Supporting every mother you are not alone!

[VernaS]

I am mother of a eight year old son that has ADHD/ODD he is on medication. Sometime I have reminder myself that my son has a disability. There are days I have to pray and ask God to help to chose the right hat. It's sad that we does not have support group and it hard to find childcare.

[LuckyMonkey]

I hear you, mama, and you're not alone. Although we're not in a room together, know that this group is filled with parents exactly like you. Exhausted, concerned, sad, disappointed and sometimes lost. But we're also strong, loving, dedicated and steadfast in our goal to help our children grow into stable, happy, caring and nurturing adults. Each one of us has really hard days (or weeks or months) and it's important to share our struggles along with our successes. He's been on medication for 8 weeks and we're getting calls from school almost every day. Those are the bad situations. He also is loving and sweet and cuddly and kind. Those are the good situations. We're all in the same boat-take care of yourself, remain as calm and as disaffected as possible, and know this is a marathon, not a sprint.

[VernaS in reply to LuckyMonkey]

Yes, I know what you are talking about. My son is medication too.

[Engie33]

When I read your post it was as if I had written it myself. I also have an 8 year old boy with ADHD and ODD. We live in Texas. Please know that I understand what you are going through. I sometimes sat in my car at the school parking lot crying my eyes out because I did not know what to do. Some days are harder than others. However, we do have good days and I am grateful for those. He is under 504 and I just met with the special education department asking for an evaluation. They are saying that he will not qualify because he is academically gifted. We shall see. I am trying to establish an education team instead of attacking the school district. We shall see if he gets the help he needs. He has a lot of potential and I keep telling them that its all about the approach. Things can escalate quickly. He is now on meds and we are taking it one day at a time. He is my middle triplet. Hang in there. You are not alone.

[Barb82401 in reply to Engie33]

I'm so happy to hear you are being a strong advocate for your son at the school level. I have worked for san antonio ISD for several years as a preschool teacher assistant and as a special education systems clerk. I learned alot playing both sides, being an employee and as a parent with 2 children with diagnosed conditions. One daughter has been diagnosed with ADD since 3rd grade (now a sophmore) and one with social anxiety and depression since middle school (now a junior). It's SOOO important to know your rights and stick to your demands. The schools tend to push back and offer the least but stand your ground. Demand testing and retesting if necessary. If he doesn't already have a counselor, get one. Alot of times an outside counselor will be willing to come and sit in on the ARD meetings especially preliminary ones, and also help with getting him qualified and creating the IEP (individual education plan). There are people who volunteer just to be a parent advocate, people who know the system and fight for the parents right to get what the child needs. The districts hate dealing with them but they are sometimes necessary if you are not getting the results you need from the school. Please send me a private message if you need any advice on this. You child definitely qualifies at least for 504 but if they are still not doing enough with 504 then you still have the right to try for special education if he needs more support. Good luck!

[Engie33 in reply to Barb82401]

Thanks! He is currently under 504 and has had a Behavior Intervention Plan since kinder. He is now in 3rd grade. He also has a team outside of the school which includes a child psychiatrist, counselor who sees him once a week at school and a psychologist. The main issues he is having this year is running out of class. I just signed the authorization to have him evaluated for special education. I had been requesting this for a while. It was not until I met a random stranger at Main Event one day that I took by boys. He happened to be an advocate with the disability rights of Texas. He suggested I look on the website DRTx.org. I did and found a form letter which I tweaked and hand delivered to our school principal. I now feel we are moving forward in a more positive way. His teacher is amazing. I am always telling her and the rest of the school how grateful I am and I know its a lot more work they have to do. It takes a village to raise a child and in my humble opinion, its better to approach it this way.

We live in South Texas and I just joined CHADD yesterday. I was looking for a South Texas branch or support group but I can't find any. I will be attending at seminar tomorrow called "Raising Awareness, Ending Stigma" Hopefully, I can meet some experts that can help me start a support group in the Rio Grande Valley. We need it!

[VernaS in reply to Engie33]

Thank you Engie!!!! my son is SDC for behavioral. Social Development it is part of the special education. Yes, I live in Texas and I work for the school. When you do not know what do is trust God, we have speak life over the situation. I have a other son as well they are five years apart. I have some good days and some challenging day. The sad part is I do not have no to watch him. I left my job working at the state, but the Lord will make away. Hang in there because God knew you can make it!