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Hello ADHD group

Cowabunga profile image
15 Replies

I have a 5 year old son recently diagnosed with ADHD. He has been having a very hard time in kindergarten this year involving hitting and not listening to anyone at school as well as exhibiting risky behavior.

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Cowabunga profile image
Cowabunga
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15 Replies
ElinaK35 profile image
ElinaK35

Hi, welcome. Does your son feel like he can't control himself? Is there a plan the doctor put in place after giving the diagnosis? I hope you get the support you need through this forum.

Cowabunga profile image
Cowabunga in reply to ElinaK35

Yes my son says all the time that his brains gives him a hard time. He is super smart. Our pediatrician did not give us a plan. We went through private psychological testing on our own accord because of some similar issues in pre-school. We has a shadow for our son in pre-school but it became expensive because we paid out of pocket. I hope so too that I can get some help through this forum. If anything it's good to hear from you and others in this community. Thank you.

kcluanne profile image
kcluanne

Hello and welcome! I have a recently diagnosed 6 year old first grader who had similar behaviors in Kindergarten. We have her on medication now, she is in therapy and she has a tutor and things have improved quite a bit in the past few months. I hope this online community can support you and that it helps you feel like you are not alone. It still surprises me how many people I run into (family members included) that don't understand ADHD and think it is not a real diagnosis. It has been really helpful to have this resource of people who get it.

Cowabunga profile image
Cowabunga in reply to kcluanne

Thank you. I agree sometimes family members are not on the same page.

Cowabunga it is often easy to blame our child’s actions on their ADHD, but I found that sometimes I had to look at me. How and what was I doing to help or hinder my son’s success. I found that at times I was allowing him to do things that I wouldn’t allow my other children because he was diagnosed with ADHD. I needed to step back and begin treating him like a regular child. He wasn’t any more or less special than my other five. He had different ways of learning and we worked with that. I found that the more I treated him like he was different the worst things got, when I treated and gave him consequences like the others, things went very well. I wish you much luck and am always here if you would like more input. Beautyoutofahses54

Cowabunga profile image
Cowabunga in reply to beautyoutofashes54

I hear you. I have gone back to therapy for myself recently as I am totally aware that when I am feeling yucky it very hard to remain calm when these things are happening. I am working on getting back into things that give me the self care that will enable me to better help my son.

Welcome!!!! I think you find everyone here is super helpful and supportive. I'm so glad you have a diagnosis early! My daughter is soon to be 12 and we got her diagnosis this fall. I think the absolute hardest thing for parents is distinguishing between what can be manipulative and downright hurtful behavior and what is the ADHD or even another diagnosis. Co-morbidity in kids with ADHD is very, very high. My daughter is also bi-polar and there are a lot of parents on this site with kids that are also ODD.

Some days with my daughter I'm at my wits end, we go to family therapy and she has individual therapy. It has helped SO much. As we have progressed through this journey with medications and therapy, I am really much more able to distinguish between manipulation (i.e., whoa. ten minutes ago you were just fine and now you're in a puddle because you have to read for 30 minutes) and when she truly is so frustrated because she really didn't understand what happened that day in class.

HUGS, if you keep reading the posts here, you find SO much information, so WELCOME!

SylvieS profile image
SylvieS

I’ve been in a very similar situation. Our son is intellectually gifted but also suffers from poor working memory and executive function. He had issues in preschool but they really blew up once he started kindergarten. Shoving, getting in others space, meltdowns. Like you, we paid out of pocket for an assessment and he was diagnosed with ADHD and tics. It has been a long road and he is only in second grade now.

We started behavioral therapy and OT and put him in a social skills group. I think the OT was the most helpful. She identified some sensory issues and helped him learn techniques to control his “engine”. Once he turned 7 we started methylphenidate and it has made a noticeable difference.

We are still struggling to navigate schooling for our son. He is bright enough to do well in school and is getting by ( barely) socially so the school is not inclined to give him accommodations. At the same time they are not accelerating his schoolwork at all and he is desperate to actually learn.

