New here and just looking for support

[fwhitt]

Hi all! I am new here and so excited to have people who are in a similar situation as me.

I have 2 boys with ADHD (my 10 year old is mostly inattentive and my 7 year old is mostly hyperactive) let me tell you it is challenging! My 10 year old is on concerta and there was an immediate change with school grades one he started but he is but there are skills that my son is still lacking (organization and prioritization being the main ones).

My 7 year old hasn't started taking meds yet. My youngest is so hyper and impulsive that it is sometimes seen as aggressive with other kids. So far it seems like school work isn't suffering but I am closely monitoring it.

I am trying to find ways to help this navigate this world that is not made for them, but I find that I don't know how to do that. I have read so much conflicting information about neuro feedback and wanted to see if anyone else has tried it and what results (if any) they saw. If anyone has advice or suggestion I am listening, are their any books that helped you? I know as frustrating as it is for me it is 10 times as frustrating for both of my kids.

[ScatteredMom]

Medicine can make a huge difference once you find the right one, but remember, it doesn't teach skills, it just makes it possible for the child to learn them, and that learning will take time. Your ADHD kids may always need a bit more help organizing their lives than other children of the same age, and that's OK.

I think that your family could benefit from some expert guidance, and it needs to come from the right sort of expert. Perhaps the doctor who prescribes your son's medicine can make some recommendations?

There's a lot of advice out there on organization, but most of it isn't too helpful for people with ADHD, because it's written by people who are naturally good at that sort of thing and lack insight into people who aren't. You need an ADHD expert.

For now, look up "executive function." That's the broad category of skills that children (and adults!) with ADHD have trouble with. ADHD kids are delayed several years in their executive function and will need help to learn them.

Finally, remember that they are literally learning skills, and failures need to be treated as the honest mistakes they often are, rather than deliberate disobedience. Would you yell at a kid for getting a math problem wrong? Of course not. We need to treat forgetting the homework in just the same way, as a mistake in a skill they are still learning, not a moral failure.

[Kaysmom84]

I love the book "smart but scattered" really helped us!

[Hidden]

My son has adhd along with execuative function issues he is 11. He is on adhd and mood medicine he also sees a counselor every 2 weeks. I praise alot and do rewards. Typical disipline does not work on these type of children.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Oh he also has anxiety

[Vlomie]

I have 3 boys 7-10.

7 diagnosed with extreme ADHD, and middle is ADHD but not as extreme, Oldest is mellow and easy compared to those two but he has mild ADHD.

YouTube:

How to ADHD.

I love her videos. She is an adult that has lived with ADHD and she gives information, tools, ect. Short sweet easy videos. My boys even like watching them (she's very charismatic - lol)

Smart but scattered book

ADDtitude magazine is awesome, and they have podcasts and online site. My sphyc Dr and Dr that did testing love this magazine.

I've tried a lot of things that are placebo and don't really do anything. I've found the things that are Dr backed and researched and/or info provided by actual ADHD ers are the best and more helpful.

[LuckyMonkey]

I also love HowToADHD, she lets you into her world in a way that helps to understand what's going on without the struggle of having to navigate through the meltdowns. Very helpful.