Seeking some buddy support : I’ve... - Weight Loss Support

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Seeking some buddy support

mgb2020 profile image
17 Replies

I’ve struggled with my weight for as long as I can remember. I was always told I was “too big” or that I need to lose weight, or just plain “fat”.

Sometimes I look back on my photos and see someone who wasn’t necessarily worryingly overweight yet somehow I was made to feel like I was horrendous.

I know I have an unhealthy love hate relationship with food which I am trying to mindfully work on.

To date I have a 43.6% body fat percentage and I need to drop down to 32% to be on the cusp of “acceptable”. It feels I have quite a way to go and I’m finding it difficult to move past the sadness to then kick into gear. All day I mask this sadness and I feel depleted once I can put the mask away.

I don’t know how to start. It’s like every day is day 1. Sometimes day 2 starts then becomes day 1 again. I see or get given food I don’t even want and I eat it.

If anyone has any advice or is keen to be an accountability buddy, I am open to suggestions.

Thank you for reading

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mgb2020 profile image
mgb2020
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17 Replies
08Jasper12 profile image
08Jasper12

Hi it’s really hard when you struggle daily. I have always struggled with weight and it’s really hard when you like to eat and drink. I have been doing the Keto diet and I have lost nearly one stone it is hard to stick to though so I’m going to start adding in more carbs. I find This low carb has really helped though and I feel better for it. If I can help in any way feel free to ask good luck there is a lot of support out there 😊

in reply to08Jasper12

Always have a mixture of food types. Include dairy, carbs, proteins, veg and fruits. Do not limit yourself. The diets are not sustainable. What I love about the nhs is the hundreds of recipes that they have online. They have so much info on 5 a day. It's really important to do exercise regularly as well as eat healthy. The diets will never work. It's all about exercise and following the nhs 5 a day. Following those steps (above) are sustainable. 🙏🏿

Camella X

I think 1stly you need to stop listening to others. You need to feel happy and love yourself how you are!! Because your allowing others to make you feel bad your comfort eating to make yourself feel bad. Forget what others think or how they make you feel.

How do you feel about yourself?

Do you want to make chages to your health and weight?

If so are you committed to a healthier lifestyle?

MissisB profile image
MissisB4 stone

Hello and welcome mgb2020

Aw, bless you. You have clearly not been made to feel valued for who you are - but you will find yourself amongst people here who understand what it is to weigh more than we want, and to put a brave face on things when sometimes that is far from what we feel inside.

So. Take one step at a time, and take a look at the Pinned Posts section here, and in particular the Welcome Newbies post. You will find all the information you need to find your way around, explain things, and help you find the best way to lose weight in a healthy way and be motivated to do this and enjoy it. TIme spent reading through this to help you understand things, really will be time well spent.

Another reminder - we know what it feels like - so join in, every day if you can. Choose to come and read and have a little chat somewhere with someone - it will keep you to move from Day 1 to Day 2 and beyond and will encourage you to keep going. And we all learn so much from each other here - as a peer to peer support group we are able to share what works for us and understand what it is like for someone else.

How about joining the Weigh In today as a first start - they will make you feel very welcome and you will have a group of people you can share your ups and downs with every week - it is a great place to be.

If you have questions, just ask. We have all learnt by doing just that, and we none of us arrive here with all the answers.

Wishing you all the best.

mgb2020 profile image
mgb2020 in reply toMissisB

Hi MissisB,

I think the weigh-in today will be a good starting point for me, thank you for the suggestion!

in reply tomgb2020

Good luck honey!

N-o-r-d-i profile image
N-o-r-d-iMaintainer64kg

Hi, most of your post sounds like I could have written myself. Looking at pictures and realising it wasn’t that bad, when at the time you felt awful - that’s really familiar and quite sad. If we look at things one day at a time, then it doesn’t matter that much if it’s day 1, day 10 or day 100. I don’t know if it would help you, but what helped me was my decision to start logging food in MyFitnessPal. The first step was only to log everything, honestly and daily, however bad it was. That automatically made me control food a bit better, then I introduced daily limit to aim for, then started checking out the nutrients and choosing healthier options. It wasn’t too drastic to start and, least so far, seems possible to maintain. If there is any way I could help, let me know 🤗

Scottie74 profile image
Scottie742lbs in reply toN-o-r-d-i

Fabulous reply 🤗🤗🤗🤗

Mummywilliams profile image
Mummywilliams

Same advice as N-o-r-d-i I have battled with my weight all of my life and sometimes no matter how hard I try if that’s little switch in my brain is not turned on I don’t last more than a day, this time I’m in about my 13th week and lost over 2 1/2 stone all with the help of my fitness pal it keeps you focused all day by filling it in and encourages you to choose healthier food I still eat a packet of crisps everyday and a biscuit. The other thing I have started is exercise I find if you can do it in the morning it keeps you positive all day just walking is enough and it helps to make you feel better through natural chemicals in the brain.