I encourage you to advocate early for him in his school and provide them with any outside assessments. Your son is so lucky that he has a parent who is trying to get him support and answers early. Hugs. You are not alone.

22789 profile image
22789

I recommend having your son assessed through the school even though you have a diagnosis. He is likely eligible for accommodations through a 504 Plan at a minimum and perhaps, accommodations and support through an IEP. IEPs can include behavioral and social:emotional goals even if a student is doing fine academically. If assessed through the school, make sure the assessment includes speech language because students with ADHD often receive speech language services to work on social skills (rather than let’s say articulation or a speech impediment). They learn how to react to situations using words and understanding how other kids view how the handled a scenario. Some students’ IEPs include a behavior intervention plan as an attachment.

Cowabunga profile image
Cowabunga in reply to 22789

We have not have had an assessment done through the school yet. My husband is very hesitant to go that route yet. We work closely with his kindergarten teacher and have a daily behavioral chart that she uses. We had a therapist we were working with but are looking for a new one. Also considering OT but have not looked into that yet.

diannevachon2576 profile image
diannevachon2576

Hi I totally understand. I have two sons that have ADHD. First I have a question for you. You didn't answer back or just answering your head. Who diagnosed him. Also is that the only thing he was diagnosed with. A lot of time ADHD kids are diagnosed with ODD at the same time at the same. Does he have a IEP. Is it in his IEP. You need to update it. There could be some underlying issues hopefully you can talk to a a counselor maybe with him being that young a face to face counselor meeting at play Time counselor usually works with young kids. Because if he's hitting and things like that there might be something else that is bothering him and he won't tell you why or he doesn't know how to tell you. Just something to think about.

Cowabunga profile image
Cowabunga in reply to diannevachon2576

Thank you. He does not have an IEP. We have been consulting with his kindergarten teacher regularly. We had evaluation done by a psychologist on our own. We have been going to a therapist with my son but are looking for a new because they do not have time to meet us on a regular basis.

Ldydy24 profile image
Ldydy24 in reply to Cowabunga

Hi and welcome. My son was diagnosed in Kindergarten and we quickly moved from our pediatrician to a psychiatrist who specialized in pediatric ADHD. You didn’t mention medication which often is needed to help kids with ADHD. It’s made a big difference for my son and he’s now 14. I highly recommend seeking advice from a psychiatrist.

anirush profile image
anirush

Both of my grandson started having trouble with aggression in kindergarten. Finally putting them on medication to control their ADHD made them successful in the classroom.

Oldest grandson went from troublemaker to getting rewards for best in class.

KMLMPLS profile image
KMLMPLS

Our son (now 7 years old and in first grade) had the same experience. It was a rough kindergarten year but we didn't have issues in day care so it was so stressful. Our son was diagnosed with ADD back in August, we have a very comprehensive assessment by ADD experts. Our psychologist had a plan after the diagnosis and I know each plan varies widely for each person but for us, our psychologist suggested to start on a high level, good quality of Omega 3 for 6 weeks before starting medication. We buy OmegaBrite but I know there are other good brands out there. It's important to buy one that is manufactured specifically to ensure the Omega 3 doesn't break down when it's harvested.

We didn't see any changes to our son's focus or distractability with the OmegaBrite but we did see his emotions kind of soften and interesting, his potty issues stopped which had been a major source of frustration for all of us.

We started with ADD meds in early November and think we finally got the right dosage. I HIGHLY recommend finding some podcasts or reading about ADD medication. We listened to every podcast we could find about meds to understand what was ahead and it was really helpful. You can search for ADDTitude Magazine, CHADD, Understood.org, ADHD Essentials, etc. There are a lot of helpful ADD podcasts that have been extremely helpful to us. That is where we learned the medication that is tested first are stimulants and that's how our son started. Amphetamine (Adderall and others) or Methylphenedate (Rittalin and others). Meds have really helped our son (Adderall XR 7.5 mg) but there are some side effects. Nothing severe at this point but a few (harder for him to fall asleep and some sadness when his meds wear off). We are looking into a bunch of different supplements to address some of these so it's still a work in progress for us.

Good luck, you'll learn a lot here so don't hesitate to ask for help!

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