Help!!!

[Warrior-1]

I'm new to this so don't really know where to start my child has recently been diagnosed with ADHD also has Autism Anxiety. Strategies were put into place for me to give the School from the pediatrician. So I've spoken to the school SENCO and so far None of the strategies have been put into place. So I've ask the SENCO about him needing a break Inbetweeners doing his work Because he's getting into trouble. for destructing the class. The SENCO told me he has to indicate to the teacher he needs a Break by telling the teacher Which he finds hard? because of his anxiety. And when I've ask if he needs a break, where will he take himself off to? somewhere safe. The reply back I got from the SENCO was he would have to walk him self around the school corridors. With no supervision. Which I am very concerned about because he's run out of school before and the school didn't even bother to tell me I only found out when. the police knock at my door. To tell me my 10-year-old son has run out of Primary school.. I really need help. And not geting any I feel the School, are just Fobbing me off. Because they know I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be doing because I'm new to this. All I want is for my child to Get the help he needs but I feel hopeless I can't help him. it's making me feel depressed.

[Emommaber71]

First, this school sounds like a joke. Bad suggestions for your son, beating around the bush with their replys no real solutions. Have you had him tested? Have his pediatrician order a full evaluation on him . My sons school only wanted to do a partial evaluation. I pushed for full and got it. Make an appointment with his doc tell him all you have said here. Your son I feel showing crys for help. This is horrible to read that his school has been irresponsible to help your son. After testing have him referred to a child psychologist and psychiatrist. Express the way you feel speak up for him to professionals Doctors who can help him. The psychologist can order learning disabilities test. After that results, and then you choose to keep him at said school or move him. In ohio We have it set up that if you're in an under performing school district you can receive a scholarship to a better school even private schools also we have what's called the John Peterson scholarship which is not based on income and allows children with IEPs which is what he could get after being that diagnosed attend a better school. That all for free. Then log on to your state's Department of Education website make some phone calls to them tell them what you're experiencing at your school they need to know. It's not easy. But he deserves better, sounds like your already helping reaching out to this forum. Keep the faith. It will be work alot for you. Get a folder type system label each one to hold notes and paperwork. Document everything about this school. If your not in the position to move or have another open enrollment school near by, seek other options with your states education department. I hope I've helped. Good luck

[trinitylynn53]

First if you “have to remind him, and forgets” everything that is exactly what you will see. For personal experience not judgement! Visuals help our family greatly. Color coding tacks for the entire fam so he doesn’t feel like the black sheep. Help him be patient with himself and the most helpful tip I can personally say changed our lives is teaching him DEEP BREATHING! It’s so simple yet so very powerful. If you have Video games YOGA games are priceless for yoga is nothing short of life changing. Another #1 tip is remember he is PERFECT just the way he is. Pay attention to ur vocabulary many times we as parents point things out to them and then the problem gets bigger. Like, oh he’s so shy.” But when family is gone they have no shyness at all. #1A. Help him learn to ask for what his body&mimd need to get back on track. Does he need to run a lap around the house/gym? #1B. Water is vital for him. I hope this helps. I could go on and on. The main thing is clear consistent boundaries, with lots of POSITIVE reinforcements- LOTS. There is SO much info available please keep in mind he is a child don’t up and Except him to change his world over night. Have a conversation WITH him and help him figure out his most prominent struggle is right now. You could choose one for school and one for home. Come up with a plan that he can learn to do for himself and then how those around him can help him. He can remind himself to watch his breathing to regain control of himself in the classroom and an adult can GENTLY and DISCRETELY GIVE A VISUAL/verbal cue. Make this as fun as possible come up with “code words” that only he knows. Most importantly LOVE HIM he is not broken and hold him accountable for himself. Have him come all the way back downstairs to pick up that towel or turn that light off- because you KNOW HE CAN! Not everything you try is going to work and it’s ok. Make sure you notice when he turns that light off on his own

[Aspen797]

It sounds as though you might be in the UK and not the USA. I’m not familiar with the laws in the UK governing special educational needs but it sounds as though you need help enforcing your child’s educational plan. In the USA there is a law that provides appeal rights and procedures parents can follow to get their child an individualized free appropriate public education. Do you know the laws governing education in the UK? Do you know if organizations that can help you advocate? At a minimum, reach out to your autism society or developmental disabilities services organizations for guidance.

What the school is doing is dangerous. They need to teach your child about emotional regulation (check out the Zones of Regulation book and the 5 point scale book) and until he is able to modulate his own emotional responses, they need to be aware of his needs and provide for them before they escalate (set breaks, established “safe office” to go to. Many kids use a small card that they can hand the teacher to let them know they need a break and just go, but that is usually more mature kids—yours may be too young. He may also have sensory issues that are causing his anxiety. In the US, occupational therapists can help identify these triggers and work on sensory processing issues.

There is a great website with educational interventions that can work for kids on the autism spectrum here ocali.org/project/resource_...

Let us know what you find out about your sons educational rights and ability to appeal for help in getting them implemented.

[bdhb96]

Hi, just a general comment: I’m surprised to read in a few posts in the last few weeks that people have been using their pediatrician for guidance and looking to the school to administer testing. In my experience with both of my kids with a ten yr gap between their ages (meaning they had different doctors and different schools) pediatricians were only somewhat helpful and the schools only provide a minimal amount tests upon which they base years worth of education plans on. I would recommend going to a professional who specializes in your child’s needs and private testing with a psychologist who specializes in testing kids.

I have regrets for our slow approach for my older child. My older child didn’t have a diagnosis until 7th grade and didn’t start meds for another yr after that as we learned about all this new info and got used to just the idea of meds. My younger child was diagnosed at the end of second grade and started meds before 3rd grade and is now improving and starting to thrive. I knew the signs this time and understand that brain chemistry is just different. I don’t have to start at square one this time. I wish I’d know how so many years of not thriving in school would lead to generalized anxiety. I wish I could do things over for my oldest. I have regrets. I don’t want that to happen to my younger child...or yours!

Time is of the essence, don’t let more slip by when they’ve already had a period of time or years of school when they’re not thriving, not learning all that can because they’re distracted, anxious, etc.

Their childhood is creating a foundation to build upon. Don’t waste time with generalists to fill in the holes in their foundations. I know now, I don’t want to take a slow approach this time.

Good luck to you!

[Pennywink]

I'm not sure about what laws and services are required in the UK, but here is an organization you might want to contact and see what help you can get:

addiss.co.uk/

adhdeurope.eu/adhd-europe/m...