Good luck go for it you can do it here to g help if needed 💓

mgb2020 profile image
mgb2020

I am overwhelmed with the kindness and support from everyone. Thank you for taking the time to read and respond, I appreciate it all!

It’s a tough road and my mind is still blurry at the moment but I’ll keep searching around here for some guidance.

Thank you all

Scottie74 profile image
Scottie742lbs in reply tomgb2020

You CAN do this and YOU ARE WORTH IT 🤗

Hi there,

Start today. Do something different today. Why not take a walk in your local park. It's all about clearing your mind and getting a clearly prospective.

Please go for a walk today. I welcome you to come back to this group tomorrow and explain to us how you felt after your walk. It's really important to move around. Exercise is so important. What are you doing at the moment for fitness? I can help you with that. For nutiriton you could start to follow the nhs 12 week programme. Plus use My Fitness Pal to track your calories. Get excited about your journey. You will smash it!

Let me help you.

I regualry run. I previously competed as a gymnast. Sports is a great release. It's a great way to teach self-discipline.

Camella X

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator2 stone in reply to

My Fitness Pal is good for tracking calories but the calorie allowance is lower than it need be and lower than the NHS BMI calculator suggests, for anyone following the NHS 12 week plan

in reply toBridgeGirl

As you say it's good for tracking calories. Therefore it is a useful tool.

There are also plenty of options in terms of the food choices so that you can track what you eat.

If people follow the nhs 12 week plan which I always recommend, then of course when you sign up to my fitness pal you can still use your own "goal setting" target whether it be 2000kcal take away nhs recommendations of 600kcal, in order to lose weight at a safe rate. That's perfectly acceptable. The app is excellent to help track calories.

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator2 stone in reply to

Yes. Sometimes people don't realise they can adjust the setting on MFP to the one suggested by the NHS BMI calculator

Sewn profile image
Sewn

I have been using My Fitness Pal but I find that I need to keep to the suggested calorie allowance in order to lose.

I was content to coast in Lockdown but have gone back to MFP as I still have 1 and a 1/2 stone to go. I put 4 on but have lost 2 this week.

I will try to walk like we did at the start of lockdown.

School holidays or any holidays can be awkward.

One day at a time mgb x

Put some string around your tummy and cut the length. Every month pop the string back, it is a fabulous way to see progress :)

I can now tell myself 2 pounds is very little, you can sort this. Look how far you have come!

It is not worth worrying about, that is a huge step for me ;)

Read4 profile image
Read4

Morning mgb2020

I am starting my weight lose journey so understand how you feel.

I went to my first diet club when I was 9stone 3lbs can you believe. I really went to accompany my mum but it was the biggest mistake of my life as this began the yo yo dieting cycle. Losing weight and putting it back on. 40 years later I am the heaviest I have ever been. I have a different attitude now though. I accept that there have been lots of reasons why this has happened but mostly because I am an emotional eater. I eat when I am unhappy. I eat when I am happy and any emotion in between! However I also accept that I am human and humans experience emotions. I have decided to stop beating myself up over it. I am where I am. What’s happened in the past is over and done with and it’s the present and future that’s important now. I am going to accept myself as I am now and look to the future and how I want to be. I love food, cooking it and eating it. So I’m not going to give up on it. I am going to hopefully choose healthy food more than unhealthy food because I know my body needs it and I know it will make me feel better. I am going to be kind to myself and accept that some days will be tougher than others but that’s ok. I have just started counting calories to give me an idea of portion size but certainly won’t weigh every meal out. I am going to try and stick to three meals a day but cut the size of them as I realise now my portions were getting quite big. I am taking recipes from lots of different sources. I have planned my meals for the next week and shopped accordingly. I’m just going to take each day as it comes and be kind to myself. I will talk to myself as if I’m talking to a friend. I know this all sounds wonderful, like I’m in total control. Today I feel like I am but who knows how I will feel tomorrow.

Good luck to you. Please remember to be kind to yourself as you are human too. Xx

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