My boyfriend and I both have ADD/ADHD... - CHADD's Adult ADH...

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My boyfriend and I both have ADD/ADHD but I HATE his medications

Miles2Go profile image
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Hi there! I was diagnosed with adult ADHD-mixed type about 6 months after graduating from college. I spent much of my life thinking life was just going to be harder for me, but that’s a matter for another day.

I’m here today because I am in the best relationship of my life and it provides me with excessive happiness and support, but we are both pre-med students and both have attention disorders. He technically has ADD (despite the changes in DSM-5). He has been on meds a few years longer than me. I take Concerta and he takes Adderall. The issue is that I hate what Adderall does to my boyfriend. He hates it too, but it’s the only thing that works for him and without it he probably won’t get to or through med school and he will make an amazing doctor I my opinion. He gets cold and standoffish (sp?) when he takes his meds. We are both in a very stressful school period now so it’s understandable, but I’ve been having a hard time lately with not taking his adderall moods personally. I should also mention that he manages his meds very responsibly and is very educated on mech of action etc. So abuse of said meds is not a worry currently.

Thank you for listening😊

2 Replies
rach1402 profile image

It must be difficult for you when he's blowing hot and cold cos you never know where you are when someone is like that with you. I feel his pain though, I was diagnosed with ADHD in January last year, just before turning 36! It's not well understood here in the UK so I had to pretty much diagnose myself and then get it confirmed officially by a psychiatrist. I take concerta XL, I don't like how it changes me either but I can't function properly without it unfortunately. Doctors over here tend not to prescribe dex to adults, we're decades behind the likes of the US and Australia here. I do find that I can manage my own dose each morning according to what I'm doing that day though. For example if I have to work or do a lot of driving I take my full dose, if I'm having a lazy day at home with the kids and want to relax I skip a day and if I need to get things done but don't want to be too serious and unemotional I take a lower dose. That's the good thing about ADHD medication, you have more flexibility because it's relatively short acting and has no cumulative effect. It's great that you're so happy with your boyfriend, presumably he was already on the meds when you guys met so try to remember why you fell in love with him and try to understand that he has to get the balance right for him so he can have a bright future. I wish I had found out I had ADHD when I was younger, my life would have been so much easier and maybe I would have reached my potential in life instead of being in a dead end job with a broken marriage behind me and no contact with my family.

I wish you both the best of luck, both with your careers and your relationship x

Hi good luck

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