Can't start working on anything - CHADD's Adult ADH...

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Can't start working on anything

Wisso profile image
13 Replies

I'm stuck on my work on every aspect. I prefer sleeping or scrolling and procrastinate. I skipped a ton of deadlines . my manager is the sweetest person on earth and he is understanding but until when.

any tips or tools that could help me start working on anything?

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Wisso profile image
Wisso
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13 Replies
Quincie profile image
Quincie

Usually financial need solves this one , the fear of losing your job & not be able to pay bills is a powerful motivator. Eventually your manager's patience will run out so you need to tackle this.

I suggest picking the time of day you have the most brain energy & focus. Then instead of looking at the entire project & being overwhelmed, start doing easier things. Nibble at the edges every day. At some point you will find something you don't understand or need more information - ask for the info/explanation. It will show you are actually working on it.

Do whatever you can to get into that hyper focused zone. I listen to podcasts to get into the zone - listening - not watching.

If your phone is a distraction put it somewhere else. If you work in an office leave it at home for the day.

Wisso profile image
Wisso in reply to Quincie

thank you! the thing is that I work remotely from home so that pins me to my self discipline most of the time. I will work on it and try to make small treats when I finish small tasks

Quincie profile image
Quincie in reply to Wisso

yes working from home is harder when it comes to self discipline. Rewarding yourself after you finish something - or have made definite progress helps. You could also try a Pomodoro app. It is a timer giving you 25 mins blocks of time with 5 minute breaks & every hour it gives you 10 or 15 min break. I can't handle doing this all day but it helps me for a couple of hours.

A lot of my work is not very interesting but it can be complicated. I have to trick myself into getting it done. Best wishes to you.

Wisso profile image
Wisso in reply to Quincie

Thank you for your support! best wishes for you

Frillseeker profile image
Frillseeker

I'm hearing you! Self employed and working from home...Today in my despair I finally subscribed unlimited with Focusmate for buddy doubling and found Beeminder and merged these together. My goal is 5x day a week 9am start work - locked in with focusmate / and when I skip I need to pay Beeminder $5 if I derail... Let's see if that does the trick... Accountability buddies are my hope... There are 3x free sessions per week with focusmate if you want to try it out... And you can choose any task you want...

And for my morning routine I use RoutineFlow another app... That helps me to get the f... Out of bed... To keep on track what I supposed to do! Obviously skipping some now on a regular basis and end up on the phone and before I know it... the morning is gone... Hence the serious measures :) I wouldn't employ myself 🤣

For me a big factor is to go to bed on time to get a decent sleep and to get physical exercise the day, otherwise I'm scattered... But that is so boring...

There are prob better and free routine apps, I paid $30 for the year for that one coz I couldn't work out the free version apparently available...

All the best

MaudQ profile image
MaudQ

Agree about choosing what work to do based on energy levels throughout the day. Also for me anything with colors, sounds, lil boxes to check - basically anything that gamifies work helps. I’d also explore working in a coffee shop or co-work space. Try bundling unpreferred tasks with something fun. Like a podcast or audiobook that you can only listen to while you do a certain task. I always have a candy after lunch. Accept that your brain will get bore d of one strategy after a while and switch it up. Get up, take breaks. Try radically simplifying other expectations - like eating the same breakfast or lunch every day - so your brain doesn’t get “tired out.” Steve Jobs had a closet full of black turtle necks. I’d also consider investing in an executive functioning coach. It’s not cheap but it’s cheaper than losing your job or missing out on promotions. Finally, if you’re not on medication look into it and if you are maybe it needs a tweak. Oh - also drop any notion that “willpower” or work ethic or some BS like that is the issue. Practicing self compassion will make you wayyy more productive than negativity. And don’t put all your energy into “fixing” your weaknesses - lean into really playing up your strengths.

PinkPanda23 profile image
PinkPanda23 in reply to MaudQ

"And don’t put all your energy into 'fixing' your weaknesses - lean into really playing up your strengths."

Yes, yes, yes! We are so hard on ourselves to perform as neurotypicals do, and they encourage us to feel guilt, shame, and fear because we can't. The places where I've thrived are the ones that let me work my way, to my strengths. The places that I've failed were places that required I do things a certain way, in certain order, with specific documentation, no individual strengths encouraged. Of course, it made a difference having my diagnosis at age 54. Before, I didn't really know what the problem was or how to approach it. Finding my sweet spots after diagnosis was a great task, but with tremendous benefits. Now I'm retired, and the boss isn't breathing down my neck. Much, much calmer!

samami profile image
samami in reply to MaudQ

great advice !

