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Is this the beginning of what the teenage years will be like?

Matzijoe03 profile image

Attention parents/guardians of teenagers... I know that teenage years are trying in most families but are we to expect a different level of crazy? The past few weeks have been an ongoing rollercoaster ride with my very soon to be 13 year old. He plays very roughly with my 3 year old son and never let's up until the little one is crying. If he is having a bad day he makes it a point to pick at his siblings until the entire house is up in arms. Just today he had a full on melt down because I asked him if he locked the door. I kept asking him to stop but he just kept pushing the matter until I lost my cool and became completely upset at which point he stormed off into his room. I guess what I'm trying to see is if this is part of the ADHD in him..just having to push matters and seeking conflict or is it part of the growing pains of the teenage years ?

18 Replies

Hi there, I have Inattentive ADHD (I.A.). I'm not sure what type of ADHD your son has, but from what it sounds like, I assume he is either a combined type or has IA. When someone with I.A. goes through puberty, their reward system (dopamine and serotonin) drops quite dramatically in comparison to neurotypicals (people without a cognitive condition). This leads to very aggressive behavior and what is known as entering mental circles of rage. If the adolescent does not take medication along with supplements to help fight off bad side effects, then the teenage years can be quite negative, intense, emotional, and quite draining. As a teen I was in an irritable mood on a daily basis, I never felt like I could really connect with anyone, my energy levels were always really low, and my grades suffered because of it. If I did not get enough sleep or eat right, I would feel horrible for the entire day. I got myself diagnosed in my mid 20s, and started taking medication and supplements in order to help out my condition. It has dramatically changed my life for the better. Whether your son is taking medication or not, I highly recommend supplements. I am in grad school to become an MFT Psychologist and have been studying ADHD for over 4 years now, I will be publishing a book shortly.

Here are the supplements I recommend.

1. N-Acetyl Tyrosine: This supplement helps boost Dopamine and Norepinephrine, those are the two neurotransmitters most stimulant medications work with and they are the primary neurotransmitters people with ADHD lack. Great for focus, concentration, and motivation.

2. L-Tryptophan: this supplement is helpful for increasing Serotonin levels, since people with ADHD lack this neurotransmitter as well, especially the Hyperactive and Combined Type subtypes of ADHD, it is highly beneficial. This supplement elevates the mood, and helps the body relax.

3. I take a supplement called R-Alpha Lipoic Acid which is known to one of the most powerful antioxidants out there. It really helps stimulant medication work to its full potential while fighting off oxidation. Stimulant medication creates a large amount of oxidation that is not good for the body, and that can cause physical discomfort as well as mood swings because of it. This supplement helps my body feel at ease, and helps me mentally to mellow out. This supplement alone can help greatly with mood and mood swings.

4. B-12: Methyl-cobalamin form (most bioactive form): People with Adhd according to research have an issue with getting enough B-12. This is not due to diet but to differences in brain chemistry/makeup, and because of this our brain absorbs much less B12. When the brain/body does not get enough B12 it is common for there to be a lot of muscle fatigue and aches, along with feeling irritable more frequently.

If any of this sounds helpful and of your interest, you can click my pic and it will take you to my profile where I have a link in my bio that includes all these supplements as well all the ones I personally take, along with info as to why they help people with ADHD. I am not selling anything, the link will take you to a helpful google word doc I made that includes information on each supplement, what places sell it, and how much it costs (Amazon has the best prices in my opinion). In my profile you will also find a link to a youtube video series I made, detailing problems people with Inattentive ADHD go through from Elementary school through adulthood in case you're interested. I made these because not much attention is given to the Inattentive subtype of ADHD, and not many people know about it. Hope this helps.

Hi! Thank you so much for all the great information. Immediately after reading your response I started looking up your recommendations. I have ordered the supplements and am hoping to start him off on them Tuesday along side the Aderall. My son has is in fact a combination ADHD. He has suffered in school since he was in second grade. He absolutely hates school and has such a hard time making friends. He also has anxiety and a speech delay and I honestly believe these things factor into him not being able to form friendships. Everything you described essentially described my son. I have followed your page and look forward to your book release. It's great to read that you have done such great things and will without a doubt help countless people along the way.

Thank you again!

Thank you for the very kind words. The supplements should be of great help in those areas you mentioned were of difficulty. Keep in mind that the order in which your son takes the supplements is quite important. I have a post I made detailing a schedule I have of supplement intake. And also keep in mind that there are multiple supplent options to choose from incase one supplement does not go well with your son's neurochemistry. Hope all goes well

I never heard about the supplements. Thanks for sharing

thank you so much for this insight. My son is running to Pot (mariJ) to self medicate and fights me horribly on medication, even anything natural. THe constant excuses and lying to sneak out are making me crazy. I even had to get the police involved to control him. I will try this and hope it works,

thank you- MG

When my daughter was about 17 she was acting goofy One day and poking me and bumping into me and just trying to get a reaction. Finally, I sad, what are you trying to do! She said, oh haha, when I don't take the medicine, I get bored easily and just want some entertainment. She didn't say these exact words, but the point is, she was a pain in the neck! I didn't really see her at any good parts of a school day because usually after school, she was coming down off the stimulant and in a Very bad mood! The constant mood swings and her lack of helping around house and bad choices made all of us suffer! It's a hard time. I don't have a nuero typical kid so I don't have anything to compare to....I only know it sure didn't seem hard at my friends houses!

