Irratable: Robotic prostatectomy summer... - Advanced Prostate...

Advanced Prostate Cancer

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Irratable

harryb48 profile image
53 Replies

Robotic prostatectomy summer of 2013, 39 radiation treatments spring of 2014, rising PSA summer of 2016. I am currently getting Eligard shots every six months that seem to have things under control; last check PSA .25 and testosterone 13.3. Other than weight gain and fatigue has anyone else noticed a significant change in their temperament? I seem to have a much shorter fuse and become irritated much easier since I've been receiving the shots!

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harryb48
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docbulldog profile image
docbulldog

I retired from teaching following my initial treatments, I probably would have noticed immediately,any of those changes, if I were still in the Jr High classroom. But my wife says I’m still pretty calm. I get my Elligard and Xgeva shots every 3 months, maybe the bigger dose you are taking effects you differently.

YostConner profile image
YostConner

You may want to ask your doctor whether you might benefit from an antidepressant. My husband calls them my happy pills. I went off them for a short period last year, and the short fuse came back.

Welcome to “ the club”! Check the movie The judge.. he ran down a child molester that escaped his justice system in court . They deemed him not really responsible for his action of anger because he was crazed with cancer treatments. I’m not saying let’s go kill someone . I feel like a ping pong ball at times. My days are scattered with rushes of emotion . Some good some terribly bad. The point is we can’t take this out on those closet to us. Mornings are rough. Wake nauseaous grimace in the mirror. No appetite for and hour or two. If I get thru the morning ok then I can have a good day When I wake mad and go ragin canon , my innocent wife runs for the hills. I’m 3yrs into this mad hatter project. I do feel less iratated with each new month.. Angry, take a walk or workout.. without sex , what ways do we release tension ? You are not alone in this by any means. Ain’t it a kick?

harryb48 profile image
harryb48 in reply to

Yes, you just pretty much described how I feel. I used to be a very active person, carpenter by trade, country boy by birth. Enjoyed being outside doing all matter of things to stay busy, firewood, garden, lawn care etc. Now just content to sit and vegetate. I see my doctor next week and need to discuss some options. Thanks for your reply.

in reply toharryb48

Hang in there baby ! M .M. Helps take the edge off for me. Phycho tropics some suggest. Do you ever feel like you are boiling? I do , quite often ,, it usually fades with time. However I did go thru heavy depression and suicidal thinking over the past 3yrs. I’ve been there, sleeping and not eating for a few days, gets bad then. We have to,work on a happy outlook daily . It takes practice to,accept the cruel phycological twist that APC and treatments force on us. Its just as important or maybe more so then our physical gripes. . The flesh is weak. Motivation can b the prob. The smart choice is to go into a more spiritual realm and work on seeing the good instead of letting the bad destroy our existence. We can also due much harm to those close to us. I have days that i don’t want to get up.. That can lead us nowhere fast. I’m finding the more I move the better I feel and visa versa.. Depression can kill us just as much as APC. Talk about it, talk things out. Don’t hold things in. I’ve felt at times that the entire world is my enemy. No happiness comes from that thinking.. Jump on a plane come see me in Tucson and we’ll solve this shit.. It’s all an eternal battle. Someone once said. “ He that can conquer himself can conquer the world. Believe it was Alexander the Great. And he almost did conquer the world. We must stop being our own enemy. Blaming ourself for all instead of working on solutions.. That’s not profitable. matcha tea has good caffeine. We’re all f****** by APC .. I’m no better than you. Dig deep and get movin..Luckily our lives aren’t over quite yet.. Take it easy!

ARIES29 profile image
ARIES29 in reply toharryb48

Hello harryb48, theres that word.....vegetate! These doctors couldnt give a crap about quality of life at all, I was on Lucrin shots with a side order of Casodex & put on weight,lethargic,joints froze up ect so no more treatments but psa rising.

