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Having untreated ADD while Fire Department training

LaughingLatka profile image
9 Replies

Hello, I am new here and wanted to share a little about myself. I was diagnosed with ADD as a child and took Ritalin for about 3 years, but did not like the way it made me feel so I have been medication free for 30 years which I thought that was something to be proud of and I’m not sure why. I have always displayed symptoms of inattentiveness, unable to focus when people are speaking to me, difficulty reading and about every other severe symptom in the book I am reading “Taking Charge of Adult ADHD” by Russell A. Barkley. For the past 7 years I have noticed myself getting more frustrated and irritated with many things going on in my life and thought it was normal to be that way. I never took a deep dive into my learning disabilities until 2 months ago when I was separated from Seattle Fire Dept during Recruit Training, I was devastated as it took years to get accepted into the program only to watch myself crumble and fail. I worked so hard and practiced every manipulative drill tirelessly but always seemed to miss an important step in the process on test day. Even though I knew what to do, my brain would not process each sequence of motions like I needed it to. I did not tell the training cadre about having ADD during recruit school because I was ashamed and did not want to be treated any differently than the other recruits. I was treated poorly because of my slow learning in the public school system growing up and thought this would be different because of maturity and life experience , sadly I was wrong. The takeaway from this negative outcome is that I am now in an ADD support group, I speak with a therapist weekly and have an appointment with a psychiatric NP next week to get on medication. I was fortunate enough to get on with another fire department and will start their academy in January. I would love to hear if anyone has has had a similar experience in the emergency medical/firefighting/ police field.

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LaughingLatka
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9 Replies
75ADHDgal profile image
75ADHDgal

I completly understand an empathize with you. I am 76 and ws never diagnosed with ADHD until I was in my 50's. I knew there were "issues" growing up but comlcating matters wa taht I also had udianosd progressive hering loss and felt "stupis" msot of the time. I cannot spell for th elife of me and also transpspose numbers and letters frequently. I was "let go of three Nurse Practitioner positions due to ADHD issues I know.

The way I was diagnosed was - One Sunday I was reading the NY times magazine section- thre was a story about a woman of above average intelligence who could not hold down a ob becuse she kept intrupting her co- workers and failed to complete her work in anthing like a timely manner ane had issues with time management in general. She also intrrupted folks.

I thoght OMG that is me! I was seeing a Thepist who sent me to a Neuropsycihiatrist at t Kaiser in Hayward CA and dot diagnosis of ADHD predominatly inattentive type

I was on Stimulant meds for years until 3 years ago when My Cardiologist said no because I have a cardiac Arrhythmia and also mild hyupertenison - I tried the non stimlats and they did not help

I am a medical professional and frankly take High CBD Cannabis to help my ADHD symptoms. Also have taken ADult ADHD management groups teice - helpful

Boolks are good but do not subsitute for talking and being with others in same sitiuation

DO NOT BLAME YOUSELF ! Even if you took the medications they help but do not cure . I stillhad ADHD issues on Concerta, adderal etc. Also can get an ADHD coach

Blue_186281_red profile image
Blue_186281_red

I'm a home health nurse and after 12 years I still fumble through hands on things like wound care procedures. I forget various items and need to wash hands, go back to supply bag, probably come off as unprofessional lots of times. I always imagined if I was at a clinic with the same physical lay out I would be able to learn by muscle memory and forget less stuff. I teach my patients all the time to drill things like reaching for their new walker when they stand up, or physically going through their new morning routine of going the the bathroom & standing on the scale, writing down wt for new CHF pts. It sounds like this may apply to some of your learning if you are training on specific procedures. There's a reason you don't forget how to ride a bike - muscle memory uses an older part of your brain that is less susceptible to memory problems. I don't see how ADHD would be a downside for a fire dept. I bet the field attracts a lot of us. I would explain and ask if you can have extra access to facilities to practice.

