My son gets a iep and still failing, not sure what to do.

[MelissaJones]

My son is in the third grade and unable to write a sentence or even spell a word without a lot of redirecting. He receives a IEP and his teachers aloud him to easily get distracted. He has called way behind in school, all his peers are on another level even in his resource class he is extremely behind. I go to his school and sit in with him when I'm not at work to assure he does his work. There so many days that I can't be with him and the school system is failing him his work never gets done he just sits there in class, I've seen it with my own eyes. I'm not sure what to do to help him he does not focus at all when it comes to school work.

[MDobson]

I am new here, but is your son on any medications for his adhd?

[Hidden]

My 11 year old is also behind he gets pulled out for rsp twice a day and his grades are modified so on report card he can't get anything lower than a C

[Adhd-mom]

Has the school done the proper assessments (by trained professional) to see if there are any other learning disabilities besides adhd?

Is he currently receiving any behavioral therapy /CBT and or medication to help him?

[Mommyofahero]

How about asking school if he can have a resource aid. Sometimes private & Charter schools dont offer it because its a cost out of there pocket. Your son has rights & school needs to deliver what he needs. God bless

[CobraKid04]

Hi Melissa,

My son was diagnosed with ADD in 1st grade (Take 2) but was still struggling even with medications. The summer before the 3td grade he was tested and diagnosed with Dyslexia and Dyscalculia. I thought that this diagnosis was the missing piece of the puzzle. However, our struggle had just began. Our doctor referred us to The Payne Education Center. It is a local resource that provides support and education for adults that wish to help children with learning differences. You can email them and see if they know of resources in your area as their network is vast. You can go to payneeducationcenter.org and send a message to them under the Contact tab at the top of the page.

You may also search your area for a program called Take Flight. Its a reading program that is designed for students with dyslexia. It can help with the reading and letter recognition issues. Most programs for dyslexia suggest that children learn to write in cursive so they begin to understand where words begin and end.

Another fabulous resource that I refer back to ALL THE TIME is Dr. Russell Barkley. He has several great videos you can look at on YouTube. The one I suggest is: ADHD - The 30 Essential Ideas everyone needs to know. It is broken into 27 segments so you can stop and start easily. Here is the link for it: youtube.com/playlist?list=P...

Another thing I do with my son is the use of audio books. He listens to the audio book while he follows along in the hard copy. This helps him retain the information while learning to recognize words. There is a program called bookshare.org that is “an accessible online library for people with print disabilities”. You have to fill out a form and have the disability confirmed by a teacher. You can also get audio books from the public library as well.

I hope these resources help. If you have questions about these resources let me know.

[greenlunch]

My son is now in High school and we are still in the same place! So get help NOW !

You have the right to a IEE, a full test. Also get educated yourself, meet with an advocate or educational lawyer to see what you can do. wrightslaw.com

School only gets harder and even with IEP they push them through but in HS there are limited accommodation and my son is failing! I'm looking into other school, at Fusions a 1:1 school to catch him up, summer school and he started Mathnasium. You need to be the squeaky wheel to get help, they will not offer it unless you ask! .

I wish I had pushed harder when my son was younger so he would not be in such a mess now! Do not make your child struggle or feel shamed for having learning differences!

Focus on what they are good at, ADD could be their greatest gift !

[greenlunch]

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March 2019

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[Janice_H]

Hello, sadly this happens frequently. The good thing is you are recognizing this and seem ready to take action. Contact your school district special education office to advise them of your concerns. Request an urgent IEP meeting and have the district representative attend the meeting. Prepare a list of all of your concerns. They will have to make modifications to his IEP to bring him up to level. If they are not successful you can request a non-public placement at a school with a smaller teacher to student ratio. The district will have to pay for the placement if it is approved. If you feel there still is no progress, contact your local Disability Rights Law center or seek counsel.

[bdhb96]

Hi MelissaJones (might want to protect your son’s future privacy and not use a real name here 😄),

So glad you found this resource! Lots of us have experience with your situation and have ideas for you.

1- Get professional help for meds & therapy ASAP. ADHD brains are different and need meds to focus. Dr Barkley (mentioned by another poster) is really helpful at explaining this. Note that some times his descriptions of ADHD kids and teens are on the more extreme end so don’t freak out. A blanket description is not all people with ADHD.

2- It’s common to have co-morbid situations. ADHD and dyslexia are very common together. Request testing from your school district ASAP. There’s usually a wait list. Private testing may be more thorough and informative though ($2.5k and up). Know that this important report becomes your paperwork basis for requesting support services from the school for the next few years. Very important. Get that IEP in place ASAP.

3- Try to use words like “struggling” rather than failing. I know, it’s semantics, but there’s no hope in the word fail. It sounds permanent. While the word struggle seems temporary. It’s going to be important for your son (who will overhear it at some point), others involved (teachers, family, etc), and very much yourself. It’s an attitude. And your son, with the meds and all the school accommodations can end up with basically an existential crisis (it’s true). You want a positive viewpoint going into these years. I’m sorry to break the news, because you need to learn from our slow responding mistakes, but this is the beginning of a years long process. We all get burnout. But know that this struggle is temporary while he makes his way through this forced system of education. After high school he will make choices that work for him. There’s many paths in life to success and happiness!

4- Be sure to support his interest in other things outside of school. He won’t be thriving in the classroom so he needs to thrive elsewhere. He’s interested in Scouts, in sports, in animals, in cooking, in science, in fishing, in what ever...support it as much as possible. Create that space for him where he can thrive. Very important.

5- Know that schools may not allow a student to repeat a grade unless (amazingly) they’re TWO grades behind. I was shocked when I found out this was our large public school’s rule of thumb. Two grades! Also, I learned from a friend who’s a teacher that regular ed teachers are not allowed to suggest to parents that a student may have dyslexia or other conditions. A teacher can heavily imply to parents this is the case, but they can’t say the words of the condition. Crazy! The district hasn’t trained regular ed classroom teachers to asses these things and once identified, the district has to provide services. When my older child with ADHD was in those early school grades, I wrongly assumed her older very experienced teachers would recognize what the problem was and let me know. Nope! They kept talking about how my quiet introverted kid looked busy at her desk...but didn’t turn in any work. Spelling was wild and writing composition were really behind. Surely with 25 yrs of teaching experience they could recognize what was happening and let the parents know. With my younger child with ADHD, I don’t wait for teachers this bring it up first because time is precious. Also, know the acronym FAPE. Your student has rights to an education.

6- Create strong routines in your home. Self care routines, chores and responsibilities, etc. ADHD brains need this repeated over and over in order to do it automatically. Don’t expect that the first ten times will get the routine established. It will take 50+ times but they’ll get it eventually. Don’t lose hope!

7- Be on the watch for anxiety. Most kids have anxiety today sadly, but for our ADHD kids it’s a huge concern. Untreated ADHD and dyslexia can become generalized anxiety. When unaddressed for years, the anxiety can become even more of a serious concern than ADHD and dyslexia. And know that for young active kids, especially boys, the anxiety may look like being physically out of control. It may involve harming others or himself, uncontrollable anger, and similar. I was really surprised by this. Don’t let this creep up on you, be on the watch. Anxiety meds are pretty effective so within 2-3 months of starting them you can see relief.

I hope these tips from my years of going through this will help you. Know that you’re not alone!