My son has ADHD but does amazing academically. He has "no problems" as long as he is medicated (according to teachers). He has major restraint collapse as soon as I pick him up from school.
The psychiatrist has recommended that he needs an IEP in place. The school/teachers do not think this is necessary because he is smart and academically has no trouble. He is in grade 3 and I have been advocating for him since he started school in Kindergarten.
My question is when should I stop pushing for something that the "professionals" don't seem to think he needs.... or should I move forward with accommodations that would benefit him.
Thanks in advance for your help!
-One tired mom
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SSpoozak
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Welcome to the group. It is great that you have been able to set things up for your son. You could consider setting up a 504 educational plan. This is a plan that follows your son even after he graduates high school.
You can write in accommodations for all educational environments. This can cover times like state testing and everyday needs in the classroom.
It is my advice to set things up as soon as possible and not wait, you may be able to avoid negative experiences.
The reason to ask for an assessment for an IEP is becuase your child has needs that are not being address and he needs goals written to help him learn.
I second the 504 plan. It sounds like he needs something before he burns himself out. I would push until my kid gets what he needs. Have his psychiatrist write a letter with their recommendations and see if that gets you anywhere.
All schools are different obviously..but i have found it to be very difficult to get my daughter the support she needs and she has an IEP for adhd and a reading disability (it was originally a 504 before i asked the school to evaluate her). Even though she is failing her language arts class, they refuse most suggestions because shes intelligent and can perform well "when she tries." Shes trying hard all the time..to sit still, pay attention, focus on things shes not interested in, to plan and stay organized..etc. shes now having panic attacks and no matter how much i tell them she needs more support because the current expectations are taking a huge toll on her..im met with..but shes smart. Hopefully your sons school is more receptive.
that’s really too bad. My son has an iep because his behavior was so out of control in kindergarten before he was diagnosed and medicated. He has never struggled academically. It’s unfair to those that didn’t act out that they can’t get the services they need. Has he ever been evaluated by the school? If not, you can request that in writing and they are obligated to do the evaluation which hopefully could uncover the gaps that you know are there that they don’t see since he does a good job masking them (from what it sounds)
Have you thought about what would be in an IEP? IEP exists to provide intensive support so that kiddos with disabilities can get equal access to education. They’re for things like OT and 1:1 support because without those things a kiddo wouldn’t have the same access to education as a kid without a disability. What supports do you think your son needs?
You could also research 504, which puts in place accommodations that the teacher can manage without professionals.
But both of them come back to: without these things, is your kid getting educated? If not, then push. If yes, they will probably deny.
All that said - if you have made a formal request in writing for an IEP eval they are required by law to answer you in writing and either give you an eval or explain their denial, which you can then appeal. Have you made the request formally? You can find templates for the request online if needed.
At the end of the day, even if they do an eval they might find that he doesn’t need services. If he is managing academically then it’s likely they will find him not eligible. But if it would help your peace of mind, you could push them to do the legal process. Which means everything in writing and having a chance to appeal.
Thank you- I’m just beginning and I really don’t know what everything means. I do have a list of accommodations- like seating, etc. that would help him not burn out. He’s masking. They say “he’s fine as long as he’s medicated” so ??? I don’t get it - if he’s compliant he’s fine? According to them?
continue to advocate for your child because you have that right and the schools know that. Have the Dr write the recommendation and ask for a meeting to be held to address your concerns and requests. Also look up the parent rights guidelines for your school district and request a student advocate to help you. I hope this info helps .
My son is a special education teacher and he feels that proper IEP is very important but each year you should go over all the details with the teachers to see what needs to be changed or modified. It is all good and to help him. I think I heard my son say it is easy to cancel the IEP but harder to get it started back up after cancelling. So if I was you I would look at all the details on the iEP... extra time... and figure out what is best for him and take advantage of any extra help you can get from the IEP program. Use it to your sons advantage.
Hello, you're receiving great responses from others. I will just say (mom of 8 yo boy with ADHD, music teacher in the 'system'- don't have regular classroom)- push for a 504 and then continue to follow up to make sure your son is getting what his 504 says. Be pushy, be persistent, edit the 504 to be more specific if needed. My son had an IEP since he was 3 for speech and behavior. The speech part was what kept him on an IEP. He tested out of it and got a 504 this year. Neither documents were ever followed, he never has received the accommodations on the documents. I don't push as hard as I should. I have a student recently diagnosed and his dad is calling the person in charge of his 504 to make sure teachers are giving him accommodations. This is good, and should happen more often. To be honest, teachers most likely won't follow it unless pressed. Teachers will sit in meetings and nod their heads all day long but when the realities of daily stress kick in, they simply won't/can't help your child the way they should. I have difficulty being a part of the 'system' that doesn't serve kids the way it should.
I going to give you my perspective as the mom of a high school junior: fight to get an IEP put in place now. The 504 plan simply does not carry the legal weight that an IEP does.
In our experience, the work in elementary school wasn't too challenging... it was everything else that it takes a body/mind to get through a day out in public. It gets real in middle school when the kids have the lethal combo of more challenging work + social dynamics + hormones. I hate to tell you this, but for me, the elementary years were the easy years. By far.
Request a full eval (a neuropsychologial evaluation if your disctrict will pay for one - otherwide consider paying for one yourself) and see what the results are. Request a speech evaluation and an OT evaluation too. As other responders have said, you are well within your rights to request this as a parent, and you've got your psychiatrist making this recommendation.
Like I am imagining will happen to you, our educational evaluation results were in the range of normal (though with slow processing speed). What surprised us was that the speech language pathologist found something odd in her results, and that is how my kiddo qualified for the IEP. I was then able to fight for placement in a resource room in lieu of study hall for high school (which frankly might have saved my kid's life).
I'm sharing this with you and the community because back in elementary school I didn't know what I didn't know. I didn't know that our classroom teachers would pay attention to an IEP but disregard a 504 plan. I needed a wise older mom to guide me on the right path. I hope that this helps. Good luck.
I very much agree with the response! Now that we’re half way through the middle school years, the elementary years seemed “easy.” The middle school transition is where the “shit hits the fan” with more academic demands, social uncertainty and the hormone complications. Definitely push to get a 504 in place. Request a full evaluation- across all functional and academic areas. We had an outside neuro psych that we paid for, the school did an evaluation and IEP was drafted in 5th grade. Middle school transition was a nightmare. We ultimately hired an advocate who made the school do a FULL evaluation which showed needs in other areas (pragmatic language, sensory processing etc) that were not addressed.
Hello, I would push for the 504 plan. While he is doing well academically now, as he gets older, schoolwork may become more challenging and accommodations could be needed.
I also needed to push our county to provide the 504 plan, but used the psychological assessment (and eventually a screenshot of the state law) to do so. While my daughter was ahead academically at the start of the year, as symptoms increased, her academic progress began to decline and we soon found accommodations listed within her 504 and referenced by her therapist, are needed for her to succeed.
It's always best to have and not need, than to not have at all and fight for it later potentially resulting in further delays.
I’m a special education teacher. Not all of my students have academic goals (math and ela). Some are strictly for behavior and social work needs. My daughter is in that boat. She does well academically but has strong rejection sensitivity and it is her lose friendships. She probably won’t qualify for an IEP because she,like me, masks a lot of her issues in her moment, but then get burnout and high anxiety. She does have a 504 to allow her a break twice a day if she likes and social work/OT services. You could try to have a booster mid day if you think it may help, but I would request in writing that he be checked for 504 services and have a list of your concerns and what your kid has said bothers him at school.
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