LaughingLatka profile image
LaughingLatka in reply toBlue_186281_red

Hi Blue,

Thanks for sharing that with me. Yes , you’re right the thing that most attracts me to the fire department is the intense focus you need in running calls, treating patients and doing every other task there is in the field. My main problem during the academy was that I didn’t get enough time to really master each skill as it takes me longer than most people to get things perfect. Do you feel like there are some skills that you do so perfect without thinking in your field??

Blue_186281_red profile image
Blue_186281_red in reply toLaughingLatka

Doing things "perfect" is complicated. I am actually in the hiring process for dialysis. Homehealth is corrupt AF - see my post from a couple weeks ago. My compensation tools make me better than my co-workers at case management if you look at how medicare defines my responsibilities BUT F'ed metrics make me bad at my job from management's perspective. I am at the point where i don't forget stuff during my pt interactions cuz so many things trigger my memory BUT my effency & professional appearance is poor cuz i often forget dumb stuff until the last min. e.g. I'm all set up for blood draw, but then remember sharps container in car, Then after I get it I realize i need a bandaid! I think these procedural problems would go away in a well organized clinic, but each pt's house is different and i can't create a routine.

LaughingLatka profile image
LaughingLatka in reply toBlue_186281_red

that sounds a lot like me, having tall things set up and ready and then I noticed that I’ve missed one thing in the process. Do you take medication? I’m going to get prescribed medication this Saturday and am very excited about it

Blue_186281_red profile image
Blue_186281_red in reply toLaughingLatka

I'm on Adderall. It helps, but only augments my existing habits and stops distraction. I imagined fire dept has very strictly organized supplies. It's tough, but if you can maintain a specific set up, I don't think you need to remember as much cuz it becomes habit. Each time you set up, i would physically touch each supply, even if you don't need to interact with it, and say it out loud. It'll become like a rote prayer. Every time i leave anywhere i say "phone, wallet, keys, chapstick." And pat my pockets to check. Havn"t called AAA for a lockout in years!

LaughingLatka profile image
LaughingLatka

thank you Blue, that will be helpful for me in the next fire academy starting in January, saying everything out loud so I don’t skip a step. Yes the FD is very detail oriented and there is no room for error which makes it difficult for people with ADHD.

The1Path profile image
The1Path

Laughing Latka, anyone can make a mistake or stumble while dealing with ADHD. Sounds like you’re taking steps to get back on track - grit and perseverance are your friends!

While I’m not in the EMT field, I continue to have a good career- some stumbles & goofs aside, like everyone.

The stimulants help with your brain’s executive function and have been a godsend to me. BUT they can’t fix all the issues.

That’s where ADHD lifestyle management (exercise, regular sleep, eating right) *and* learning how to self-manage your condition come in.

Setting up healthy self management habits / systems / checklists have been key for me.

I leverage my hyperfocus superpower to read / listen to ADHD books & videos that teach me how to excel despite an atypical brain.

In addition, organizing my home / apartment so that it’s optimized for an ADHD person has been hugely helpful. There are probably some parallels to setting yourself up at the workplace, as Blue_186281_red has mentioned above.

I highly recommend Organizing Solutions for People with ADHD, 2nd Edition-Revised and Updated: Tips and Tools to Help You Take Charge of Your Life and Get Organized by Susan C. Pinsky. It’s mostly pictures of how to / how not to set up your home.

Good luck! You can do just about anything if you set your mind to it & get some support!

LaughingLatka profile image
LaughingLatka in reply toThe1Path

Thank you for the positive energy, I really value it. I’m also going to check out those books you referred me to as I’m always looking for different methods to help me out. Unfortunately our house is always pretty crazy because we have three young kids and I know a major issue for me is getting off task because I feel the urgent need to clean up and this totally puts me through a tailspin of inattentiveness and anxiety and losing focus on what I initially was trying to accomplish . So figuring out a way to deal with clutter and be ok with it will be helpful for me.

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