It is just where we are in life, who we have around us & is it all worth it???

harryb48 profile image
harryb48 in reply toARIES29

I agree, sometimes I wonder. Had a friend stop his treatments and said let the cards fall where they may. Not sure that’s the right approach!

in reply toharryb48

miracles can happen . What’s happened to your friend . How long ago did he do that?

harryb48 profile image
harryb48 in reply to

It's been about eighteen months, he looks terrible and refuses to talk about his condition. He told his wife he couldn't stand the weight gain and absolute fatigue any longer, I think there were other issues that bothered him more.

ARIES29 profile image
ARIES29 in reply toharryb48

The other issues could have been the lack of sex? That just goes south on medication for this i found

in reply toharryb48

There always are...sorry to hear that . I have an idiot friend that’s had issues but still refuses to go to uro for years now. Even after he saw what happened with me.. Doc said that I had this inside of me for years before my idiotic almost tooo late diagnosis. He says he doesn’t want to know. Totally different #1 or #2 compared to #4 .I thought A prostatectomy would be the worse. I know differently now. Keep trucking..

ARIES29 profile image
ARIES29 in reply toharryb48

I have not had my medication now for over 6 months & i feal much better in myself,i take herbal mood support & cercumin for arthritis but i will have to start the bicacutamide or casodex again due to rising psa,12 now? I will let you know how it goes.

For me quality of life is so important plus the police here dont give me those peircing glances when i drive my car. I mean how hard can this BS get?

in reply toARIES29

You take the Same-e?

ARIES29 profile image
ARIES29 in reply to

The same -e? I had my first cosudex tablet today & fell asleep twice while driving then came home & had a terrible argument with people around me!

in reply toARIES29

Sam-e is a natural supplement for anxiety. I haven’t used it. But I’ll try anything natural to cope. med marijuana helps cool you off if you have that proclivity as I do.I do and we all can all go through the same stuff as you.

ARIES29 profile image
ARIES29 in reply to

Thankyou Lulu700,yes the natural remedies are the way to go i think. I will not try marijuana as yet but will double up on the herbal mood support for now. It is such a shame we all have to go through these mood swings just to try and get more of life itself.

in reply toARIES29

What choice do we have .??We laugh we cry as we go around in the spin cycle.

ARIES29 profile image
ARIES29 in reply to

I know im not the first one to think this but i hope people do not remember me as some bad tempered old fart.This is something one has to go through to appreciate.

in reply toARIES29

We don’t want to go thru yrs (if we’re so lucky) of treatments and suffering with a cruel or mean attitude towards others or ourselves. I don’t want to go out that way. As a bitter mean spirited old Man.I saw a family friend do that to his loving wife. That’s a crime. Ive had a great life not with out problems but nothing serious until APC at 53. So I’m practicing a grateful spirit. I ‘ve had some anger issues and depression before APC .I feel that APC amplifies everything bad. I don’t appreciate anything about APC except clarity of perspective and the knowlegde that not only is our life important but more important are the life’s of those that are close to us .I surely will not destroy my family or leave a mean legacy For others to remember me by. We all need to find peace in our hearts before we checkout I’m working on it .

ARIES29 profile image
ARIES29 in reply to

Well put Lulu700,bringing everything into perspective seems to be what life travel is all about. I have been far to hasty in my decision making in years gone by & seem to be paying for it now so from this day forth clarity & perspective are the goals... Thank you for that & good fortune in your travel

in reply toARIES29

I’m as lost as anyone in the APC maze of life. I think that any day without brutal pain should not be wasted. We still need to find enjoyment in life. Or what’s the point. I bump my head in the dark just like the rest of us. That old saying “ you gotta love yourself first” It’s really true. If we hate ourself or the world with anger then APC will make quick work of us.. Take it easy on yourself and I’ll try to,do the same.. I felt initially that I had also thrown my entire life away. I blame myself for PC and every other mistake I’ve made. Gotta throw that backpack away . Let our past go , live to enjoy the simple things in life.. No matter how bad we have it there is always someone that has it worse. I’m working on gratitude...

One of the most frequent side effects of ADT is depression and mood changes. Depression and anxiety can be associated with significant irritability. Emotional professional support with or without medicines is indicated if you or your love ones realize that there are changes in your personality.

