ADHD Parents Together
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One Step Forward, Two Steps Back!

I just thought I would share my story since I am new here. My son is 14 years-old and a freshman in HS. He is scheduled for an evaluation at the end of this month for ADD/ADHD. He is very bright and outgoing. For the most part he has done well in school...up until the end of 8th grade last year. Even though he is outgoing, he often gets distracted at school because he worries about what his peers think. He gets so focused on the social part of school, that he forgets he is there to learn. He has always procrastinated with homework, but this year is worse. It often feels like he takes one step forward (gets caught up with work) and then two steps back(gets behind again quickly). We argue daily about homework, since he often refuses to do it. It is like pulling teeth to get him to actually sit down and do it. Hoping he takes the initiative on his own to open his backpack and do what he needs to do seems less likely everyday. I have been in contact with all of his teachers too. I often hear, "he is capable but not putting the effort in". When I asked one of his teachers if he thinks he exhibits ADHD behaviors in class, his response to me was, "If you would have asked me any other year, my answer would be different. This year it seems the whole group of freshmen boys are very immature compared to previous years. Your son is not that different than many other boys in my class...as far as not using their time wisely/acting mature" . I take his phone away often since screens are his biggest distraction. I know lack of sleep plays a role in all this, which is why I take his phone away at 10 pm every night. Anyone else out there that does this? I often say to myself, let him experience the natural consequences of not doing his schoolwork...but it is hard. He is trying out for the basketball team and one teacher suggested that when they are busier sometimes, they tend to be more organized. He has a social worker/therapist who he has been seeing for a few years off and on, but I feel like he never walks away with any useful advice or tools. I am beginning to think it is time to switch therapists, but I know that will be a fight too since he likes the guy. I am thinking instead of a social worker that I should seek out a child psychologist instead. One day at a time, right?

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I am constantly battling with my son about schoolwork. It started when he first started school and now he is in 8th grade. They do say with ADHD you take one step forward and then two steps back. Everything can be good then all the sudden your back to the same old thing. My son is obsessed with his phone and video games. I take it away every night. Otherwise he’d be on it all night if he could.

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