIFE as much as my husband. Please keep us in your prayers, thoughts, whatever it is that you do- as we journey on... I hope that Joe’s story and life will give hope to someone else who has a horrible prognosis. He turned “3-12 months” into almost 4 years- and there has been a lot of living in those years, and there continues to be a lot of living in each day. Thanks all on this site for the information sharing and for the support. Eternally grateful...
Nearing the end : This picture was just... - Advanced Prostate...
Nearing the end
You and Joe are the quintessential example of what love, family and grace mean. Peace to you and your loved ones.
I have followed your posts and have been thinking about you and Joe. You guys are warriors. Sending prayers for Joe, you, and your family. God bless you!
It sounds like you are doing everything you can do, and have done everything you could, making every day count. I think palliative care is a better alternative than standard hospice - some treatments relieve pain better than opiates.
Agreed. I wish we had started working with our palliative care physician much earlier. Her knowledge of pain management surpasses that of any oncologist we have seen. It has been very helpful and would have been beneficial over the past several years. Also, while I personally am a big fan of hospice, I have had to realize over time that doesn’t mean it will work for Joe and respect his right to self-determination. For him, palliative care and family support combined meets his needs fine. Still would encourage others to be open to hospice though...
Thank you Katy for this beautiful love story . God blessed Joe with you, strength of spirit and love to you both .❤️❤️
God Bless you both. Share your love now and again after death. This life is only the beginning.
I will continue to update on this journey. I know that I benefited from the experiences of others and I hope others will benefit from ours as well. 🙏
I concur. My empathy is with both of you and your entire family.
So sorry to hear this turn around. Wishing you the best. John
You have an amazing love which will last forever.
That is the truth! ❤️
May the hand of God lead Joe into the light of eternal life.
This is truly a love story and you have allowed us to be included , thank you. I have prayed for your family and was happy on good times and sad on those bad ones. He has fought so hard to stay with his family and I too would never say that cancer won . God just says son , it’s time no more pain. I wish as many days as Joe &God decide onto enjoy. I am so happy you have such a amazing
Support family& friends. My heart is broken
For you & your family but from all of our text
I think you know that♥️🙏. Sharon
Sharon, Thank you so much for your kind support and messages over the years now. You have such a giving heart and are a blessing. Thank you. ❤️🙏
Thank you so much for the wisdom-filled update.He's not being cured of the disease, but obviously a lot of love and extended healing is happening right up to the end.
Peace and love to you all.
Joe is the ultimate warrior and what a wonderful wife and caregiver you are. My heart and hugs out to both of you. Lots of wonderful love showing with you guys, it’s beautiful.
🌸🌻🌼🦋🌈❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much. I do know I am very lucky and always grateful for my sweet husband though I am sad at the loss of so many plans for our future. We are enjoying all the moments now though! ❤️☺️⭐️🌈
Sounds like Joe is comfortable and it sure sounds like you have some hefty strength and clarity going for you. That’s really really going to be beneficial for both of you. I often mention my PCa friend , Bussman , who was finally sent home to home hospice with his caregiver wife Peggy .... nothing left for him after 22 years of endless awful battle. He was able to stay comfortable, even putter around his garden and do things , for over three years. Humans can be far more resilient than you would expect ...... I hope Joe is just as resilient. Time is most precious when there is so little of it remaining isn’t it !
❤️❤️❤️
Peace be with him and all those that love him.
You are correct live each day. He has an infectious smile. Your post hits home to all of us with narrow treatment options. Best wishes to you both and your family. We all live on in others hearts from your post your husband will live forever.
It is hard when treatment options start to dwindle. I will say over the years there were many times I thought he was out of options only to have another door open. Later a trial, and even after that a completely last ditch treatment. Truly you just never know so keep the faith! He does have an infectious smile. Thank you. ☺️
👏
Thank you for sharing. I had not read the Bible in quite a while and that was exactly what I needed. You do so much for this group. Thank you and thank you for your prayers.
God bless you Katy and provide you and your beautiful family with all the strength and comfort you need. You and your warrior husband will be in my prayers. I have been following your posts and had so much hope for you at every turn. My heart is breaking for you.
