The marathon

[arne123]

I've pretty much been through it all. Abusive narcissistic parents, being cast out, bullied, fired and moved to 8 different homes. Losing everything and rebuilding it seems to have become a routine.

It's like a marathon where I run in circles and learn the same things from the same mistakes, while everyone else are miles ahead.

"You just have to...", they all say.

It devours me. I've fixed my depression numerous times. I've gotten the answer all my problems, later to be just a few.

At this moment I'm a robot, whose sole purpose is to get to work, pay bills, clean the house and keep a tight budget. Distractions like friends or hobbies can no longer interfere.

And yet here I am, unable to funcion properly in my job, pay my bills, clean the house or keep a budget, even though I've dedicated my life to it.

Thanks for reading, just needed to write it out...

[dubstepMaul]

Hiya, thanks for sharing. Are you seeing a psychiatrist and are you taking any med? Maybe you need a life coach. Check out Russell Barkley videos on YouTube, some of them are long but worth it. Also Jessica McCabe's "How To ADHD" channel videos are fantastic. She did a Ted Talk too.

Hope things get better for you. God bless.

[J3616]

I pretty much do the same thing too. Most people have no idea that outside of work I don't do much not because I don't want to but because just keeping up with daily work and chores takes all my energy.

I try to manage my ADHD naturally and I do ok but if I fall off the wagon do to distractions such as family visiting I have to start all over again.

It can be lonely but I try to keep my relationship with God. That can be hard too just due to the nature of this condition.

Just know there is someone out there that totally understands.

[zonarosso]

It's good to get it out and this is a great place to do it. Everyone here really wants to help, even if it's just listening, which is sometimes what I need most. I 'think it out' as I speak because it's hard to do in my head. Life for me has always been 2 steps forward, stop, adjust whats needs to be adjust, go back one step and start again. I'm fortunate that I love to learn so I do a LOT of research on what makes me tick and how to deal with a society that doesn't understand me. For me it's come down to enjoying the simple things. Quiet, meditation, music (my passion), watching the critters around the house and working all by myself on my latest motorcycle project. I don't need much else now. Take care man. Summers coming

[Timster]

I hear you