Hello!

[Stephd0706]

Hello,

My 5 year old was diagnosed with ADHD in September of last year and anxiety last month. I think he has mild ODD also. He has terrible meltdowns at school and I don't know how to help him. We have started the IEP process, but are still in the early stages.

[Onthemove1971]

Stephd0706-

Welcome! That is about the age our son was diagnosed.. he is now in middle school and is 12 years old. We are all on this journey together so if we can help reach out.

What helped us, although our son didn't have meltdowns, he had issues with peers, struggled with learning and getting in trouble so we started to see a counselor so he had a place to discuss these issues and we continue to see this person at least monthly. I do not feel once a month is enough because right around the time to go see him there is usually an issue.

We are also a family that strongly supports using medications and this is one of the things we feel has helped him to start to become more successful in school and at home. I know medication is not the answer for some, but for us he could not be nearly as functional. Let me know if you have any questions about this.

I have really learned that being a parent of a child with ADHD is a journey and it doesn't help to compare our child to "Neuro-typical" children because they do not not struggle with daily tasks ( brushing teeth, eating, school and peer interactions- just to name a few). So I have really benefited and found comfort with other parents, grandparents an people who have ADHD themselves.

If I could go back to 2nd or 3rd grade, I would have gotten a 504/IEP in the younger years and I would demand to work with a child psychiatrist to get him stable younger on medications

[Hidden]

Agree with Onthemove 100%. My daughter is 12 and was diagnosed bipolar and ADHD, anxiety and all that in the fall of last year. Her IEP has helped tremendously, but individual and counseling with her and I together has been the key. She goes weekly to individual counseling and she and I go together every other week. I also go to the same counselor every other week. It's NOT easy. You have to be willing to get uncomfortable and change yourself, but I'm telling you is is WORTH it. Just tonight we were talking about boys (!) and she looks me in the eye now and we laugh and laugh and she hugs me and we talk. There are really bad days. really bad days. But we practice coping skills. And we cry. And sometimes I cry after she falls asleep, or in the car after I drop her off. But we're doing it. And you will too! You're in the right place, everyone here is really supportive! HUGS.

[Cjkchamp]

Definitely on the right track! The school should be able to conduct a psychoeducational evaluation at your request to assist with the IEP.

[Pennywink]

In addition to seeking an IEP/504, I would also recommend learning as much as you can about ADHD, anxiety and ODD. The school psychologist really helped us out in learning about ADHD in the early days.

Smart but Scattered by Peg Dawson is great book for dealing with executive functioning issues - I’ve been recommended it by 3 separate mental health professionals.

All About ADHD by Thomas Phelan is also a terrific book for those just learning about ADHD.

After those, I would move on to the reading Russell Barkley, who has fabulous books about ADHD and ODD, and videos on YouTube (must watch!)

Also, finding a counselor who can guide you through parenting these disorders could be a huge help.

Best of luck helping your child!