I hate spring. Awful. Have to xcountry ski ,because the weather is awesome!!!
We do not often have this much snow this late. It was +7 , sunny and snow crust so you get to go where ever you want to in the forest. Best thing i know. Best thing you can do pants on! I could ski every day. But... Here i am feeling ill because it wears me out. But i had to go. I hate this 😶 its only small trips i can do anyway, but as I skate ski its more taxing, because of the lenght of the skiing pole.
It does look beautiful - no wonder you want to ski.
Exactly. I am not supposed to exercise, but can't help it. It's my bad habit triggered by good weather 
Oh my I miss xcountry skiing... my aim is to be able to fly and travel so that I can experience it again. More snow photos please. I have to get by with webcams. Thanks and totally get it.
I read your profile. Are you still sensitive to noise etc? I am not medicated and physically not in so bad condition as you are but I often need to be in quiet dark room and any noise either irritates or distracts me. I often do not tolerate other people in same place as any noise they make sort of suffocates me. Can't explain it. I figured it's possibly thyroid related and just try to cope with it.
Thanks JustiinaI know exactly what you mean: I was severely light and noise sensitive and although better now I get light sensitive when tired and though now music obsessed I have to be in charge of volume and the genre/artist. I retire regularly to have peace and quiet.
I think the idea of being suffocated by others is exactly right, some people only had to be in the same room and I was not restful. Perhaps we become very sensitive to the electromagnetic fields they are transmitting. Or onstinctively know that company is not always compatible with rest and recovery.
I would be skiing to on such a day no matter how short a trip and the rest required afterwards.
That's what I do. I ski a bit knowing I need a lot of resting afterwards. But it's a sacrifice I make willingly. Skiing and enjoying the nature gives me something and makes me feel good otherwise. Mind rests.
I like nature so many ways. During fall I love to go pick berries and enjoy the scenery.
It's very therapeutic!
I think it is one thing keeping me sane while handling this illness until hopefully getting treatment.
Being such a lonely wolf sometime bugs me but on the other hand I am very content just on my own as well. I do not feel anxious. I feel very good just alone reading or watching movies etc. I get more done alone as I can do things as slow or fast I feel doing so and I don't have to explain why I am slow.
Otherwise I am very outgoing and social and I enjoy having good conversations and company but only until to a certain point. Even if I were laying on the sofa , talking will wear me out.
Many people can't understand the need to be alone as they can't handle the quietness and their own thoughts. Those people are very taxing as they demand your attention just because they need someone.
I have that light sensitivity too when I am tired. Vitamin A has lessened it tho to a level I can tolerate. I figured I had vitamin A deficiency as well as it does cause light sensitivity.
Good to hear you have improved some, it gives hope that I might eventually have a bit easier life too 
Finland is certainly on my list to travel to again. I went Savonlinna for a week for work in 2002 and thought that I would love to ski and use the sauna in the woods.
We certainly need to be resilient when this ill as we are forced to spend many hours alone. I find that it is my reset mode even though I am way better than a year ago. I am now largely chair based rather than simply in bed. Sewing and drawing/painting helped me pass the time, with a quilt that took 4 years to produce. And two chrocheted blankets. I used radio and story tapes a lot as I could be engaged by that but also be sewing when my hands weren't numb. When better still I don't think that I will ever be able to return to busy places that have lots of background noise.
Amazingly easy isn't it to spot the people that we need to avoid! You will get better if you are doing everything in your power to sort out your life and your symptoms so keep believing. And getting benefits takes some of the pressure off?😊
It's good you can do crafting. To me crafting is like therapy , unfortunately at this point my hands ache so can't do much. I have always liked to do stuff like that anyway. I like building things, fixing stuff, gardening, it is very satisfying so as I person I am more that type who isn't going to be depressed if I can't go night clubs, concerts and travel in big cities. I do not feel I am missing anything else except being around other people and be less selfish.
I hope you get to experience proper finnish sauna. There is something magical about it. Almost spiritual. But sauna has always been a very meaningful place for us finns and we have a lot of different rituals.
