being lucky!

I had my first assessment yesterday by the adult mental health team. It was OK although quite stressful. I was explaining that i feel if something can go wrong, it will for me. The lass interviewing me turned and said. "Well, I believe we make our own luck!". I was a bit dumbstruck as I have never believed this and feel it is a a put down. I feel as if she was telling me that I am responsible for the bad things that have happened to me and i am not a good person. I left feeling angry, upset very dissappointed I would appreciate any views on this please. Thank you

3 Replies

  • It doesn't sound as though she was suggesting that. Things can happen in life that are completely beyond our control - abusive parents, cheating husbands, redundancy, death of loved ones. While we are not responsible for these things happening, we are responsible for the way we deal with them afterwards. I don't believe that we make our own luck, but I believe we make our own happiness. Depression will never be cured with tablets and therapy alone. It takes a little bit of effort from the professionals and a huge effort on the part of the individual. I don't really thinkit was appropriate for the lady to be giving you her opinions, and on seeing you become distressed, she could have perhaps elaborated or at least tried to clarify her response x

  • Hi,

    You say the lasss which suggests she was quite young and it also sounds as though she lacked empathy which is sad as that's a basic skill for working in mental health. She shouldn't have been putting forward her own views in that way, particularly not in an assessment - it sounds as though she was juding you rather than assessing you.

    Even if she was telling you that you are responsible for bad things that have happened to you it is very unlikely that is true for many of them and how on earth could she know whether you are a good person? It sounds as though you fear those things about yourself, but neither of them are likely to be true.

    Did you get anything helpful at all from the assessment?


  • I am not looking forward to my appointment with the Mental health team even more so now !

    I might be better off cancelling as I know if I get any remarks like that I will explode ! NO ONE can pick and choose what life throws at you!! ok you can steer away from some things but others if they were meant to happen they will! I am getting sick and tired of these so called "Caring Proffessionals" coming out ith rubbish like that ! SOrry rant over but it is how I feel!

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