Drinking when you have depression and anxiety do not mix!

Was treated to a lovely day out by a member of my family , which ended with a lovely meal and cocktails, I drank one too many cocktails (don't normally drink a lot) ended up finishing our evening locally and as I had too much to drink my emotions must have been high I spoke to someone about my feelings and so regret it, I go frequently to this place and feel I never want to go again, I am a private person and hate that I have given information about myself to someone I know will tell others, I feel sick to my stomach it has enhanced my depression and anxieties so much I'm so low. I feel I hate myself for allowing it to happen, I'm not even fully sure what I have said and I feel so embarrassed about that , although I do know the conversation was all based around my sadness, and everyone knows me as funny,happy, smiley..........

8 Replies

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  • They say that you can preserve many things in alcohol, but your dignity isn't one of them!

    It sounds as though you might have done yourself a favour, albeit unwittingly. If your social circle now know that you are suffering from depression they will, if they are any friends at all, now be able to support and help you. If you were trying to hide it from them you were just adding more stress to your life, which is bad enough with depression as it is! Don't be ashamed of it, depression is an illness, much like any other, except that it can be worse as it affects those around you as well as you yourself. If people know that you are ill, they should adjust their judgement of you, and in this day and age the stigma of admitting to poor mental health isn't what it once was, except amongst the ignorant.

    You can and will get better, and being honest with yourself and those around you is a good start on that path.

    Good luck, and lots of love.

  • Thank you so much for your response, and thank you for opening up the other perspective on it all. You are right ! I guess I find it hard to trust people and what they do with your vulnerabilities, but you have certainly helped me to look at this in a different light and I thank you for that very much.

    Much love

  • Hi

    Sorry you had such a lovely evening but feel so bad about it. When feeling low it's hard to accept ourselves let alo0ne imagine other people will accept us, but usually people respond to openness and honesty in a similar way - those who don't aren't worth bothering with or have problems of their own.

    Never mind your pride being hurt, being real matters much more. I think it's great that you let yourself be known as you are. Do it again, without getting drunk if possible!

    Take care, Suexxx

  • Thank you secondhand rose, all very true what you say, damn anxieties and depression make you dislike yourself so easily. It's my first time on here today and I must say its been nice to have responses and know there are people that understand.

    Thank you so much x x

  • Alcohol is the route of all evil. I have given up completely. Partly based on other stuff, but largely for the exact reasons you described. Saying things I later regret. I'm sure the friend you spoke to will actually appreciate your honesty though x

  • Interesting outlook Suzie.

    Personally I prefer to follow the maxim "in vino veritas" - or, as my Granny would have put it, "never trust a man who doesn't drink". Alcohol is, in my (warped and argumentative) view, much misunderstood as, like sport, it doesn't build character, but it is very effective at revealing it.

    Drinking breaks down walls and barriers - if you are worried about what that will reveal then don't do it. If you are happy with yourself then there's no problem. If it reveals a side of you that you are unhappy with then isn't it best to try and change that?

    Just playing devil's advocate here and trying to work it out for myself. I am no saint and I have had about half a bottle of wine so far! Today I had some food with it. Progress...

  • Hello Dolphin35

    Yes a couple of cocktails are lovely or a glass or two of wine it seems to enhance a happy mood. The problem for me I think is just that, the enhancement of moods, for me it can enhance anxiety and depression that may just be me, i guess we are all different although in moderation it should be fine I guess. I think it may not Suit me and maybe there is an element of choosing who you have a little tipple with. Not sure, ........I think because of my anxious nature I need to ensure I'm in control and not over do it, as it just adds to my angst.

    Everyone is different I guess and although I am aware of my anxieties and deal with them I choose not to tell certain people as I have also found that unfortunately it has lead to bullying in my life i have had experiences of people seeing the weakness and vulnerability and kind of homing in on it. human beings can be cruel....when I had one too many drinks I told someone about my anxieties I really would not have told had I not had one too many .............

  • Hi. it's Jamie here. I know exactly,what your talking about, I'm a long term sufferer from depression (30 years) and all that time Iv'e spent trying to hide the fact, You feel who can I trust with this info, but it's surprising because it's only a few people whom Iv'e trusted to tell, but to my amazement, the few I have told, have said we'll don't tell anyone else but I suffer from it too. Alcohol does not seem to affect me (ex rugby playing alki) so that aspect does,en't affect me that I open my mouth, and confess all. However I was on holiday about 4 years ago met this couple and he wanted to be my best friend for life, at the time I was in a Hyper mood ( I have Bi polar), and one night told them all about it, and for the rest of the holiday they just blanked us. So that has made me very careful about who I discuss it with, only my close family and friends who are fine about it. Perhaps it's because I live in a small Welsh Mining village, and there still seems to be a stigma to a mental health problem, (The most embarrassing experience.was similar to your's, but I did,en't have to tell anyone. I went to the mental health clinic I attend about once every 4 - 5 months and in the waiting room , was my friends wife, and a guy who drinks in my local.so we looked at each other, no one said a word to each other, so when we see each other in the village we avert our eyes.

    I'm sorry I,v'e seem to have gone on and on, but my advice to you is to try and forget what's happened, I expect you don't see them very often.so even if you said a little too much, they wont remember it, as regards to having a drink it helps you relax and enhances your mood, just keep it in moderation, and go home and off to bed if you feel it's starting to effect you.

    I really wish you well and believe me, as you go along in life the anxiety will gradually get better.

    My best wishes

    Jamie

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