I am at an earlier stage of a similar journey. Your beautiful and loving note is an inspiration to us all. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing that with me. My heart is with you and those you love and who love you. I know what it’s like to love someone at the end of their life but I cannot pretend to know it feels to be that person and all of the accompanying and I would imagine conflicting emotions I would imagine are there. My prayer for you l- as it is for my husband - is peace... This is a good place to reach out to for support as well and I hope you will ask for and receive what you need. 🙏
I have wondered about you guys. Ever since you sent that beautiful picture of all of you, so many of us have felt a warm kindred with your family. I have prayed for you guys to have the strength to deal with what comes and it sounds like at least those prayers were answered. I can tell you one thing from my own family’s experience that may bring some comfort. My three siblings and I Lost my father at a similar age with us being 7 to 17 at the time. We made it through together with the help of my mom and each other. And although we all miss our father terribly to this day, he is still by our side all the time in so many ways. In no small part because of him we all have all lead Successful happy lives with families of our own. Love has the ability to transcend time. I know you’re family will make it through this too.
Schwah.
Dear Katy,
What a wonderful wife and mother you are. You will see Joe again, God will make sure of that.
Our love to you, Joe and your lovely family.
Phil and Mrs Phil xxxxxxx
Thank you Phil and Mrs Phil ❤️. I believe that too...
You have done so much and the end is so hard. I hope he has a very peaceful transition and that you find happiness for yourself again at some time in the future. I am so sorry. Take good care of yourself.
You are so loving and strong. I hope I can be the same way when our time comes. Prayers and blessings to both of you.
Thank you. I think it’s hard to know how anyone is going to be and some days are harder than others. Today has not been a good day and I’m not feeling particular strong and Joe is in pain and really crabby. It is definitely one day (and sometimes one hour) at a time. Cancer is not for the weak.
Joe is the true meaning of inspiration. Thank you for so much for sharing your beautiful journey through out this very difficult time. My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. I pray to God I can be as brave as you are when I reach those very difficult times with my husband. My heart goes to you. Again my deepest condolences. 💙💙💙
I know that his journey has inspired many others and I think is something he will be remembered for and I’m grateful for that. I hope you will reach out when you need to. Making yourself vulnerable allows people who want to care for you to be able to and I’ve never regretted that. I’m my most desperate times it has gotten me through. ❤️
Stay strong and dwell in the good memories. Have faith as it soothes and heals. You have been a rock to Joe and trust me he knows it as well. Katy, my very best to you and Joe, Hugs all around. I am so touched that you have a great circle of friends and family to support and care for both of you. Send my love to Joe 
Take care
Haniff
My prayers are with you both
Beautiful and painful things to share. You've given so much to each other and more in the life hereafter.
He fought more years than I could imagine. My condolences and blessing to you. Mike
Thank you for your generous and inspiring post at such a difficult time. I only hope I can provide such amazing support and comfort for my man when the time comes.
Prayers & love, my heart breaks for you both.Love & hugs SheilaFxxx
What a great love story! I pray for Joe, Katy you and your family 🙏.
Bless you and your Joe! My Joe and I take strength from your strength. I pray for peace as he transitions, and comfort for your family once he’s gone. Thank you for sharing.
Your sharing brings Beauty into our lives as we bow before the depths of Love. May Love continue to surround you both.
:,o(
Praying for you and your family!!! God Bless!!
I wish you strength and peace.
My thoughts are with you both. You turnedcthis horrible situation into something beautiful. Peace to you both.
He is so blessed to clearly have so much love surrounding him. It is a living testament to his spirit and own character of those he clearly so deeply loved. Sending the biggest virtual bear hugs and love to you and your family.
Thank you for sharing, I wish there was something I could say or do to make it better. It is a future that is also awaiting me and so many reading this, you are in my prayers.
Prayers are coming your way to you and your family.
Thank you for that beautiful story. He is fortunate to have your love .
May you both find comfort and peace. I will be praying for your family.
I pray for both of you. We are all in this together.
Prayers and hugs for your family. Joe has been a true hero from the start, and I thank you and Joe for sharing his journey. He looks truly happy in the photo and it's nice to know that your lives have not - and do not - completely revolve(d) around PCa. We are so much more than these mortal struggles, and Joe has proven that! - Joe M.
