Unbiased advice please!

[mlarios03]

My younger brother, 27, and his daughter/my niece, 7, live at our parents' house. He has 50/50 custody, but because of his non traditional work schedule, my mother has become responsible for my niece's care. Im feeling angry and jealous because I dont receive the same family support for my 4 year old daughter with ADHD and would like your input.

I tried talking to both my mother and brother about the situation. I even wrote them letters.

I feel they are hogging grandparents time as well as the family's house. I want grandparents to spend quality time with my daughter too. I could use the break to go grocery shopping, a date, or just have an interrupted conversation with my husband). I understand that my daughter is my responsibility but i could use the occasional break. How come we have to pay a babysitter while they get free care with grandmother? Just because im older 33, still married, with degree, and career???

I feel that if my brother and niece want to become territorial of their rooms, establish house rules, and not want to deal with unwanted guests (meaning my daughter and I) for him to move out and get his own place!

Unbiased advice, tips, suggestions please. Can anyone relate???

[Grandma01]

I think you might be right, they should look for their own place. Treat him like you would any other tenant. Try to remove the portion that they are family cause that's what makes the situation even harder.

As far as time with your husband maybe make a date when she's at school.

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Parents tend to overhelp the ones that they feel are not doing a good job parenting so on a bright note know that your parents know that you and your husband are great parents. Maybe you could invite your parents over when your brother is home and can watch his own kid. This will at least hopefully foster a closer relationship with your daughter and her grandparents. You may also be able to discuss how you feel more if they are at your house. Good luck.