Best

Raul

harryb48 profile image
harryb48 in reply to

Thanks, never thought I would admit I might be depressed, but it seems I'm headed that way. Going to the doctor next week with a lot of questions. Thanks

Good luck at the Doc’s!

j-o-h-n profile image
j-o-h-n

Now everything on me is shorter. 🙄

Good Luck and Good Health.

j-o-h-n Friday 02/09/2018 6:58 PM EST

j-o-h-n profile image
j-o-h-n

Oh Yeah, I forgot that this morning I really got upset when I put my right foot sock on my left foot and vice versa. Bothered me all day.

Good Luck and Good Health.

j-o-h-n Friday 02/09/2018 7:02 PM EST

harryb48 profile image
harryb48

Easier not to wear socks!

Izab

Harry, I'm also on eligard. I was so irritable 12 months ago my wife found me hard to live with. We both sort counselling at Sir Charles Gairdner hospital. I'm happy to say I'm a lot happier about our relationship. I'm coping much better with life.

in reply to

Your wife my wife and all partners know what you’re talking about. Good counseling worked..

Rob1053 profile image
Rob1053

I have used both Eligard and the Lupron shots. I had similar reaction only worse to the Eligard shots. They depressed me terribly, made me irritable and the fatigue was horrible. I switched back to the Lupron shots and find them MUCH easier to cope with. Still have hot flashes but other side effects for me are much better. Good luck.

harryb48 profile image
harryb48 in reply toRob1053

I had two injections of Lupron prior to the Eligard and don't remember any significant issues, may have to go back to Lupron. See what the doctor says. Thanks for the input.

larry_dammit profile image
larry_dammit

Harry. Wife said I was irritable and moody. With my meds. The doctor had put me on Effexor for the hot flash’s,they doubled the amount and it settled me down. Worked for me. Now. Hard not to be angry about the situation it’s a real bummer ,have lots of plans and not ready to cash in yet.

Beermaker profile image
Beermaker in reply tolarry_dammit

Pretty much the same situation here. I started Effexor for hot flashes and found, along with my PCP, that it helped my mood. I still have periods where I lash out at my poor wife for asking me "are you ok?" and that really upsets her. I am on 40mg of Effexor and use Trelstar for ADT. I can't say I like the side effects much, but 6 years out now with PSA <0.1 is wonderful.

in reply toBeermaker

Never ask me if I’m OK , OK???? Just kidding.. How about? Calm down! Ever hear that one? When your ragin you can’t hear anything.. A wise Christian lady friend told me to take a walk out the door and state to yourself 10 things you are grateful for then ten things you like about yourself .. Im was gravelling in self - loathing and pity at the time. I could not think of one thingthat I liked about myself. I hated my self .I was acting out terribly. That was 2yrs ago . Now I’m adjusting.. still no angel .

larry_dammit profile image
larry_dammit

Guys. I’m with you, eating was difficult, wife made a lot of potatoes and Gravy, Long naps, Finally started a journal and restarted my planning for the future ( no matter what ) just bought a UTV and did the sand dunes in Calif. and got a new dog. Amazing how the dog has helped my days and nights. Hang in there I’m 18 months into this and every morning is better 😜😜😜

harryb48 profile image
harryb48 in reply tolarry_dammit

Yup, my dog is a great stabilizing factor in my life! Already had the UTV and put more miles on it than I do my truck!

in reply toharryb48

Lulu my dog is healing me ever second ..

in reply toharryb48

Atv are the s***!

in reply tolarry_dammit

Dammit Larry , your having a good time. UTVs, when in doubt power out! My little lulu the same age is my LOVE .. mans best friend.. You’re on a roll, just don’t roll that UTV ,have fun enjoy life!

cholly75 profile image
cholly75

I haven’t noticed any additional irritability with the 6 month Eligard shots—-I’ve been getting them since 2010. I’m diabetic, though, and when my blood sugar goes low I do become more irritable—and Eligard (Lipton) raises the devil with blood sugar.