Good morning Courtney,

The afterschool mood swings sound about right. My son is the same way. Here they have minimum day on Tuesdays so I'm able to see the difference. He is more willing to interact with his family when the medication has not worn off. I know believe full heartedly that kids with ADHD developed at a slower rate and so the choices they make tend not to be what we would hope for. I have a daughter who just turned 11 and she is polar opposite of her brother. She excels in school, is helpful around the house and she tries her best to be the peacekeeper between my older boy and the baby. I've stopped going to birthday parties we've been invited to because I don't want to deal with any outbursts and for whatever reason my son always decides he's going to try pushing the limit most when we are in front of people. So I don't really have a way to compare as you mentioned. How old is your daughter now if you don't mind my asking?

Hi there you are not alone, I honestly think it’s their hormones. My son is 13 and was very angry and changed rapidly about 6 months ago as he was going through puberty. No affection and just a bad attitude. He takes meds that help him for his ADHD but he was definitely not himself. He’s just now starting to come back to his old self although he wants to have his own space and have a say in more decisions which I’m trying to do. He came up and kissed me the other day out of the blue and I about died! Keep having faith and be patient with him as he goes through this time. Let him know you won’t tolerate his bad behavior or attitude and there will be consequences for his actions. All I have to do is generally take away my son’s phone or video games to get his attention, Good luck.

Matzijoe03 profile image
Matzijoe03 in reply to Ldydy24

For some odd reason I thought the two last messages came from you and I only replied to the last one. Did you do anything differently recently that may be the cause of his being a bit more back to normal? I'm not going to say all days are bad but we do have a good amount of bad days. I just wish I could understand him better.

Ldydy24 profile image
Ldydy24 in reply to Matzijoe03

No that’s the crazy part. I didn’t do anything differently recently. As soon as I noticed him going through puberty I’ve just been trying not to hover over him and give him the space he needs. He’s growing like crazy so I know he’s going through a lot. We don’t tolerate any disrespect and when he does try to raise his voice and sounds off we try to remain calm as screaming back gets us no where but a huge battle. The one vice we have to punish him is his phone and video games and he knows it. They are his life line so he understands he needs to control himself. We are slowly seeing him mature. Keeping mg him on his meds schedule including a late afternoon dose definitely helps.

My 13 yo son is exactly the same some days, hel push and push for a rise until I snap then turn it around as if I’m in the wrong

Matzijoe03 profile image
Matzijoe03 in reply to Lloydxx

Hi there!

It's funny I read the replies or posts parents make here and I have never felt so understood in my life. For years now I've felt like no one understood what my family was going through and the constant turmoil. My son has always been a gentle soul, very loving and compassionate but since he was put on the medication he just has a hard time in the afternoon as it wears off. He has been put on different medications and different dosages but they all seem to have a similar effect some more than others. Currently it's what you mentioned he pushes until I snap and then he turns it around on me. Sometimes I find myself thinking he may have a point. I have yet to get him a phone because of his actions. He hasn't had his ps4 for roughly a year because he acts up so consistently. Sigh, I know things will get better eventually. For now though I feel like I'm going absolutely nuts. You mentioned he's just now getting back to himself, Have you done anything differently to help him make a turn for the better?

Lloydxx profile image
Lloydxx in reply to Matzijoe03

No he changed straight away after he started his medication, he still tries it on and has his off days but not often nowadays, his meds we’re leaving his system too soon and he too was acting up after school being really argumentative and quite angry so they put him on a booster tablet at 4.30 and it’s worked wonders (for now)

Matzijoe03 profile image
Matzijoe03 in reply to Lloydxx

It seems like that seems to be a common problem ? Most kids I've read about have melt downs and suck starting about 3 to 4 PM.

I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't even imagine how difficult the road has been for you. I've had my share of bad days but my husband is supportive of most things I try to do to help my son. This site is defenitly a huge help. Just reading some of the stories and being able to compare and exchange information is helpful. I don't feel as alone and crazy ? I do hope everything gets better for you and your daughter.

Thank you so much for your kind words! See, I found this site from Chadd and it brings me comfort and friendship. A lot of times, we live in shame ( I’m speaking for myself, mostly) and it’s hard to find people that can truly understand what you’re going through. Someone one said to me- oh, you’re so lucky to be naturally thin! I was like - Hey, God had to give me something! Everyone looked st me kinda strangely. I should just shut up!

It was my sons Dr that actually turned me on to this page. I was hesitant for a bit because I have only really encountered people who say ADHD is not an illness. So I fully understand the feeling shame part of it. I just learned not to talk about it because any feedback I would get was negative. I can see the humor in what you said, I mean sometimes it's the only way to deal with what can feel like a crap storm day in and day out. Heck i wish God had given me that something... instead I get to look like an rolly polly 😅

Yes theirs a name for it but I can’t remember what it’s called it’s the medication leaving the body too quickly

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