Sauna used to be a place where people were born as it's clean and dead people were washed before burying. Sauna was warmed up for a sauna elf as they believed if you do not do that elf will burn your sauna. Oven in the sauna often makes banging noise while heating and kids were told it's sauna elf and kids were not allowed to talk or laugh at sauna. They would bang the walls of sauna with their hands to drive away bad spirits.
Young couple were given a bath before wedding. They were beaten with branches to drive away the spirit of old lovers. Now we use silver birch branches to beat ourselves just for fun but it feels refreshing!
We finns have a bit different view of nudity as we get used to it as most families go go sauna together until kids are old enough not wanting to go with parents.
We simply love saunas and I have privilege to use sauna that it's heated by wood. Heating up a sauna is also very therapeutic thing. I love it. I love to watch the fire and listen to it.
To me that is real life!
I too was someone to be outdoors and doing. I was working at the university so as the only visitor I had the swimming pool and the sauna to myself whilst I was there. The reason that I went was the question: what do Finns wear in the sauna? I got the question right and was willing to follow local customs so I went on the exchange trip. But you are reminding me of the sauna in the woods: the tracks are lit at night and the sauna operates for all comers (wood burning). I was there in early November before the snow settled and dream of going back. I totally get it re the sauna. Just have to be able to get out of the chair. My hands were swollen, sore and numb but I found that I could sew or crochet in 20 minute bursts, which is why the quilt took 4 years. Now they are just numb periodically which seems entirely manageable.
sometimes it's freaking cold here and it's a shock for even me who is supposed to gotten used to it!
Summer in finland can be very exotic as we have midnight sun and beautiful nature. Up here north we have loads of exotic mosquitoes lol.
My sister in law who is from southern finland suffers here up north and goes on and on how many mosquito bites she has. I always tell her that if we would count all bites we had no time to do anything else. You just get used to mosquitoes and all other tiny crearetures that bite you. Fortunately mosquitoes over here do not spread illnesses so less to worry!
How did you like sauna? It's one of my favourite things. Naturally. I go to sauna 3 times a week and I feel it's one important factor that helps me to feel somewhat healthy as you sweat in sauna.
I hope you are able to come back some summer and enjoy!
I have a FIR sauna here that I use every day but long to be able to tolerate a real one. So much to miss! But I do wear my Nordic walking shoes sometimes that are Solomon so feel that I am a bit closer. Just need to get the walking poles out next. Lots to look forward to.
Cool, FIR is excellent way to detox and treat yourself. I have never tried it but anyone I know who has says it's awesome. For some it has been the life changer. But as it helps to increase the temperature inside the cells it activates all enzymes that need certain body temperature to work.
That is something most doctors will never understand ,unfortunately even it's basic biology. It's a shame it's ignored.
Well I feel better for using it even if I can't tolerate it for very long. And it is at home so very convenient. It seems that after a while sorting the house for my illness , and in my ninth year of pretty much being confined here, once I am a bit better I don't actually want to be home. That is what I dream of as well as being able to eat out safely. Need to be able to add in more foods...
I've heard about the mosquitoes 😱 I'm not a big fan of things that bite. We have a horsefly season here, they are awful, much worse than mosquitoes. I guess you just have to cover up well and use deterrent.
Up North we have all types of nasty stuff that bites, stings and burns. Smallest ones you can't see, they burn or bite a piece of you and next day you see a huge lump. Horseflies attack you on swamps when picking berries.
But it's not all summer fortunately lol
Then we have bears lurking in the bushes , but if you let them know you are there they run away. You can often see they have just been there, paw print, vomit or fresh poo.
Reindeer hang around here, they are not afraid of humans.
So north is great place 
But southern finland is pretty ,different way , lakes as you said and different type of plants and trees.
Finland is awesome and we are awesome people. Will post a link here of a video that is quite funny. It really represent the sense of humour we have. I laughed at this video as it's something so typical for a finn.
Feeling low
OT Breast health
Absolutely awful, is there anything I can do further.
Sigh :-( fed up today :-(
Feeling the heart beats 