Best of luck with your treatments and keep us all posted on your situation.

in reply tocholly75

Cholly,75, nice name! Good luck on the diabetes. That’s a lot . You must be tuff. I just wanted to wish you luck on all fronts....

cholly75 profile image
cholly75 in reply to

Thanks Lulu—I wish I was tougher! Advanced prostate cancer with insulin dependent diabetes is a bad combination because the adt and the prednisone I take with the Zytiga make control of blood sugars very difficult.Many of our comrades on this forum are struggling with the same issue.Much luck to you too!

in reply tocholly75

We’re all the same. Who’s tuff? I used to think I was tuff.. Now I’m a big softy. I’m not happy when I’m in pain. Your fighting on many fronts keep fighting. Hopefully there are some flowers along the way.

buddy0550 profile image
buddy0550

Yes Harry! Thank you as i felt alone. I have had an increase in anxiety and anger. The drs are trying to say i have high blood pressure now,well thats happened from the lupron as never had it before.

I have found that marijuana helps alot, but i look at who i seem to be now and its a far cry from who i was. Lets be honest, much of this could be emotional reaction to this completely unfair thing that assails us. I wish you the best, all we can do is hang on.

in reply tobuddy0550

Raging causes many bad things .. bad hormones that stifle healing.. we are all,supposed to be in zen mode, calm and collect. While ADT and no T grows us in the opposite direction .We’ve lost many of those things that we thought were most important in making us a man before APC. That’s all,our male EGO bullshit. No profit in hating yourself .. This is a phycological thriller. Depression can rule you if you let it. I think you’ll be fine with some adjusting that we all must do.. Compadre!

BigRich profile image
BigRich

Its easy to say, but hard to do. Think positive. Do research; so that, before your treatment fails you have an option.to extent your life. There are things you are no longer able to do well, but concentrate on the thing you can do that bring you joy. Your life has changed, accept it.

Rich

in reply toBigRich

Acceptance is crucial to finding peace.. And the final stage in our grieving process . Without acceptance we can’t heal our selves. Im still fighting it a bit .but much better in the past two months . Hope you will do the same soon..

BigRich profile image
BigRich in reply to

I accepted it 19 years ago. When my wife said." Why did you have to get PCa?"I said. ' Honey someone had to get it. And I am not going quietly into the night." I did research, still do, got the best doctors, used conventional medicine,and supplements and diet. I hope it is longer journey. I like to die with it, and not from it.

Rich

in reply toBigRich

Hey BigRich, “I’m not going quietly into the night. That cracks me up! Have you ever had depression in those 19 years? And how do you feel physically today? I’m the guy with many questions today.. I’ve been reeling emotionally since our friend shuffled off to Buffalo last week saying life with APC ain’t worth living.. I respect his right to choose his own end. But what am I to take from all this? I was feeling great ..Working out following this strong mans advice ..AND then all images erased, the banter and advise ..I still honored him and his help for me . I just wanted to,read his bio again ,and salute this nameless face that I,never had the fortune of meeting IN PERSON .

BigRich profile image
BigRich in reply to

Before a blood draw, a day or two, I get apprehensive. Regarding depression, 10 or 15 minutes, 3 or 4 times a year, total 1 hour for the entire year. I snap out of it quickly, for the good Lord must be looking out for me; for the story of my life is that I make it, just in time. I keep trying. I don't succeed at first, but sooner or later I make it. I have A-Fib, Hypertension,kidney disease, diabetes, and PCa. My life is a balancing act. I believe in God in Heaven. My mother said." God gave you a strong back; so that, you can carry your cross."

Rich

in reply toBigRich

Your mom was right! Reminds me of a song “ up on a tight rope” on both sides fire. Keep balancing . You inspire me..take care..

in reply toBigRich

You’re correct . Everything is easy said or advised. I’m learning from your advise . Appreciate it .

jimhagood profile image
jimhagood

Chemically induced depression. For most of us the depression is moderate, others more acute. In either case, a very serious condition, typically controlled as mentioned by antidepressants.

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