Hi, I'm izzi and I'm 20 years old, I was a size 22 last year and started losing weight around June 2016, I'm now a dress size 14-18 depending on where I shop, but I just feel guilty all the time when I eat, I've broken down crying in the supermarket just because I fear buying food, and every time I look in the mirror, I see this huge body I had like it never left, all the stretch marks I see, I feel like they're reappearing constantly (they began to fade as I lost weight) But I feel like they're constantly changing from light to dark (Maybe it's all in my head due to this guilt I feel)
I came across this and felt like joining to see if I could find some advice to help deal with this...
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IzziMitchello
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I am so sorry that you feel like this, i can totally relate to your post. I felt exactly the same as you before i started my weight loss journey here.
You have definitely come to the right place and will never be on your own, as we are all going through the same journey. The support here is fantastic and the people are so friendly.
One of the Administrators will reply to you with lots of useful advice.
Wishing you all the best with your weight loss journey
Well done for your weight lose so far, that a fantastic drop in size.
I can relate to the fear of buying food in supermarkets, this was a big problem to me in my early twenties. As a recovered person once had an eating disorder, can tell you there are days when i can't bring myself to buy food, i can end up going to two or three shops with nothing. It doesn't happen often now, i have come along way since then. I sometimes think its so ironic i put on so much weight, when years ago i was so slim, too slim, didn't have periods, gone from the two extremes.
I hope you grow in confidence in your journey and the positive voices keep you focused.
Hi there Izzy, I think that we all get these thoughts from time to time. If they are about cakes or crisps then they can be useful, but if they are about good food they are something to watch.
I have lost a fair bit of weight and I know that I look different, but when I look in the mirror I see the same view as before. I have to tell myself to look closer and then I see it.
You have done really well so far and you should never forget this. If I need a pick me up I put on some of my old clothes - it really makes me feel like a weight loss hero!
To get where we all need to get to involves eating the right amount of the right stuff at the right time. There's no quick fix. We have all tried eating too little and it leads to falling off the wagon or putting the body into starvation mode which seems to cause weight gain. It also means that we are much more likely to put weight back on, because we have treated weight loss as a diet and not a lifestyle change. Next time you are in the supermarket try telling yourself this.
Sounds to me like you have nothing to feel guilty about and a lot to be proud of! You certainly shouldn't feel bad about yourself for how you look, everyone is unique or everyone would be boring! Think about what you've achieved so far and how you're going to achieve more going forward. Losing weight is hard, especially the last little bit, you can't beat yourself up and worry about food all the time or you'll just be miserable. But if shopping makes you feel crappy, you could always do it online. It helps you not be tempted by impulse buys and saves you going in there in the first place. There's also companies that send you a weeks food for like £50 and a set of recipies to follow with it, I used one for a while it was great and there was nothing in the fridge to feel bad about!
Hello and thank you for your honesty. That's your best behaviour -to be honest with yourself and people you trust about how you really feel and what difficult thoughts you've been having. This is a great place to get support. The encouraging words and experience is so helpful, I've found. Have you thought about also telling someone close to you about these things so they can check in with you how things are as you go forward in your journey? You are going to have to be really brave and beat those guilty feelings into submission and go get that food anyway so your efforts aren't sabotaged! Be strong and courageous you can do it! Maybe take a friend who understands. Or pick a good day and be kind to yourself on the days when it is not so easy. You will get there. The weight loss is fantastic and I'm really inspired to hear your story so as well as being supported,you are helping others! Win win!
Great to have you join us IzziMitchello So sorry to hear of a developing phobia of food.. You will get good company and encouragement here...
Enjoy the forum...
I'd like to invite you to join our Newbie Club, which we trust will be a good place for you to connect with other members, who like you are also just starting out on this forum. Please post a few words to introduce yourself and respond to others there, you'll soon realise the encouragement and support this forum offers.
Well done on your weight loss so far Izzy, and welcome to the site. I deal with food now by looking for quality over quantity, and sticking to a list or shopping on line - less distractions and impulse buys that way! So I'll buy the posh tomatoes/bread/fruit - which I used to think of as treats - and not feel guilty about enjoying them as I am buying less overall and they are good for me, plus I've accounted for the calories. Something has to be worth the calories if I'm going to buy it.
Regarding your body image - I found this too. I've lost over 4 stone (with the NHS plan and this site) and am quite petite so it has shown. To other people, my weight loss stands out. To me, I look in the mirror and couldn't see what all the fuss is about. When I was shopping for new swimwear in the summer I picked up a size 12 and actually told the assistant it was wrongly labelled as it was too large. Truth was, in that shop I needed an eight. It's like my brain hasn't quite caught up with my body. But it is starting to. I think it's quite common not to see the new you in the mirror, and it takes a while. But you'll get there.
What I really do notice is how I can now walk for miles and enjoy it, how I can fit into old clothes I'd forgotten about, and I don't get out of breath when I walk up the stairs. These little things improve how I feel about myself. So maybe try to think of things that make you feel good about yourself and reward yourself for them, and leave that mirror alone for a bit! Good luck with your journey.
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