Praying for Joe and yourself and your kids.
You are both an inspiration to us fellow warriors!
Beautiful picture and spirit. God bless you all and the peace of Love and our support. Thank you
🙏🏻💕
Prayers for you & your family. We all know how hard the fight is for this cancer. None of us know the day or time. Joe is very blessed to have you to share his life with you at this time. Sharing the vows of your Catholic ceremony was touching..so glad you are able to do these things. My husband and I celebrated our 40th anniversary with a vow renewal and so glad we did. We don't know how many more we will be able to celebrate, so celebrate every day with family & friends means a lot. God Bless you & Joe!
May his passing be uneventful with family/friends there He fought the good fight, finished the race, and kept the FaithPeace be with you Brother 💙
Hugs from CA😢
Thank you for sharing this, it means so much for others to hear this. We all know this horrible cancer has changed our lives in so many ways and it’s always appreciated when others in this same situation post, informing and reminding us to live life to the fullest & appreciate every day. God Bless you & Joe. 🙏
What an amazing story. You are true superheroes.Love and prayers always.
So sorry to hear but wow, what an amazing level of fight Joe has in him. I'd like to specifically thank him for taking part in trials and helping move the science forward. May your remaining days together be peaceful and filled with love.
What a hero Joe is !
🙏🙏🙏
I encourage everyone to go back 2 years and view the beautiful picture of two good looking members (view the joekaty post under the heading "Looks great, but think Xtandi is coming to an end"). Joe is such a young guy and with 6 children.... it breaks my heart to see him suffer so. Fair... it's not fair for both Joe and Katy to have to endure cancer. You know that I favor fighting the monster with humor and not with sadness. So here goes: Husband and his wife sitting on the porch and he's drinking a beer when suddenly he says "I love you". His wife asks him, "Dear we're you talking to me or was that the beer taking?" Husband replies "I was talking to the beer".....
Give those 6 kids a hug and a kiss from Uncle j-o-h-n..... God Bless...
Good Luck, Good Health and Good Humor.
j-o-h-n Monday 03/22/2021 6:42 PM DST
Peace, Love, and Comfort. Amen.
4 years of a great life. That's amazing. Sending prayers to your and your family. Sounds like you've made 4 great years for him.
God be with you and your family. Will keep Joe in our prayers. Amen
Yours is obviously an incredible love story and I wish you all peace. ❤️🙏🏻
Hugs and prayers for you, Joe and your family.
God Bless you both. My prayers are with you 🙏🏻
Me too to all the wonderful comments here. Your posts always dug deep into the challenges of this illness at the same time they are inspirational.
My prayers for your husband, you and your family. May the days ahead be full of love and togetherness.
Katy - what a beautiful depiction of love, fierce determination, support and peace. I’m so heartbroken for you both as you face this current path, but at the same time stand in awe of the path that brought you here. May we all be so lucky to have the kind of love and support you have for each other. You’re both in my thoughts and prayers, as well as your beautiful children. Will be thinking you you my friend. ❤️ - Cindy
Definately praying for all you warriors of. God bless you
❤️❤️❤️
I’m glad you all got to create such beautiful memories whilst also undergoing the treatments and dealing with never ending anxiety. My prayers to him and the entire family. This kind of love never dies and god bless you all 😊
Thank you for sharing your story. Cancer is not defeating your husband, he has remained positive and on this journey. You both are heroes. Praying for your family. Peace, comfort and grace.
I am thinking of your husband and sending my wishes of a peaceful transition for him. I too am in my 50’s and thus feel a deeper connection to my brothers in this fight that are similar in age. All I can say is I understand the unfairness of this. I was in a very tough spot a year back and preparing myself too. I found solace in my family, friends and experiences I have lived. I’m not religious, but I found comfort in some Buddhist teachings to calm my mind and prepare my soul for what for me is an unknown. I’m sorry for Joe and I’m sorry for you Katy. Thank you for being so strong for Joe at this time. Cleodman wrote of this lasts not long ago and that he felt peace in not fighting the River. His words also brought me solace.
Until We Meet Again...
prostate cancer in bladder - removed - now renal failure