Ampersand1 profile image
Ampersand1

You may be facing the same comorbidity as me, depression. Whether the cause is personal or work related, I found tremendous help when I talked to my psychiatrist about my struggles of even getting out of bed. Later I learned to recognize my issues as a sort of ADHD induced form of burnout (this was before I got my ADHD diagnosis and was while I was attending grad school a few years back).

Medicine has made a big difference for me to function and regain control of my work personal life/motivation. Other comments here are outstanding advice as well and should be your go-to first solutions to try, especially if you are not one to typically respond well to medicines and would prefer to avoid this option altogether. There's no right or wrong answer, but I can totally relate to your experience and wish you find some respite from the suffering you're facing.

MaudQ profile image
MaudQ in reply to Ampersand1

Can you explain ADHD burnout? I think this happens to me - either after I’ve worked really hard on something or had to manage something complicated. But I’ve never known what to do about it

Ampersand1 profile image
Ampersand1 in reply to MaudQ

I've honestly been on a long journey trying to answer this question for myself. I feel like I could write a whole book about it but let me boil it down to a few points of what I understand ADHD burnout to be and then a few resources I found useful. 1. No two people experience burnout the same.

2. Anyone can suffer burnout, but the ADHD brain exacerbates the risk of getting it.

3. Burnout doesn't happen in a way you can easily recognize. It's really something that evolves over a period of time and is easiest to recognize in hindsight.

4. FOMO (fear of missing out) seems to be a combination of ADHD and individual personality tendencies that can be an underlying cause of burnout, at least for me.

For my specific experience, "opportunity" was abound around me. I wanted to join school clubs, learn about how to build a startup, make new friends, play with my dog, spend time with my family, and also condense a 24 month degree into just 12 months. From the outside, it may be obvious even that something has to give because there just isn't enough time in the day to "do it all." And that's where my previously undiagnosed ADHD did me a bit of disservice, because I thought, nah, why should I have to choose, I can do all of these and just be a little extra tired at the end of my day. So went the first 4-5 months in this manner and before I knew it, even though I was constantly excited by learning new things and following my passions, for the first time in my life, I found myself EXACTLY like how the OP describes above. I had trouble motivating myself to get out of bed even to go to class. I missed deadlines on homework, and then I even started feeling like it was unfair that I couldn't have the energy to keep up with attending everything and there must be someone else to blame. I became frustrated and felt hopeless, blah blah blah.

Treating for depression was a good first step, but it was like treating a symptom without knowing the root cause. I read some books and listened to some podcasts which began to help me make sense of my experience. "Fried: The Burnout Podcast" gave me the first dose of validation that other people are experiencing the same type thing as me. A book by Anne Helen Peterson called "Can't Even" was my next stop which helped me realize why it is so frustrating and difficult to point blame for this suffering to any one thing (it's a societal issue). Then I read "The Good Enough Job" by Simone Stolzoff which gave me fresh perspective into many different stories of other 30 somethings working a wide variety of different jobs handled their own experience with burnout.

I hope this helps some. Burnout is just overcommitting to things you want to do but realistically don't have time to devote energy to each thing. ADHD burnout is the same, just adding ADHD into the discussion because the passion people with ADHD have to experience or do more of the things they find fascinating can make it that much harder to prioritize (executive functioning challenges) and the tendency of hyperfocus can make it nearly impossible to pull back and reexamine how this overcommitment is ultimately affecting your health. It's tough for us!

DeaDeiCarboidrati profile image
DeaDeiCarboidrati

For me, my inability to initiate tasks was the anxiety that was comorbid with my ADHD. Concerta helps me focus, but I needed a low dose of Zoloft to help me get over the hump!

CMax3001 profile image
CMax3001

Habits and discipline are not easy skills to learn, especially with adhd, but not impossible and Ive found are invaluable for managing my adhd.

Starting with the basics, eating food regularly and sleeping enough hours. These are the hardest ones, but they help everything else so much! Gives you energy to have things like will power. Plus, they provide a foundation to add new habits onto. As body gets used to them, so can help time management too. Creating slots of time that things happen. Such as only scrolling during lunch. Or taking medications on time with a meal or snack. Set an alarm as reminders of stuff coming up, like sleep, a wind down routine of 1-2 hours b4 attempting sleep. All that stuff contributes to whether you can stop scrolling or not.

You just have to properly try, not giving yourself grief if its not perfect first time, and gently perservering. Its a marathon not a sprint. Built one block at a time.

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